Author Archives: Debbie Burke

About Debbie Burke

Debbie writes the Tawny Lindholm series, Montana thrillers infused with psychological suspense. Her books have won the Kindle Scout contest, the Zebulon Award, and were finalists for the Eric Hoffer Book Award and BestThrillers.com. Her articles received journalism awards in international publications. She is a founding member of Authors of the Flathead and helps to plan the annual Flathead River Writers Conference in Kalispell, Montana. Her greatest joy is mentoring young writers. http://www.debbieburkewriter.com

True Crime Thursday – Black Widows

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Before we get into today’s True Crime Thursday post, I received an email from another friend of Joe Hartlaub’s who just learned of Joe’s passing. Justin L. Murphy asked me to include his tribute message to Joe. Justin’s words:

Could you please add these comments to the memorial post for Joe Hartlaub on KillZone blog earlier this month? I was late in learning of his passing — only discovering so last night after no email responses in the last couple of weeks.

As writers, Joe Hartlaub and I became close over the years and exchanged many emails. He not only recommended me for a short story contest (which I didn’t win), but was there for me when my grandmother passed several years ago. This is a tough one.

I last received an email from him May 28th, only to discover he died the next day. It’s sad we didn’t get to talk further. In one of our last emails, he discussed learning how to play “When The Saints Go Marching In” on the piano as well as his past playing guitar in local bands. We both mentioned our love for cooking Zatarain’s and his past trips to New Orleans. As well as his love for music from Memphis and Mississippi. He also called me “an observant fellow” and sent me hilarious articles on women getting too close to Bison at Yellowstone, being mauled and trampled as a result.

One of the last things he told me “You and your family have had more than your fair share of challenges, but reading between the lines of your accounts of daily living, I take the sense that you mom is strong, wonderful person and she has two terrific sons. The three of you help and love each other. That is more than many, many people have. Stay the course and thanks for being my friend.” He sent this to me after checking on us and asking “Are you OK?” when a storm hit a nearby area. My response in the subject line was, “For a tender hearted Catholic lawyer who cares”. To clarify, I’m a disabled adult with Cerebral Palsy who helps care for an Autistic adult brother.

He also relayed having chest pains and that his ex-girlfriend was dying from cancer. Joe remained in touch with her, but was having difficulty. As well as having chest pains and would be getting medical exams. Yet was overjoyed over his granddaughter’s graduation. In his couple of emails, he concluded “Love to you and your family” and “Thx Brother”.

I love you too, Joe. Thanks for all you shared with me and I wish you still were here.

 

Photo credit: Chuck Evans CCA 2.5 generic

by Debbie Burke

In a 1911 poem, Rudyard Kipling wrote:

“The female of the species is more deadly than the male.”

That seems to hold true with the female black widow spider. After she mates with a male, she sometimes eats him. Here’s Wikipedia’s explanation:

The prevalence of sexual cannibalism, a behaviour in which the female eats the male after mating, has inspired the common name “widow spiders”.[11] This behaviour may promote the survival odds of the offspring;[12] however, females of some species only rarely show this behaviour, and much of the documented evidence for sexual cannibalism has been observed in laboratory cages where the males could not escape. Male black widow spiders tend to select their mates by determining if the female has eaten already to avoid being eaten themselves.

The term “black widow” has come to mean a woman who kills her mate.

Praying Mantis – public domain

Although the praying mantis also engages in sexual cannibalism, “black widow” sounds scarier, doesn’t it?

In 2013, a 25-year-old man named Cody Johnson married 22-year-old Jordan Graham in Kalispell, Montana. Eight days later, he disappeared.

As early as the day after the wedding, Graham had second thoughts about the marriage which she expressed to friends.

Johnson’s friends had also been concerned because he was deeply in love with Graham but his devotion didn’t seem to be reciprocated.

When Johnson didn’t show up for work, a search was launched. He was last reported in Glacier National Park, recorded on a security cam in a car with Graham. She claimed they had driven to the Big Bend on Going to the Sun Road where a steep cliff drops off sharply to the valley hundreds of feet below. There, she said, friends of Johnson’s had arrived in a different vehicle, and he had left with them.

Because the park is on federal land, various agencies including the FBI investigated the case. They questioned Graham multiple times. Each time, she offered a different excuse for why Johnson had disappeared.

Going to the Sun Road, Glacier National Park, Montana – public domain

Her behavior was suspicious, sometimes giggling and other times withdrawn. While searchers risked their lives on steep dangerous mountainsides, she exchanged texts with friends about dance moves.

She soon produced an email purportedly written by a friend of Johnson’s who claimed Johnson was dead and to give up the search. It didn’t take long for investigators to trace the email to a computer at the home of Graham’s parents.

Johnson’s battered, broken body was found at the bottom of the cliffs below the Big Bend. Because the terrain was so treacherous, specialized lift equipment was required to recover the body.

Graham was charged with first and second-degree murder.

During her 2014 trial, she pleaded not guilty. The evidence against her was significant but not beyond a reasonable doubt. Her attorney characterized her as “child-like” apparently a bid to convince the judge she didn’t understand consequences of actions.

For several days, Graham continued to protest her innocence. Then right after the defense rested, Graham stunned the court and changed her plea to guilty.

She admitted driving with Johnson to the Big Bend where they got out of the car and argued at the edge of the cliff. She said she didn’t think people would believe her about an accidental fall so she gave various excuses for his disappearance.

Under questioning by the judge, she finally admitted that, when Johnson had turned his back on her to look out at the view, she used both hands to push him over the side.

The judge doubted her remorse and sentenced her to 30 years in prison.

TKZers: Kipling seemed to be correct in this case. What do you think of his opinion?

~~~

 

My new book The Villain’s Journey – How to Create Villains Readers Love to Hate features stories about dangerous Black Widows and Femme Fatales from fiction and real life. To learn more, please click on the book cover.

Story 360 Conference Made My Head Spin…in a Good Way!

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Lorin Oberweger, leader of Story 360 Writing Conference, and happy sttendee Debbie Burke

by Debbie Burke

The views from the top floor of the Centre Club in downtown Tampa, Florida were 360 degrees, vast and expansive. So was the content at the aptly named Story 360 Writing Conference I attended a couple of weekends ago. I came away almost dizzy from the talks by Christopher Vogler, Donald Maass, Janice Hardy, and other authors.

Don Maass is a respected agent, educator, and author of Writing the Breakout Novel, The Emotional Craft of Fiction, Writing 21st Century Fiction, plus numerous novels. His all-day master class on Friday, “Writing with Soul,” was packed with prompts and questions for writers to ask themselves. His style is not to present fiction writing techniques but rather to lead you up a ladder to the high diving board and push you off.

He reframed conflict, a typical requirement for stories, into provocation. Every line of dialogue is a provocation that requires a response. He said to a woman in the audience, “You look nice today,” to which she responded, “You want to get closer, take a better look?” That comeback brought down the house because it perfectly illustrated Don’s point.

He asked, “What event in your story provokes a response from your protagonist?” then offered possibilities: a compliment, an insult, a temptation, a dare, an embarrassment, a setback, a wound, a gift, etc.

Next, he asked, “What is your protagonist’s response to that provocation?” Beyond the primary responses of fight, flight, or freeze, he added diffuse, appease, dissent, ignore, judge, respond in kind, reach out in sympathy, walk away in disgust, or tell the world.

For the last choice, he described a guy in a NY Irish bar who is provoked and loudly announces to everyone there, “Did you hear what he said to me? Did you hear what that &%*$ said to me?”

The character’s response is what we as readers would like to do, not what we would actually do.

Don’s talk yielded 34 pages of hastily scribbled notes plus kept my mind spinning like a hamster in a wheel.

Thanks for a sleepless night, Don!

While talking with other attendees, I learned many of them are frequent flyers who’d taken Don’s classes previously and keep coming back. That says it all.

