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True Crime Thursday – Innocent Florida Woman Jailed Because of Flock Camera

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by Debbie Burke

Flock camera – Public Domain

Today’s story is a truly a crime. An innocent woman was jailed for 13 days because a Flock camera captured an image of her vehicle that just happened to be in the vicinity of a fatal traffic accident.

On the night of October 4, 2025, three people were killed in a chain reaction crash involving a motorcycle and multiple vehicles on Interstate 4 near the Volusia and Seminole county line in Florida. Because of dark road conditions and a semitruck that blocked views, witnesses who called 911 gave varied descriptions of an SUV or Dodge Durango, either black or maroon or white, driving erratically and swerving across lanes. One witness recalled a partial license plate number “458.”

No cameras recorded the actual accident. However, a Flock camera located three miles beyond the accident location captured a license plate of a black Dodge Durango owned by Lindsey Isaacs, 23. Her license plate did not have numbers “458.”

A Florida Highway Patrol corporal decided the Flock camera shot was enough reason to impound Ms. Isaac’s Durango, even though the vehicle had no visible damage other than what the corporal called a “smudge or rub marks.” The sworn affidavit submitted to the court can be read at this link.

Ms. Isaacs protested she had not been in an accident and had time-stamped receipts that proved her whereabouts that night. She had driven on that road but had already passed the location before the collision occurred.

Per a Fox news report by Kurt Knutsson, CyberGuy.com:

“The Flock camera hit was far from the only information investigators had. A 911 caller described a maroon Dodge Durango and provided part of its license plate number. Later, investigators also found red or maroon paint transfer on a Ford Focus involved in the crash.”

Yet Ms. Isaacs’s undamaged black Durango remained impounded for months.

Then on April 17, 2026, Lindsey Isaacs was arrested on three counts of vehicular homicide, plus numerous additional charges, and put in solitary confinement. Her initial bond hearing was denied.

She was finally released after spending a total of 13 days incarcerated.

On May 22, 2026, all charges against her were dropped.

Meanwhile, an investigation by Florida Highway Patrol’s Special Investigation and Reconstruction Team (SIRT) determined there were “discrepancies” in the initial report. Despite the sworn affidavit by the FHP corporal who impounded Lindsey Isaacs’s black Durango, SIRT found no damage on the vehicle.

A WHSV3.com article by Emily Featherstone and Brendan Keefe reports a group of motorcyclists and drivers had been together at a party earlier in the evening prior to the accident. When they were interviewed, they stated Alisa Lee Montalvo, 46, was present at the gathering and was driving a maroon Dodge Durango.

Following the accident, one witness stated he drove past and recognized Montalvo sitting in her badly damaged maroon Durango, with a deployed airbag, parked at the side of the highway. He believed she had stopped due to the accident, so he continued driving.

Montalvo subsequently left the scene of the fatal accident without reporting it.

The license plate on Montalvo’s Durango included the numbers “458.”

Investigators located a man who said Montalvo had paid him to repair her Durango three days after the accident. She told him the damage happened because of hydroplaning. Replacement scrap parts were used that didn’t match the original paint.

On May 12, 2026, a search warrant was issued for the maroon Dodge Durango owned by Alisa Lee Montalvo. Investigators confirmed extensive repairs had recently been made on the vehicle. An airbag had been deployed but not replaced. Montalvo never reported the accident to insurance or law enforcement.

An affidavit for an arrest warrant for Montalvo was filed on May 22, 2026, charging her with three counts of vehicular homicide, leaving the scene of fatalities and serious injuries, and tampering with or fabricating evidence. She was arrested and jailed. On May 29, a judge denied her request for bond.

Lindsey Isaacs has filed suit against two FHP officers as individuals for false arrest, wrongful imprisonment, and malicious prosecution. She is requesting a jury trial.

The corporal responsible for Ms. Isaacs’s arrest has been promoted to sergeant.

Ms. Isaacs’s attorney Patrick J. McGeehan summarized information and photos of her ordeal at this website.