~~~

Side note: Several people had been to a conference years ago that featured the trifecta of Don, Chris Vogler, and TKZ’s own Jim Bell. I’d love to see those guys get the band back together again. Anyone else at TKZ in favor of a reunion concert?

~~~

Linda Hurtado Bond, Debbie Burke

On Saturday, I met Linda Hurtado Bond, an Emmy-winning 30-year veteran TV reporter in Tampa who’s also written six thrillers. Her latest book is All the Captive Girls set during Gasparilla, an annual Mardi Gras-style festival that celebrates pirates, drinking, pirate ships, drinking, pirate parades, drinking, pirate costumes…you get the idea.

She talked about how she had parlayed Gasparilla events into video promotions on her social media. Videos included her visit behind the scenes at the barn where parade floats are stored; a local bar/restaurant off the main drag that partnered with her to give visibility to both the business and her book; Linda’s Jeep decorated with lights driving in the parade while she, in a pirate costume, handed out beads to the crowd.

She acknowledges most introverted writers aren’t as extraverted as she is, nor do they have her recognizability from TV. Even so she advises authors to “Just be there” at community events because you never know what opportunities you might discover.

She recommends visiting bookstores, attending arts-related fairs, connecting with book clubs and book podcasters. To build your email list, do joint promotions with another author or a local business. Have something to offer—your expertise and willingness to answer questions; ARCs (advance reader copies); a book box with swag. As a breast cancer survivor, Linda participated in a fundraiser with her books as prizes.

Ask what you can do for the reader or audience. In other words, promotion is not about you, it’s about them and what they want, need, or enjoy.

I WANT to find out what high-octane vitamins Linda takes.

~~~

Sheree Greer and Debbie Burke

Sheree L. Greer is a Tampa-based author of fiction and creative nonfiction, as well as a business consultant, writing instructor, developmental editor, and new mom. She proudly showed phone photos of her bright-eyed, two-month-old little girl. She also admitted to new-baby exhaustion. However, not a trace of fatigue showed in Sheree’s vibrant presentation.

Sheree displayed a slide of two intersecting circles. One circle was want, the other was need. The oval where they overlapped was desire. Desire is the combination of wanting and needing something. She suggested a prompt to write about something you wanted or needed but didn’t get.

At age 35, Sheree’s need to stay sober intersected with her want to learn more about her past. That led to a desire to connect with her father. During their meeting he talked about his struggle with alcoholism. When she mentioned her age, he responded, “I was thirty-five when you were born.” At that moment, the common denominators of age and alcoholism linked them. She got to know herself through getting to know her father.

More prompts included creating a desire list for your character. Discover if the character shares her desires or hides them.

Three additional questions:

  1. At the start of your story, who knows about her desire?
  2. By the middle of your story, who knows about her desire?
  3. By the end, who knows about her desire?

Considering the character’s desire in that light was a fresh concept to me. It went beyond the usual questions about story stakes like what happens if a character fails, or what happens if they succeed?

Sheree also talked about interiority or the inner thoughts of a character. If a character is alone and thinking about themselves for too long, readers lose interest. Instead, she suggests focusing on the tension between the character’s inner wants/needs in contrast with the external happenings of the scene.

I DESIRE more insights like Sheree’s to lift my writing to the next level.

~~~

 

Janice Hardy, Sheree L. Greer, Debbie Burke, Eileen McIntyre

Janice Hardy runs Fiction University, an educational site she founded in 2009 that’s crammed with practical, actionable advice on writing. Her talk also focused on character’s wants and needs but from a different perspective. She says, “When want and need pull in opposite directions, the story gets interesting.”

She defines want as what the character thinks will make her happy; need is what will really make her happy. “Impossible desire” is the empty hole in a character’s soul.

When faced with a saggy middle, Janice suggests this is the place in the story to go deeper rather than wider. By wider, she means adding more activity. Deeper is where the author should force the character to make hard choices. Every choice must cause consequences in the plot.

The middle can feature false victories, where the character believes they’re making progress toward a goal but aren’t. Another possibility for the middle is false failure, where they believe they’ve failed but later discover the failure actually leads to success.

Janice recalled a conference when she experienced severe imposter syndrome. She was the unknown newbie on a panel with Lee Child and Maya Angelou. Janice understandably felt awkward and didn’t know what to say. Then those two luminaries admitted they also struggled with self-doubt at the start of each book. At that point, Janice realized self-doubt is normal for authors no matter how accomplished.

Janice is the author of a series of writing craft books. She’s also a meticulous, organized plotter, the polar opposite of my pantsing chaos.

I NEED to clean up my act, so I bought Janice’s book Planning Your Novel-Ideas and Structure.

~~~

Legends Christopher Vogler and Donald Maass

In the mid-1980s, Chris Vogler wrote a seven-page memo that famously blew through Hollywood like a Florida hurricane. The memo grew into the classic textbook for screenwriting and storytelling, The Writer’s Journey – Mythic Structure for Writers. The book has remained a perennial bestseller, including a 25th anniversary edition in 2020, and is still going strong.

Meeting Chris in person was the numero uno reason I attended the conference. My upcoming craft-of-writing book, The Villain’s Journey – How to Create Villains Readers Love to Hate, is the flip side to the Hero’s Journey which Chris explores in depth in The Writer’s Journey.

True confession time: Although Chris and I had previously exchanged friendly emails, I was intimidated about meeting him in person. During the lunch break, I even had to call a friend for support. She told me to get my sorry cowardly ass into the room and introduce myself.

Well…I did.

Chris was warm, friendly, down to earth, and not at all intimidating. We chatted about my book, and he could not have been more gracious, encouraging, and supportive.

In his Sunday presentation, Chris explained archetypes are stereotypes but deeper. He talked about impressions on cave walls made by prehistoric people who had a deep need to leave their mark, to say I had a life, I was here.

He showed a slide with two sets of ancient footprints that had been preserved under ash for thousands of years. One set was large and one small, probably a mother and child running through mud while fleeing a volcanic eruption. They had left their mark for a roomful of writers who, centuries later, were still moved by their plight.

That illustrated the universality and timeless power of stories.

Chris introduced us to a collection of lesser-known Greek gods, along with their family lineage. Each was the personification of a particular quality or theme.