On August 31, 2026, Florida Governor Ron DeSantis ordered Flock cameras and all automated license plate readers (ALPRs) removed from the state highway system.

~~~

TKZers: Who do you think bears responsibility for this miscarriage of justice?

Are there ALPRs (automatic license plate readers) in your area?

Do you believe they are effective in solving crimes?

Are the risks associated with ALPRs worth it?

Can You Automate Grammar?

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Can You Automate Grammar?
Terry Odell

I’ve spent the last several weeks editing Beyond the Frame, first making changes and adjustments based on my editor’s feedback, then printing the manuscript and reading it from start to finish, making more notes, and “finally” (because it’s never really over), letting Word read it to me, which led to finding more glitches.

One of the checks Word offers is its “Editor” function, where it will check for spelling, grammar, inclusiveness—is it so bad to use the term ‘doorman’ when there’s a guy holding the hotel door open for you?—and conciseness.

Let’s talk about grammar today.

I’ve always considered myself pretty good at grammar, but of course, I wanted to see what Word’s Editor function had to say. These are some of the things it flagged across several of my books. What I’ve written first, then the Editor’s suggestion/correction below. Changes in bold.

She put the camera to her eye
She put the camera into her eye

She stared past him
She stared at him

Graham finished filing his reports, surprised to see it was four-thirty.
Graham finished filing his reports, surprised to see they were four-thirty.

He recalled the conversation with his father when Gordon brought up working in the same department.
He recalled the conversation with his father when Gordon was brought up working in the same department.

In return for you doing exactly as he says as soon as he says it, he assures me you will not be the victim of hazing.
In return for you to do exactly as he says as soon as he says it, he assures me you will not be the victim of hazing.

He scooped the dirty clothes into the plastic bag, knotted it,
He scooped the dirty clothes into the plastic bag, knotted them

If Black expected him to wash them, he’d pushed the joke too far.
If Black expected him to wash them, he’d push the joke too far.

Mrs. Vernon saw them to the door,
Mrs. Vernon saw them at the door,

He grabbed the guy by the collar,
He grabbed the guy with the collar

You can’t back out now.
You can’t go back out now.

Three days later, dragging her carry-on through the Denver airport
Three days later, dragging her carry-on through the Denver airport

Her hair, cut in the same short, low maintenance do she’d had since college,
Her hair, cut in the same short, low maintenance do she’d have since college

He called Heather’s company
He is called Heather’s company

He scanned the drivers displaying tablets and spotted a tall brunette woman wearing black slacks, a white shirt, and black blazer, holding one with his name.
He scanned the driver’s (or drivers’) displaying tablets and spotted a tall brunette woman wearing black slacks, a white shirt, and black blazer, holding one with his name.

First, he sent an email to Pam, letting her know he would bcc her on all correspondence
First, he sent an email to Pam, letting her know he would be back her on all correspondence

No matter what lies Gerry spread, he couldn’t destroy Heather’s career.
No matter what lies Gerry spread, he couldn’t destroy Heather’s career.

The bottle Ian opened gave a satisfying pop
The bottle Ian opened gave a satisfying pop

 She surveyed the offerings, willing to try a little of almost everything.
She surveyed the offerings, trying a little of almost everything.

Needless to say, I didn’t approve any of these suggestions—and to be fair, Word said to ‘consider’ its changes. But give me a human who knows how to read in context any day.

My all time favorite. I’d written, “Joe. What the f**k are you doing here at two in the morning?” I think I was using Grammarly at that time (which has been updated and improved), and it told me that since f**k is singular, it should be, “Joe. What the f**k IS you doing here at two in the morning.”

What about you, TKZers? Do you have a grammar checker that is more accurate? Do you trust it, or do you still have to stop and consider each suggested change? Or do you prefer a human?

(Oh, and if you’ll permit a little BSP, Beyond the Frame releases October 1st, but you can preorder it today.)

Beyond the Frame by Terry Odell

 

Find me at Substack with Writings and Wanderings

Beyond the Frame