One example was Arete. Her mother was the goddess of justice and her father the god of safety and security. Those qualities blended in Arete who embodied grace, virtue, excellence, and perfection. Arete’s evil twin sister was Cacia (Kakia) who embodied vice and immorality.

Chris then displayed a slide of a related myth. In the historic line drawing, young Hercules is shown at a crossroads where he encounters two beautiful women. “Cacia” points at the easy road going downhill toward quick material riches. “Arete” points at the other road which goes uphill through difficulties but ultimately leads to immortality by leaving a lasting mark on the world.

The character at a crossroads who must make a choice remains a relatable theme that today’s characters still face.

The goddess Themis (notice the similarity to “theme”) established the laws of the universe. Her daughter Dike laid out the laws of the world and human life—the moral code. Dike’s evil twin sister was Adikia, goddess of injustice and wrongdoing.

Today’s characters still face dilemmas of right and wrong.

Agon is the god of struggle. His name is also the root of the words “agony,” “protagonist,” and “antagonist.” Still relevant and relatable in today’s stories.

Chris presented more gods and goddesses, too many to include in this already-long post. At the end of his talk, I asked him if he was going to write a book based on his presentation. He smiled and said, “I already have.” The manuscript is near completion.

When it’s published, I NEED and WANT to read it.

~~~

One last shoutout to Lorin Oberweger and her team who brought together a 360-degree world of vision, talent, and knowledge. A big thank you for a fabulous, memorable conference! My head is still spinning.

~~~

TKZers, have you been to a conference that made a lasting impact on your writing? Please share that experience.

~~~

 

Please check out my upcoming book The Villain’s Journey-How to Create Villains Readers Love to Hate. Preorder now at this link and the ebook will be delivered to your device on July 13, 2025.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Fond Memories of Joe Hartlaub

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by Debbie Burke

Over the weekend, I received a punch-in-the-gut email. Joe Hartlaub, longtime TKZ contributor, had passed away suddenly and unexpectedly during a heart procedure.

Joe had been a beloved member of TKZ’s crew, going way back to 2010. His stories were always witty, wise, and warm. While reading his posts, my computer screen suffered many coffee snorts from his killer sense of humor.

He made fun of himself but not of others.

I hope he’s chuckling at today’s tribute to him because I used both “suddenly” and “unexpectedly”, which came to mind after reading his 2020 post about the sudden, unexpected death of a friend.

Joe wrote about anything and everything and we eagerly read his stories, recollections, observations, and insights. He wrote about:

Fats Domino;

Pizza;

His beloved granddaughter;

A feral cat;

Alcoholism;

When his neighbor was murdered.

He wrote about writing, books, movies, and music.

In going back through his posts, I found many first page critiques where his comments clearly but diplomatically explained what the anonymous author needed to do to improve the submission.

One first page critique from 2017 stayed close to my heart cuz it was mine. Joe’s gentle suggestions were mixed with praise that gave me hope my work might someday be published. His encouragement kept me going through many disappointments and setbacks.

Joe said goodbye to TKZ in 2021 with this post and more than a few tears were shed by readers.

This 2020 post is how I want to remember Joe.

RIP, Sweet Joseph.

True Crime Thursday – Unsolved Murders Linked to Freeway Killer, Now 80

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Photo credit – John Snape Wikimedia.com CCA SA 3.0

by Debbie Burke

@burke_writer

From 1972 to 1983 in southern California, bodies of young male hitchhikers were being dumped near freeways, on beaches, and in parking lots. Many had lethal levels of alcohol and drugs in their systems, and had been tortured, mutilated, sexually assaulted, and strangled.

The so-called “Freeway Killer” eluded law enforcement because of the difficulty of linking the murders with no witnesses and little evidence.

In 1977, Patrick Kearney turned himself into the Riverside County Sheriff’s Office and confessed to more than 30 murders. He was given 21 life sentences. The public breathed a sigh of relief that the Freeway Killer had been stopped.

But murders continued.

In 1980, William Bonin was arrested when police found him inside his van, raping a handcuffed 17-year-old runaway boy. A scrapbook detailing numerous murders was found in his glovebox. Blood and other evidence led to a confession to more than 20 murders, some with the help of accomplices.

Despite multiple prior convictions for sexual assaults on minor boys, Bonin had repeatedly been released from custody. At those times he was deemed no longer a risk to society.

At trial, he was convicted of 10 murders and sentenced to death. Another trial in a different jurisdiction resulted in conviction and death sentences for four additional murders. Again, the public was relieved that the Freeway Killer had been caught.

But murders continued.

In 1983, California Highway Patrol officers pulled over a car for driving erratically. Randy Steven Kraft stumbled out with a bottle of beer and his pants unzipped.

Inside the car officers found the body of a Marine with his pants pulled down. He’d been strangled and sexually assaulted. In the trunk they found a binder with more than 60 coded entries that corresponded to murders Kraft had apparently committed. Evidence also included Polaroids of strangled, bound young men who appeared unconscious or dead.

This Freeway Killer was additionally dubbed the Scorecard Killer because of the binder full of notations about his victims.

Although Kraft never confessed, the evidence against him was overwhelming. He appeared to enjoy the attention at trial and his case dragged on for many months, costing $10 million, the costliest criminal case in Orange County at the time. He was convicted of 16 murders and sentenced to death. Additional murders in Oregon and Michigan were linked to him since he had traveled for work to those states when more bodies, violated in similar ways, had been found.

Kraft is now 80 and back in the news because DNA finally identified the remains of a body found near I-5 in Oregon back in 1980.

Larry Eugene Parks was a 30-year-old Vietnam veteran at the time of his death. His family had lost touch with him. Another dead man, Marine Corporal Michael O’Fallon, had been found in a nearby location a day before. Investigators believed the two murders were connected but couldn’t prove it and the cases went cold.

According to a USA Today story from  May 12, 2025:

Last year, an Orange County Sheriff’s Department investigator contacted the Oregon State Police’s cold case unit, offering to help identify Parks’ remains with the use of forensic genealogy. Possible family members were contacted and submitted DNA samples for comparison, leading to Parks’ definitive identification.

Similarly, in October 2023, Orange County investigators used the technology to identity Michael Ray Schlicht of Cedar Rapids, Iowa, whose body was found in 1974 in unincorporated Laguna Hills, now the city of Aliso Viejo, California. Detectives are likewise working to determine whether Kraft is linked to Schlicht’s death.

This L.A. Times article from November, 2023 describes Schlicht’s identification also by forensic DNA.

Per this May 9, 2025 AP story, Oregon State Police spokesperson Kyle Kennedy says about Parks:

“There’s some evidence that we’re processing to determine that link [to Randy Kraft],” Kennedy said. “We are very confident that we have the correct person of interest.”

In the 1970s and 80s, three different serial murderers, each called the Freeway Killer, terrorized California.

Patrick Kearney, 85, remains incarcerated at Mule Creek State Prison in Ione, CA.

William Bonin was executed by lethal injection in 1996.

Randy Kraft, 80, received a death sentence that was not carried out. The last execution in California happened in 2006. Kraft remains in prison at San Quentin Rehabilitation Center.

~~~

Thank you to TKZ regular Kathy Ferguson who brought the story to my attention.

~~~

Serial killers are covered in Debbie Burke’s new book The Villain’s Journey – How to Create Villains Readers Love to Hate. 

Publication date July 13, 2025.

Preorder link

Are You Ready for AI Agatha?

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by Debbie Burke

@burke_writer

Following up on Jim Bell’s discussion of Agatha Christie from Sunday…

The headline in the May 16, 2025 Saturday Evening Post read:

AI AGATHA CHRISTIE WILL TEACH YOU HOW TO WRITE! 

I can’t express my initial reaction because this is a G-rated blog. Suffice it to say, I was gobsmacked, horrified, and disappointed. Taking advantage of the deceased by commercializing and monetizing their image seems disrespectful when the person is no longer around to object. But that’s just me.

The idea of bringing dead people back to life using AI is also creepy but weirdly fascinating. Some music videos of contemporary, living singers performing duets with dead legends have been done quite well.

My fave is the 1989 video of “There’s a Tear in My Beer” with Hank Williams, Jr. playing alongside Hank Sr. who died when his son was only three. That gave this performance special poignance, imagining what might have been if Senior hadn’t died at age 29.

But AI has come a long way since 1989, with deepfakes and phony impersonations. Nothing is sacred anymore. And people will go to any outrageous lengths to make a buck.

The Agatha headline conjured up a TikTok-style, faux-historical bastardization of her image, dancing as she typed on her antique manual typewriter in time to “Puttin’ on the Ritz.”

To my surprise, the video excerpt wasn’t awful and was quite interesting. Dame Agatha’s great-grandson and the Christie estate kept a firm grip on the production, ensuring a tasteful, authentic representation of her. The script used her own words from her writings about her storytelling techniques. No one put words in her–uh, its–mouth. Instead of reading her advice in books, writers can listen to the resurrected author speaking.

The video lasts about 10 minutes but only a few seconds show AI Agatha in action. The majority of the time is spent describing the process that the producers, directors, lighting techs, hairdressers, costumers, and others went through to give an accurate depiction. A human actress combined with AI resulted in an animated life-like Agatha.

Here’s the video:

The AI Agatha course is sold via the BBC Maestro program. It can be purchased by single episode or subscription. The description is at this link.

I’m interested to hear what TKZers think of this revolutionary concept. Please share your opinions in the comments.

~~~

 

Join Debbie Burke on The Villain’s Journey – How to Create Villains Readers Love to Hate. Follow the steps to the darkest depths of the soul…if you dare!

Preorder now at this link to have The Villain’s Journey delivered to your device on July 13, 2025.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

First Page Critique – A New Day to Tell a Lie

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by Debbie Burke

@burke_writer

Here’s a first page from another Brave Author with the intriguing title: A New Day to Tell a Lie. Please read and we’ll discuss.

 

September 11, 2001, at 7:20 AM, was a pivotal moment in history. Nineteen men boarded Flights 11, 175, 77, and 93, setting in motion a series of events that would change the world and the people in it forever.

Roman Stark strolls through the beautiful, original brass and glass doors of 890 Park Avenue, located in the elegant Upper East Side. As he steps into the bright morning of a New York City day, he feels the city’s vibrant energy wrap around him, reminding him of that hopeful saying, ‘If you can make it here, you can make it anywhere’—a comforting thought he really needs today.

As he enjoys the morning sun, his thoughts drift back to that surprising moment a month ago when Elle slapped him. Their relationship, much like others he’s experienced, is a complicated blend of surprises and discoveries. He saw a side of her he had never encountered before, and he now grasped what her father alluded to when he suggested that a certain kind of ‘crazy’ was part of her mother’s lineage.

Roman made a significant life-altering change by leaving the beautiful home he once shared with his wife in Upper Montclair, New Jersey. He moved to a spacious six-bedroom co-op owned by his uncle, located just 18 miles away in ‘the city.’ Uncle Elliot’s tall and charming nephew always radiated confidence and charm during his visits, and he had been his uncle’s sole guest for several years. Imagine them enjoying brandy by the warm fire in the study, with Roman attentively listening to his uncle’s lengthy tales following delightful late-night dinners. His commitment and patience truly paid off as he received the keys to the apartment, along with an unused parking space in the garage. Most importantly, he accomplished his primary objective: obtaining a substantial amount to launch his exciting new venture, Stark Air.