When deepfake photos threaten their careers, dog-park friends Evvie and Colton become each other’s only allies. Evvie, who vanished behind her camera years ago to escape a painful past, uncovers humiliating fake images of herself. Colton, an insurance adjuster with ranch roots, trusts her eye on a suspicious claim. A family emergency pulls them to Wyoming—where Evvie’s own dangerous secret waits.

Terry Odell is an award-winning author of Mystery and Romantic Suspense, although she prefers to think of them all as “Mysteries with Relationships.”

Wordplay – Fun and Funny Expressions

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by Debbie Burke

As a writer, I like to collect fun words and expressions. How about you?

Here are some that caught my attention:

ADMINISTRIVIA

During our recent interview, author and podcaster Pamela Fagan Hutchins introduced me to this portmanteau. Two words are combined to make a new word that relates to both.

These days, seems like half my time is taken up with administrivia such as filling out unnecessary forms, taking surveys, answering repetitive questions I already answered at least four times. Businesses, governmental entities, medical practitioners, banks, etc. specialize in administrivia with their ongoing demands for personal information because they want to sell us something.

 

PRETZELITIS

Indie film producer Holly Soriano coined this term for an affliction that writers often have. We twist ourselves into all sorts of mental contortions trying to make a character or plot work.

The verb form is pretzelize.

The cure for pretzelitis is often critique from an objective editor or beta reader who recognizes the problem and tells us that we’re overthinking the story.

 

NOT MY FARM, NOT MY PIGS

“Not my circus, not my clowns” has become a cliche. So that’s why I appreciated this fresh twist to convey not my problem. A friend heard it from her country neighbor.

 

Sign at the local laundry and dry cleaners:

WHAT IS IRONY?

THE OPPOSITE OF WRINKLY

 

 

CODE BROWN

At the gym when a little kid has an accident in the pool, they announce “Code Brown” over the PA system to alert employees to clear the pool and call the janitor.

Can’t help but be reminded of the classic scene in Caddyshack.

 

ALGORITHMIC DISAMBIGUATION

This 10-syllable mouthful arrived in an AI scam solicitation email. I can only guess the prompt was: combine two words into a phrase that sounds impressive but means nothing.

Actually, it does mean something: We want your money.

 

YOU CANNOT TEACH A PIG TO SING. IT WASTES YOUR TIME AND JUST ANNOYS THE PIG.

This quote appears on a Murphy’s Law poster (poster copyright 1981) that has hung in our entryway for decades. The saying has been attributed to Mark Twain, Paul Dixon, and other sources. However, according to QuoteInvestigator.com, it came from Robert Heinlein’s 1973 novel Time Enough for Love.

But its roots go even farther back in history.

An ancient Greek proverb has a similar theme:

“He ploughs the air;
He is making clothes for fishes;
He is teaching an old woman to dance;
He is teaching a pig to play on a flute;
He catches the wind with a net;”

Circa 1860s, a variation shows up in a comical Irish ballad:

“You may catch old birds with chaff.
Says the Shan van Vocht,
You may coax a cow to laugh,
Says the Shan van Vocht,
You may teach a pig to sing,
To dance a “Hieland fling.”
Or whistle any thing.
Says the Shan van Vocht.”

All boil down to the same meaning: Don’t waste your time on foolish, pointless, useless endeavors.

Isn’t that what administrivia does???

 

 

THAT DOG WON’T HUNT

An idea or plan that can’t work.

 

 

ALL HAT, NO CATTLE

Lots of hot air and no action to back it up. A close corollary is: ALL MOUTH AND NO TROUSERS

 

THE ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM

A big problem no one wants to face or discuss.

An early use of the phrase occurred in a 1959 NY Times article that stated: “Financing schools has become a problem about equal to having an elephant in the living room. It’s so big you just can’t ignore it.”

However, that doesn’t mean people won’t continue to try.

Photo credit: FilmReference.com

In 1935, the great comedian Jimmy Durante appeared on Broadway in Billy Rose’s stage production of Jumbo. In the show, Jimmy is a down-on-his-luck circus owner trying to escape bad debts by sneaking out of town with his prize attraction, Jumbo the Elephant. As he leads Jumbo across the stage, a police officer stops him and asks: “What are you doing with that elephant?”

Durante tries to hide Jumbo behind him and responds: “What elephant?”

 

And, last but not least, especially for writers:

BIBLIOKLEPT

A person who steals books. From Parade.com