When his uncle passed away, it turned out that no one in the private, ultra-secure building could quite remember what the mysterious Elliot Draper looked like. As a result, assuming his identity became rather straightforward. During the reading of Uncle Elliot’s will, he made it clear that his nephew was to repay every single penny to his estate. It was an intriguing twist for those who ever borrowed from him, as he delighted in ‘surprising’ them with unexpected conditions and interest in his seemingly generous gifts. In a surprising turn of events, an 87-year-old man cleverly outsmarted him, adding this latest disappointment to the long list of emotional and financial challenges that Roman already had to face.

~~~

Brave Author, the title caught my interest right away. It promises intrigue, deception, and secrets to be revealed, exactly the effect a title should have on a potential reader. Good job.

The first paragraph of detailed description of 9/11 is evidently intended to foreshadow what’s coming in the book but it didn’t work as written. Too many specifics were distracting, like the exact time and flight numbers. Additionally, the last sentence is a general statement that most people are well aware of so it doesn’t need to be spelled out.

One other problem is the lack of transition into the story. There is no hint of why 9/11 connects to a man walking out of an opulent NYC building into the sunshine.

Depending on how closely 9/11 relates to the story, here’s an alternative suggestion: Delete the first paragraph and instead maybe start with something along these lines:

On the sunny morning of September 10, 2001, Roman Stark strolls through the doors of….

That could establish a date that readers understand—the last day of normalcy before the catastrophic attack. But that may not be relevant to your story.

 

The initial paragraph introduces the main character and is told from his point of view (POV). It establishes location, weather, a possible theme, and ends with a good teaser “—a comforting thought he really needs today.” So far so good.

Then the rest of the page turns into a confusing backstory dump describing a disjointed string of events that jump back and forth in time.

A sunny NYC morning with musings about broken relationships, including a provocative statement by an apparent former father-in-law.

Then Roman’s life-changing move out of a home and marriage into a spacious apartment his uncle owns, then a point-of-view break where the narrator describes Roman, then a jump several years farther back in time, then another intrusion by the narrator who directly addresses the reader: “Imagine them enjoying brandy by the warm fire in the study, with Roman attentively listening to his uncle’s lengthy tales following delightful late-night dinners.”

Finally, a hint that Roman has charmed and probably conned the uncle into giving him the apartment, a parking space, and apparently seed money to launch Stark Air.

I may be really stretching here but does his airline business somehow relate to 9/11?

Roman’s goals are achieved but, at this point, it isn’t clear if Roman has apartment keys and is living there while the uncle is still alive.

Another jump back in time to when the uncle dies.

I’m further confused about when Roman actually moves in and when he assumes his uncle’s identity. Since the neighbors haven’t seen the uncle in years, that’s a cool development that makes the reader curious. But needs to be explained more clearly.

But then there’s another time jump to the reading of the uncle’s will that contains a big surprise for Roman. He’s supposed to pay back what appeared to be his inheritance. Apparently in the past (another time jump) the uncle had a pattern of giving gifts to other people but then surprising them by expecting repayment.

Now I’m totally confused. Was the apartment a gift before the uncle’s death? Was Roman posing as the uncle while the uncle was still alive? Or after death when the estate is being settled? Does the impersonation happen because Roman learns about unexpected debt from the will? Who’s the beneficiary of the estate?

If Roman is passing himself off as the uncle after the reading of the will, isn’t the actual beneficiary going to catch on pretty fast?

Notice the italics of apparent and appeared numerous times. That’s because I had to draw conclusions from events and actions that weren’t clearly connected.

Brave Author, the concept has a lot of promise. The main character appears to be a sleazy opportunist with unrealistic dreams who’s stunned when he must repay what he believed was a gift. And he’s impersonating a dead man. The situation is rich with potential complications.

But the confusing explanation of events during his morning walk indicates a serious problem with where the story starts.

There’s also inconsistency in the style. Sometimes it’s present tense, sometimes past. Sometimes the POV appears to be Roman’s. Other times there’s authorial intrusion. His disjointed thoughts swing from hopeful elation to irrelevant philosophizing to satisfaction with his own cunning to shock that his 87-year-old uncle outfoxed him to realization of his personal and financial problems. All this happens while he’s cheerfully strolling in the sunshine, deluding himself into thinking he can be a success in NYC.

Try taking a step back and ask yourself two questions:

WHAT info does the reader need to know?

WHEN do they need to know it?

Does the reader need a detailed description of 9/11 at the very beginning? Probably not.

Does the reader need to know Roman has problems and needs to give himself a pep talk? Yes.

How about that his wife slapped him a month ago? Probably yes since that caused him to move out of their home.

His musings of other past relationships that apparently failed, as well as the comments by his (presumably former) father-in-law about the mother’s “craziness” passed down to the daughter? Not needed at this point.

Does the reader need to know he moved into his uncle’s luxury apartment? Yes.

Big unanswered question: is the uncle alive or dead at this point?

Specific descriptive details about Roman’s former home? Not needed now.

The relationship with the wealthy but socially isolated uncle and his age (87)? Definitely needed.

The apparent grooming Roman does over several years to ingratiate himself with the uncle? Definitely, but delete the “Imagine” authorial intrusion. Save details like cozy fire and late dinners for later.

Roman’s goals to inherit a luxury apartment and seed money to start Stark Air? Definitely needed.

The apparent achievement of those goals? Yes.

The nasty surprise that the uncle’s “gifts” are in fact loans? Oh yes!

What about the backstory that uncle has apparently misled other people with “gifts” that have strings attached? Probably not now but necessary later.

Several other big questions that need to be answered: How did the uncle die? Natural causes? If he died at home, presumably neighbors who hadn’t seen him in years would have noticed his body being removed. If so, how does Roman pull off the impersonation?

The impersonation of the uncle? Absolutely needed but clarify the timeline. Does this happen before or after Roman learns he’s in debt?

After answering the questions, clarifying the timeline, and deleting unnecessary clutter, where should the story start?

Unless Roman is about to walk into the 9/11 explosions, I don’t think a sunny stroll while musing about the past is a good beginning.

One alternative idea: What if you introduce Roman by summarizing the past few years that he’s spent grooming his wealthy, socially isolated, 87-year-old Uncle Elliot? Roman’s goals are to inherit the luxury NYC apartment and obtain funds for his dream of starting the Stark Air business. When Uncle Elliot dies, Roman is feeling confident about his future as he’s sitting in the attorney’s office for the reading of the will.

Then the attorney drops the bomb. What Roman believed was his inheritance are actually loans that need to be repaid. And that someone else is the beneficiary of the estate. Or there are other daunting conditions Roman must meet to become the beneficiary. Or whatever other complications you can think of to turn his dreams into disaster.

How can he solve the immediate problem?

He decides to impersonate his uncle and live in the apartment. Meanwhile, though, he must figure out a plan to start a new day to tell a lie.

Thanks for submitting this page, Brave Author. With some clarification and rearrangement, you should have a compelling novel of intrigue.