 ~~~

TKZers: Do you have a favorite expression, phrase, or funny word you like? Please share in the comments.

~~~

Merriam-Webster defines DEEPFAKE as: “a digital image, video, voice, etc. that has been convincingly generated or altered to misrepresent someone as doing or saying something that was not actually done or said.”

What if millions of people watched video of you committing a crime? Except you’re innocent. How can you prove it when cops are ready to shoot first and ask questions later?

Deep Fake Double Down was BookLife’s 2023 best mystery/thriller and Silver Falchion finalist. Buy at this link.

Noir Words of Wisdom

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Last Friday evening I hankered for a classic noir movie to watch, and decided on the 1949 film, Side Street, starring Farley Granger, Cathy O’Donnell, James Craig, and Paul Kelly.

A down on his luck army vet, working as a part time postal carrier, discovers the location of two hundred bucks in shady attorney’s office. Desperate to find more money because he and his young wife their first baby on the way, he steals the file the money is squirreled away in, only to discover it’s actually thirty grand, and there’s a murder charge attached.

It’s my personal favorite type of noir, featuring a flawed good guy who gets enmeshed in a web of deceit and crime and struggles to find a way out. The movie was filmed in New York City, which has an almost Gothic look to it, and featuring perhaps the first modern style car chase, Side Street is a fast-paced mystery as our hero tries to find out the secret of the thirty thousand dollars.

There’s much more to noir and today’s Words of Wisdom brings two posts from the TKZ archives to show some of its depth and breadth. First PJ Parrish looks at noir and the style and diction that goes into them. James Scott Bell follows with an examination of film noir and the lessons fiction writers can learn from it.

I am still trying to catch up on my noir reading. (I didn’t get to The Maltese Falcon until about ten years ago, I confess). Digesting noir, with its emphasis on oppressive mood and shadowed morality, with its lean mean style, has helped me find my own voice as a writer. I am not a true neo-noir practitioner, but I feel a deep connection to its dark heart. One of the best compliments I ever got was when Ed Gorman wrote of our book Thicker Than Water: “The quiet sadness that underpins it all really got to me, the way Ross Macdonald always does.”

A couple Christmases ago, my husband gave me The Black Lizard Big Book of Pulps.It’s a compilation of the best crime stories from the “golden age” of pulp crime fiction — the ’20s through the ’40s. It’s about the size of an old Manhattan phone book. And to be really honest, parts of it read about as well.

Many of these guys were dismissed as the hacks of their day, churning out their stories for cheaply printed magazines like “Black Mask” and “Dime Detective.” Yeah, they were lurid, the syntax cringe-worthy, the plots thin or nonsensical. But they tapped into a popular need for a new kind of human hero. The most memorable of the heroes became the prototypes for much of what we are seeing in our crime fiction today — lone wolves fighting for justice against all odds but always on their own different-beat terms. Would we have Harry Bosch without the Continental Op? Jack Reacher without Simon Templar? No way…

And while we’re at it, let’s not get sucked into the notion that noir was only a guy thing. Valerie Taylor had a career churning out books like The Girls In 3B, a classic ’50s pulp tale showcasing predatory beatnik men, drug hallucinations, and secret lesbian trysts. (Her books, among others, have been reissued by Feminist Press.) And would we have Megan Abbott or Sarah Gran without Dorothy B. Hughes, who wrote the twisty indictment of misogyny In A Lonely Place (the source of the Bogart movie)? Doubtful…

To be sure, not all the old stories — like many of the movies — have aged well. The slang sounds vaguely silly now, the sexism and racism we can explain away as anachronistic attitudes. But the armature these writers created is still sturdy.

Especially in pure writing style. I think we can read these stories now mainly to appreciate the streamlined locomotive style that propels these stories along their tracks. When you read them, you can almost hear James M. Cain whispering: “I’m not going to dazzle you with my writing. I’m going to tell you a helluva story.”

These guys sure knew what to leave out. Here’s a passage from Paul Cain’s “One Two Three:”

I said: “Sure — we’ll both go.

Gard didn’t go for that very big, but I told him that my having been such a pal of Healy’s made it all right.

We went.

Not: And then we left the apartment and got in my roadster and set out. We took Mulholland Drive out of the canyon and arrived just before dusk. Just: We went.

How can you read that and not smile? I heartily recommend the Big Book of Pulps.And if you haven’t connected with Eddie on Noir Alley, you’re missing out on some of the best stuff television has to offer.