~~~

TKZers, do you have suggestions for the Brave Author? Please share in the comments.

~~~

 

 

The Villain’s Journey – How to Create Villains Readers Love to Hate by Debbie Burke will be published July 13, 2025.

Preorder now at this link.

True Crime Thursday – Cybercrime Then and Now

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Public domain

by Debbie Burke

@burke_writer

Cybercrime continues to expand globally with costs estimated to reach more than $10 trillion. That’s trillion with a T.

At the turn of this century, cyberattacks affected relatively few individuals. From 2001 to 2017, statistical charts showed a gradual increase. Between 2018 and 2020, cybercrime numbers shot up like a rocket. Since then, the rise maintains a nearly vertical trajectory.

Take a look at this chart by Statistica.com.

According to Keepnetlabs.com, cyberattacks occur every 39 seconds, with ransomware incidents happening every 11 seconds.

I first wrote about cybercrime, hackers, and deepfakes back in 2019, imagining how AI could be misused in the future. Early on, attacks were often pranks, like that naked guy who crashes a Zoom meeting.

During Covid, people were stuck home with nothing to do. Idle hands are the devil’s workshop. Cybercrime blossomed into a major industry. Since then, with AI advances, it’s exploded beyond all imagination. I’ve written about various forms here, here, and here.  

Here are four updates on cyberscams:

  1. Social media cloning continues to be a growing problem, according to attorney Steve Weisman who writes the great informational site, Scamicide.

Almost a decade ago, cloning happened to me on Facebook. I’d developed a small but loyal following on FB, including readers from all over the US, Canada, UK, Australia, and Japan. Then someone cloned my identity. At the time I didn’t even know what the term “cloning” meant.

Cloning is a process by which a bad actor takes over your social media handle, creates a new account using your same name, information, photo, etc. and pretends to be you. They usually send out new friend “requests” to your contacts. Anyone who accepts the request is now caught in the bad actor’s web.

My FB friends received strange messages supposedly from me. I learned about it after several emailed me, asking if I was in Spain and needed bail money. Uh, no. When I tried to access my account, it was blocked. Nor could I contact FB for help. A brilliant astrophysicist friend figured out what happened and contacted them on my behalf.

Many hours of work later, things were back to normal, with newly adjusted stringent privacy settings. But why did fixing the problem require help from a friend with a Harvard PhD?

Some months later, my account was cloned again. At that point, I decided if FB’s security was that lax, and reporting a problem was so difficult, I didn’t need the headaches. I closed my account, unfortunately losing contact with valued readers.

Back then, FB was reluctant to acknowledge the problem and made it nearly impossible to report. I figured maybe my case was an unusual occurrence.

Wrong.

Now, according to Steve, FB/Meta admits to “as many as 60 million phony cloned Facebook accounts including hundreds of its founder Mark Zuckerberg.”

Cloning happens across all social media platforms, and is especially pervasive when they’re interconnected with each other, like FB and Instagram. Criminals are happy to exploit any opportunity to reach thousands, if not millions, of people with a few clicks. Cloning is only one of many ways they victimize users of social media. That topic could fill up a whole ‘nother post.

2. Smishing scams – According to Steve Weisman’s new post, smishing is defined as:

…Text messages that lure you into clicking on links or providing personal information in response to a text message from what appears to be a trusted source, such as a company with which you do business.

Steve’s post says the FTC warns of a huge uptick in smishing that cost $470 million in the past year. Text messages often appear to come from Amazon, FedEx, USPS, Cash App, Netflix, banks, etc.

A new twist is: 

Making matters worse, scammers are able to use bots to send thousands of smishing text messages in a matter of seconds and while many phones have anti-spam filters to recognize repetitive text patterns used by scammers, scammers are able to use AI to create slight variations of their smishing text messages to avoid detection.

 

Every week, I receive smishing messages supposedly from my bank, warning of suspicious activity in my account. 

Phony messages from Fedex and the post office claim there’s a problem with a delivery and tell you to click on this link. Don’t do it!

And speaking of the post office…

3. Account hacking – Here’s a weird crime twist that recently happened to me.

For years, I’ve used usps.com to preprint and prepay postage for priority mail labels. During extended absences from home, I preprint labels for the friend who forwards first class mail to us once a week at a Florida address.

Around the 2024 holidays, our forwarded mail didn’t arrive in Florida. Tracking showed a circuitous route that ended with the vague message “in transit.” We visited the local Florida post office. The clerk said a bin of mail had gone missing. “It happens all the time. It’ll eventually turn up.”

How reassuring since our envelope contained bills that needed to be paid now.

After more trips to the post office, we learned the envelope had been “returned to sender” to our address in Montana.

What???

The mailing label was totally correct since it had been officially printed by the post office. So why wasn’t it delivered?

Meanwhile, our friend sent another batch of mail to Florida using another preprinted label. But when I checked tracking, it showed that envelope had been delivered to an address in Maryland.

What???

Back to the Florida post office. The same helpful clerk ran the tracking number through his computer. Yup, his also showed delivery to Maryland. Then he disappeared in the back processing room. Fifteen minutes later, he came out with our envelope. Even though tracking showed delivery to Maryland, here it was in Florida where it was supposed to be.

Something smelled fishy.

Since our friend in Montana still had several preprinted labels that had not been used, I checked the tracking numbers for those. Incredibly, all showed as already delivered to addresses around the country—New York, Georgia, California, etc.

What???

Back to the post office to show this evidence to the same long-suffering clerk (who was now our new best pal). He called fraud/security and dug deeper. After nearly an hour of research, he suspected someone had hacked into our usps.com account. He recommended changing the password, which I did.

Fortunately, no one had accessed the VISA card I used to pay for the postage.

The plot thickens.

Turns out this is a regular racket. Clever thieves hack into usps.com user accounts, and steal labels that have already been paid for but not yet used. They reprint the labels with the same tracking bar code but a different address. They then use those fraudulent labels to ship merchandise (usually stolen) to customers of their own shady businesses.

Selling stolen merchandise and shipping it with stolen postage equals zero expenses and 100% profit for crooked operators. Our post office pal gave the thieves a grudging compliment: “These guys are very good.”

A clear case of postal fraud, likely an inside job. Most of the bogus labels had been routed through the post office’s Bethesda, MD distribution center. If I were a detective, I’d start my investigation in Bethesda. Hint, hint.

Did fraud/security ever follow up? Dunno. Our PO pal never heard another word. Will anyone ever get caught or prosecuted? Unlikely.The advantage for cybercriminals is they are nearly impossible to track. 

4. Impersonation scams – For years, scammers have posed as government agencies and law enforcement. They contact victims by phone, email, text, or social media with bogus claims you owe fines and/or back taxes that must be paid immediately or else you’ll be arrested. But because they are such generous, caring folks, they’ll make your problem go away if you pay them with cryptocurrency, gift cards, wire transfers, or other untraceable funds. 

This morning, I received a public service announcement from the FBI warning of scammers who pose as representatives of the FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3) who claim they recovered money you’d been previously scammed out of. They will return that lost money to you…you guessed it…for a fee, payable by cryptocurrency, gift cards, wire transfers, or other untraceable funds. 

Yup, the cybercrime situation has gotten so out of control that the FBI’s IC3 division has to issue PSAs about their own department being impersonated. Talk about irony.

Back in 2000, we wondered IF we might ever be victims of this mysterious new method of crime.

Now it’s a certainty and the only question is WHEN? 

A sad fact of life in the 21st century.

~~~

Now that I’ve spoiled your day, it’s your turn, TKZers.

Share your personal experience with cybercrime. Any brilliant suggestions to block criminals? Do you have favorite security software?

~~~

Coming July 2025! Debbie Burke’s new writing craft guide:

The Villian’s Journey ~ How to Create Villains Readers Love to Hate

For more details, please click here. No, this link won’t ask for cryptocurrency, gift crads, or wire transfers!

Villains vs. Antagonists

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by Debbie Burke

@burke_writer

 (This post is excerpted from my upcoming craft book, The Villain’s Journey ~ How to Create Villains Readers Love to Hate)

What is the difference between a villain and an antagonist? This question confuses many writers.

In the simplest terms: Villains are antagonists, but antagonists are not necessarily villains.

Antagonists don’t have to be bad guys with evil or malicious intent. They simply stand between the hero and the hero’s quest. They are obstacles the hero must overcome to achieve a goal.

Every genre needs antagonists. Without them, a story falls flat for lack of conflict.

Photo credit: public domain

The antagonist can be:

  • A rival (two suitors vying for the same lover)
  • An opponent (two sports teams fighting for a championship)
  • A competitor (Microsoft vs. Apple)
  • A situation or event (earthquake, volcanic eruption, hurricane, flood, wildfire, pandemic, war)
  • Self-doubt inside the hero.

Here are a few examples of antagonists that don’t have malicious intent.

  • In Ernest Hemingway’s The Old Man and the Sea, sharks strip the meat from Santiago’s magnificent marlin. They are hungry, not evil.
  • In Charlotte’s Web by E.B. White, Fern’s father isn’t being mean when he picks up an axe to dispatch a runt piglet. He’s a farmer trying to provide for his family.
  • In Sylvester Stallone’s film Rocky, Apollo Creed isn’t wicked. He’s a boxing champ protecting his title against underdog Rocky Balboa. In fact, the two opponents later become friends.

Various Genre Examples of Antagonists:

Romance needs someone or something that keeps the lovers apart.

  • In Romeo and Juliet, parents forbid the lovers from seeing each other.
  • In Casablanca, Rick, Ilsa, and Victor grapple with conflicts of love, loyalty, and duty during war.

Fiction for young readers often teaches life lessons like how to recover from failure, survive family breakups, or develop self-confidence.

  • Diary of a Wimpy Kid series by Jeff Kinney spans 19 books about middle-schooler Greg Heffley who suffers bullying, struggles with adolescence, and endures the trials of growing up.
  • Harry Potter begins as a powerless, downtrodden orphan. Through seven books, he discovers and develops his powers as a wizard, using his growing knowledge and strength to vanquish foes and come to terms with death.

Charles Dickens – public domain

Historical fiction captures the conflicts of a particular era.

  • Charles Dickens’s novels address social/political issues like children’s rights (Oliver Twist), revolution (Tale of Two Cities), and judicial reform (Bleak House).
  • John Steinbeck’s novels like Grapes of Wrath and Cannery Row spotlight the effects of the Great Depression.
  • In Winds of War and War and Remembrance, Herman Wouk shows families caught in peril during World War II.

Mainstream fiction is an umbrella term for stories that explore the struggles of the human condition:

  • To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
  • Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen
  • The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold (features rape and murder therefore could also be considered crime fiction)

Photo credit: NASA

Science Fiction and Fantasy showcase imaginary worlds with unfamiliar, antagonistic  landscapes characters must navigate.

  • J.R.R. Tolkien explores Middle Earth.
  • Harry Potter studies at the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.
  • Star Trek and Star Wars “go where no man [or woman] has gone before.”

A major challenge for writers is how to characterize a villain without resorting to two-dimensional stereotypes. Snidely Whiplash is fun in cartoons but not all that interesting to crime fiction readers.

Snidely Whiplash

Try reframing the way you look at your villains. Instead of seeing them as evil, think of them first as antagonists. Climb into their skin and see the situation from their point of view.

Most villains feel their behavior, however horrible, is justified. Their reasoning may not make sense to you or me but, to them, it does. They view the hero as a rival, opponent, or competitor who threatens them or stands in the way of what they want or need.

Numerous authors have said, “The villain is the hero of their own story.”

Author Chris Colfer says, “The villain is a victim whose story hasn’t been told.”

Summing up:

Stories require conflict.

Antagonists provide that conflict.

All stories need an antagonist. Not all stories need a villain.

Villains are antagonists, but antagonists are not necessarily villains.