And now, in honor of our pulp forefathers, I am offering up this little quiz of pulp diction slang for your amusement. Answers at the end. And don’t chance the chisel for a cheap bulge, bo. We Jake?

DEFINITIONS.
1. Ameche
2. Kicking the gong around
3. Wooden kimono
4. cheaters
5. Gasper
6. Hammer and saws
7. Orphan papers
8. Wikiup
9. Bangtails
10. Can-opener

TRANSLATIONS
11. I had been ranking the Loogan for an hour and could see he was a right gee. It was all silk so far.

  1. I stared down at the stiff. The bim hadn’t been chilled off. Definitely a pro skirt who had pulled the Dutch act.
  2. I got a croaker ribbed up to get the wire.
  3. By the time we got to the drum the droppers had lammed off. Another trip for biscuits…

Answers:
1. telephone
2. taking opium
3. coffin
4. sunglasses
5. cigarette
6. Police
7. Bad checks
8. Home
9. Horses
10. Safecracker
11. I had been watching the man with the gun for an hour and could tell he was an okay guy. Everything was cool so far.
12. I stared at the body. The woman hadn’t been murdered. She was definitely a prostitute who had committed suicide.
13. I have arranged for a doctor to get the information.
14. By the time we got to the speakeasy, the hired killers had left. Just another trip for nothing…

PJ Parrish—June 16, 2020

 

Just what is film noir, and why does it have such a loyal following?

As the French name implies, this is “dark film.” It always revolves around crime, and who among us hasn’t had a passing thought of such ilk from time to time? Even if it is just to wonder “Could I get away with it?” Film noir allows us to indulge that fascination without getting too close.

Film noir has a distinctive look—rich black-and-white (as opposed to neo-noir, like Body Heat). Indeed, cinematographers, like the great John Alton, were just as important as the writer and director. (See Alton’s masterpiece He Walked by Nightsometime).

The noir world grinds out rough justice. No bad deed goes unpunished. A guy makes one bad move years ago, and has managed to find a new life…until that past catches up with him to exact retribution (Out of the Past).

Sometimes, the hammer falls on a decent guy who makes one bad choice.

In Side Street, Farley Granger plays Joe Norson, a mailman working like a dog to support himself and his pregnant wife. One day he delivers mail to a lawyer’s office and, alone there, finds $200 in cash. On impulse, he takes it. What he doesn’t know is the dough is part of the lawyer’s extortion racket.

And then there’s a murder.

Soon enough, the bad guy is after Joe, and so is the law, considering Joe a suspect in the murder. Hoo boy. Can he possibly get out of this? We watch to find out, pulling for the guy. Noir justice happens, but exacts a heavy price.

Not all noir leads are good guys who make a bad choice. Sometimes they’re bad guys through and through, and we watch to see if he gets away with it (Touch of Evil). Heist noir (Criss Cross; The Asphalt Jungle) is like that.

Thus, shades of black and white mix, which is just like life.

And makes for compelling fiction, too. The character with a “moral flaw” is more interesting—and more realistic—than a pure, immaculate hero. We relate to characters like that because deep down we know we have flaws, too, and that should our flaws get out of hand, it will lead to disaster.

In a way, noir is like classic Greek tragedy. The purpose of tragedy was to create “catharsis” and warn us of what happens when we follow the dark side.

Thus:

  • Give your Lead a moral flaw, and show it via inner conflict and the “mirror moment.”
  • Indeed, give all your characters, even minor ones, a moral flaw. Even if those are never revealed, it help you come up with more original actions and dialogue.
  • Consider exacting a price the Lead must pay for justice to prevail, a “wound.”

If you want to explore film noir more deeply, I recommend Dark City by Eddie Muller (affiliate link). There are also scores of B-movie noirs available for free on YouTube.

Here are ten of my favorites:

The Maltese Falcon (1941, Dir. John Huston)
Double Indemnity (1944, Dir. Billy Wilder)
Out of the Past (1947, Dir. Jacques Tourneur)
Too Late For Tears (1949, Dir. Byron Haskin)
Act of Violence (1949, Dir. Fred Zinemann)
The Asphalt Jungle (1950, Dir. John Huston)
99 River Street (1953, Dir. Phil Karlson)
The Hitch-Hiker (1953, Dir. Ida Lupino)
Pickup on South Street (1953, Dir. Sam Fuller)
Touch of Evil (1958, Dir. Orson Welles)

***

Do you enjoy noir? Do you have favorite novel or movie? If you write noir, do you have any lessons to share with other writers?

Just Who Are You Calling Old?

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By Elaine Viets
NOTE: This blog is an oldie but goodie.

What’s old?
That’s easy. Anyone ten years older than me.
Yes, that’s an old line, but we writers need to be careful who we call old.