~~~

TKZers: Does your current work in progress have an antagonist or a villain?

As a reader, what do you prefer? Stories with a clearcut villain to boo? Or stories with antagonists who are more difficult to pin down? Or another variation?

~~~

Want to learn more about Debbie Burke’s upcoming book? Click the title for details about The Villain’s Journey ~ How to Create Villains Readers Love to Hate.

Can AI Be Funny?

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by Debbie Burke

@burke_writer

Sue Coletta reported in her recent post that copyrighted work has been stolen to train generative-AI models, causing outrage from authors and other creators.

In other words, don’t expect Mark Zuckerberg to be invited as the keynote at an Authors Guild banquet.

But, I thought, at least one skill can’t possibly be done by AI: writing humor.

(Some pre-AI examples below from Lexophile collections.)

Humor depends heavily on:

Circumstances: When smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A.

Context: If you don’t pay your exorcist, you can get repossessed.

Juxtaposition: A will is a dead giveaway.

Irony: I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

Incongruity: Police were summoned to a daycare center where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

Unexpected connections:  Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.

Timing: There are three problems with old age. First, your memory goes……….I can’t remember the other two.

Emotion: If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine.

Shared troubles: A lot of money is tainted. ‘Taint yours, and ‘taint mine.

AI could never understand these concepts, right? It can be taught to repeat jokes but can it ever be taught humor?

By now I figured someone must have tried to use AI to write humor. Down the research rabbit hole.

Milton Berle – public domain

 

 

Early versions of ChatGPT, GROK, Gemini, and others regurgitated jokes that were old back when Milton Berle stole them.

Then, like your annoying little brother, it repeats them ad nauseam.

 

 

Examples from Chat GPT 3:

What did the 5-year-old girl say when she asked for a pony? I guess I’ll take a unicow instead!

What did the fish say when it hit the wall? Dam! 

Examples from ChatGPT4.o:

Why did the AI cross the road? To optimize the chicken’s path.

Why did the AI go to art school? To learn how to draw its own conclusions.

Why did the computer go to the doctor? It was full of viruses.

Example from GROK:

Why was the computer cold? Because it left its Windows open!

Examples from Bing:

A little girl was asked by her teacher what she wanted to be when she grew up. She said, “I want to be a princess.” The teacher said, “That’s nice, but you know you have to work hard and study hard to be a princess, right?” The girl said, “No, I don’t. I just have to marry Harry.”

When prompted for a joke about politicians, Bing replied:

I’m sorry but I don’t make jokes about politicians. They can be sensitive and controversial topics for some people. I hope you understand.

That’s a joke, right? Turns out, weirdly, it’s not.

Examples from Gemini:

Two AI researchers are arguing about the best way to achieve artificial consciousness. One says, “We need to focus on replicating the human brain in all its complexity.” The other scoffs, “Nonsense! All we need is a massive dataset of cat videos and a really catchy jingle.”

Suddenly, a voice booms from the lab’s supercomputer, “Hey, guys! Can you make up your minds already? I’m trying to learn how to meme here!”

Only one joke generation system sounded remotely interesting. It’s called Witscript, an app developed by Joe Toplyn, a former writer for Leno and Letterman. He also authored a book Comedy Writing for Late-Night TV. in which he reverse-engineers the mechanics of creating jokes.

Toplyn is a Harvard grad in Engineering and Applied Physics, and has an MBA. He began studying a relatively new field called Computational Humor and figured researchers could feed his book’s reverse-engineering system into a computer to teach it humor. But progress was slow. In a 2024 interview, he says: “I decided if anybody was going to teach a computer to have a sense of humor, it was going to be me.” So he wrote the app himself.

Witscript offers different categories in which you enter a prompt.

Standup:

You input: Marriage is a lot like going to Costco.

Witscript responds: Because nothing says commitment like buying a year’s supply of toilet paper in bulk.

Captions for memes:

You input: What would a doctor in an examination room say to Mr. Potato Head?

Witscript responds: Looks like you need a little more than just some plastic surgery, Mr. Potato Head!

To liven speeches and articles:

You input: You may have heard that genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration.

Witscript responds: Well, I’m in luck then. My sweat glands are way more productive than my brain.

That one genuinely made me laugh.

Toplyn posts daily jokes written by Witscript on Twitter/X. Some are pretty good, others, meh.

Still, I found his approach different. He goes beyond typical internet scraping of jokes used my most AIs. Instead, he breaks down the mechanical structure of jokes and examines how the human brain connects the links among different elements to make up humor.

My recent TKZ post shows I’m not a fan of using AI for writing. The lack of ethics disturbs me, and environmental effects of data centers are chilling. But, like it or not, AI is here to stay.

Humor is supremely subjective. What I find funny makes you yawn. What leaves you rolling on the floor leaves me rolling my eyes.

From a human on Twitter: “I’ll worry about AI being funny when I hear it has a drug problem.”

So, TKZers, what do you think? Can a machine be taught humor? Will AI ever duplicate the rich emotional human experience that’s the foundation of humor?

~~~

 

All books in Debbie Burke’s Thrillers with Passion series are 100% human written. Learn more at this link.

True Crime Thursday – Innocent Behind Bars

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by Debbie Burke

@burke_writer

Since 2008, Buggz Ironman-Whitecow has been in a Montana prison for a homicide he did not commit. Racism against Native-Americans led to his arrest and prosecution. Evidence that should have cleared him was withheld or falsified as wrongdoers scrambled to cover up the truth.

Buggz had one stroke of good luck: he is represented by attorney Phyllis Quatman, a dogged advocate determined to free him.

Phyllis is my good friend and critique partner. I asked her to write a guest post about this case that is a true crime within the justice system.

Note: the crime scene photos are graphic and disturbing. For that reason they are not included in this post. They are available to view at this link.

Here’s Phyllis’s story:

WHAT’S WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE?

For 35 years, I’ve been an attorney who worked both as a prosecutor and defense lawyer. Evidence is the Holy Grail in criminal law and carries the day. A single photograph taken at a 2006 homicide scene is clear evidence that proves the innocence of my Native-American client, Buggz Ironman-Whitecow. Yet Buggz has been in prison since 2008.

Why?

I became his defense counsel five years after his 2008 conviction. My original job was to seek post-conviction relief for the excessive sentence of 65 years in a homicide with no pre-meditation and weak, questionable evidence. But investigation of that evidence led to a shocking conclusion that official negligence and misconduct had been covered up.

The victim was Lloyd “Lucky” Kvelstad, a poor white transient who, during a winter night when the temperature dropped to seven degrees, joined a group of Native Americans in a Havre, Montana ‘flop house’. Although the house had no heat, it served as a hangout for local substance abusers. A great deal of alcohol was consumed, and a fight broke out among several people there. .

At trial in 2008, prosecutors alleged Buggz had caused Lucky’s death during the fight.

At 1:20 a.m. on November 25, 2006, police and EMTs arrived on scene. Lucky was lying on the floor, face down, with head injuries. At trial, they admitted they never treated Lucky, never rolled him over, never tried to revive him, or even listen for breath. They announced he was dead and left.

The pathologist who performed Lucky’s autopsy testified the head injuries were not serious enough to have killed him. The pathologist also could not find a cause of death to a medical certainty.

Metadata on crime scene photos showed his body’s location and position were not the same as initial witnesses had stated and their diagrams showed. He had moved two feet forward after first responders left. This detail proved key.

Around 4:25 a.m., police video shows the officers rolling Lucky over. His body shows no lividity, no rigor mortis, and fresh urine on his thigh. One officer commented on the urine and the other officer said, “I wonder if this guy … didn’t die right away?” The video suddenly cuts away.

That last officer wrote in his report and testified that at 4:45 a.m. he bagged Lucky’s head with a brown paper bag and taped it around Lucky’s neck. He left the scene to go to the police department, then returned to the scene. At 5:15 a.m., someone called for the coroner. At 6 a.m., the coroner arrived and found … no lividity, little if any rigor mortis, and that Lucky’s arms were warm to the touch. He stated there was no bag on Lucky’s head which is how he could describe Lucky’s facial injuries.

Photo 42 was among 100 crime scene photos the prosecution had produced on a discovery CD back in January 2007.

Photo 42 provided my first clue that Buggz was innocent.

According to the police, it represents the first picture taken of Lucky at the crime scene and ostensibly depicts exactly how and where the officers found him just after 1:20 in the morning.

Metadata on that CD revealed suspicious discrepancies:

(1) While the police and EMTs arrived on scene around 1:20 a.m., no crime scene photos were taken until Photo 42 was shot at 3:47 a.m., more than two hours after those first responders arrived;

(2) Of those 100 photos, somebody duplicated eight of them, renamed them, and scattered those 16 replicas into the 100 disseminated to the defense just after the homicide;

(3) Somebody also added 23 photos at the beginning of that discovery CD, and the metadata showed they were taken between 9:18 and 9:38 a.m., more than nine hours after the police came on scene;

(4) Those 23 photos were a different size than the others and taken with a different camera.

In other words, all 100 photos on that discovery CD had been rearranged, renamed, or altered.

What happened to the ones that should have been there, like photos of Lucky lying in situ in his original position at 1:20 a.m., or ones an officer wrote he took at 2:38 a.m. in the kitchen?

Missing.

Photo 42 shows Lucky lying in a different location and position, the key detail noted above.

Years later when I took over Buggz’s case, Photo 42 triggered an alarm in my lawyer brain.

Dr. Gordon Giesbrecht, our renowned expert witness, concluded that Lucky was not dead when the cops left him alone on the floor, but likely hypothermic and drunk. That explained their inability to detect a pulse. He posited that Lucky arrived at his location in Photo 42 either because someone moved him there, or because he crawled forward two feet over a two-hour period. Since everyone agreed that no one moved or touched Lucky, and witnesses at the time swore Lucky was lying prone where they described and drew in their diagrams, it seemed like Photo 42 proved Lucky moved after the police and EMTs left him for dead.

Add to that the condition of his body on the crime scene video at 4:30 a.m. and the coroner’s findings at 6 a.m., and it seems clear Lucky didn’t die until much later than the 12:30 a.m. time of death the police alleged.

Indeed, Dr. Giesbrecht concluded that Lucky, had he been warmed up and treated, would have lived. But by failing to treat him, the EMTs and cops were negligent at best. When they inexplicably bagged his head at 4:45 a.m., they caused his death from hypoxia, or lack of oxygen.

Could their own exposure to civil and criminal liability cause these officers and EMTs to fabricate evidence from a crime scene and enact a massive coverup to divert attention away from their own guilt and toward Buggz Ironman-Whitecow?

I’ve spent the last 12 years, trying to get that damning evidence of a coverup before an unbiased judge. But that’s easier said than done. Montana is a large state with a small population where, in the legal and law enforcement world, everyone knows everyone. Officers and prosecutors involved in Buggz’s original homicide trial in 2008 moved up to higher positions of influence. Three became judges. The Attorney General at the time became Chief Justice on the Montana Supreme Court.

My repeated motions and requests for a new trial to present this evidence have been denied or ignored.

Meanwhile, Buggz has languished in prison for 18 years, yet has not lost faith that his innocence will be proved.

Thwarted by the legal system, I wrote the true crime memoir, Innocent Behind Bars-The True Story of Buggz Ironman-Whitecow, and created a website, The Free Buggz Project. All evidence is laid out in the website, including photos, crime scene video, trial and hearing transcripts, case files, and more.

My goal is to generate sufficient public interest and outcry that Buggz will receive a new trial. I invite you to review the evidence for yourself. If you conclude, as I did, that Lucky Kvelstad was not murdered by Buggz but died due to negligence and official misconduct, I ask your help in contacting independent agencies and courts to reverse this injustice.

Attorney Phyllis Quatman

Book sales link: Innocent Behind Bars-The True Story of Buggz Ironman-Whitecow.

Website link: freebuggzproject.com

Read more about author Phyllis Quatman.

~~~

Thank you, Phyllis!

TKZers, Phyllis is happy to answer questions in the comments.