In 2020, calling someone who is 60 “elderly” can anger your core readers.
It can even make readers laugh – at you.

Some readers snicker at Ellery Queen’s description of the “elderly” Inspector Queen who was “not yet 60.” The dynamic mystery writing duo were young whippersnappers of 29 when they created Inspector Queen.
To be fair, I thought 60 was ancient when I was in my 20s. Now, not so much.

Another longtime mystery reader said, “They Found Him Dead” by Georgette Heyer starts with a sixtieth birthday party for Silas Kane who is described as being “very old. As far as I can see, the book was published in 1937.”

How about Edmund Crispin’s “The Moving Toyshop” where the dead victim is described as “an elderly woman in her late 50s”?
What? That’s outrageous!
Except those books were published decades ago, and “old” in 1930 was a lot different than “old” in 1970 – or 2020.

Think back to your grandparents. In 1970, my beloved grandmother was an old woman at age 60. She had a big black purse (stuffed with photos of her grandchildren), sturdy shoes, crispy gray hair and a flour-sack figure. Granted, Grandma had a much harder life than I did, but people used to age faster than they do now.
The government says we’re old at 62. That’s when Americans can start collecting Social Security benefits – and haul them in for a long time. Social Security.gov says, “About one out of every three 65-year-olds today will live until at least age 90, and one out of seven will live until at least age 95.”
Sixty-five is the retirement age in the US, but many people that age still see themselves as young and vigorous.

So if you’re creating an older character for your novel, here are some things to consider:
Older people do not have equal protection under the law. If you have an older person who’s going to be assaulted, many jurisdictions have extra penalties for bashing seniors. In Massachusetts, a man was “arrested and charged with unarmed robbery, assault and battery on a person over the age of 60, assault and battery by means of a dangerous weapon (shod foot – aggravated) and mayhem.” In other words, he kicked an older person with his shoe. That’s something to consider when you have your bad guy attack an older person.
Seniors are often stereotyped as defenseless. But that ain’t necessarily so. An 88-year-old woman was assaulted and carjacked in a Walmat parking lot. She fought back with her cane and survived. “I’m a tough old broad,” she boasted.
And speaking of tough, how about the 82-year-old “award-winning female bodybuilder who turned the tables — literally — on a home intruder and beat him so badly after he broke into her house that he had to be taken to the hospital.” It’s true, and it happened in Rochester, New York. The bodybuilder broke a table over the creep – and she was just getting started.
Statistically, that Rochester Wonder Woman would be considered old, even by today’s new and improved standards.

So just how old do you want to make a senior character in your novel?
A CBS news story says, “Research from John Shoven, a prominent economics professor at Stanford University, suggests that if your chance of dying within the next year is 1 percent or less, you might be considered ‘middle aged.’”
Shoven has a chart that shows “the threshold for men transitioning beyond middle age increased from about age 44 in the 1920s to about 60 today.”

Oddly, 44 would be true “middle age.” Sixty may be the “new” middle age for men, but there are very few 120-year-olds roaming around.
Shoven says, “And finally, if your chance of dying within the next year is 4 percent or higher, you might be considered ‘very old’ or ‘elderly.’ . . . This threshold for men increased from about 65 in the 1920s to 76 today.” So men are “old” at 76.
“Shoven suggests that reduced mortality rates correlate roughly with improved health and vitality at all ages, and can be used as a proxy measure for aging.”
If you’re a woman, you’re even luckier – and younger. Consider this cheery news, ladies, from Shoven.
“By these measures, women today transition out of middle age around 65, a number that has increased from the late 40s in the 1920s. ‘Old’ for women today is about 73, which increased from the late 50s in the 1920s. And ‘very old’ today is about 80, an increase from about 67 in the 1920s.”
People don’t automatically get ‘old’ at 70. Wikipedia sums it up this way:
“Gerontologists have recognized the very different conditions that people experience as they grow older within the years defined as old age. In developed countries, most people in their 60s and early 70s are still fit, active, and able to care for themselves. However, after 75, they will become increasingly frail, a condition marked by serious mental and physical debilitation.”
That’s why my character Margery, in my Dead-End Job series, stays a perpetual 76. I can’t have her aging naturally, or she’ll be too old to go on adventures with Helen Hawthorne.
Personally, I like the question the sage Satchel Paige may or may not have asked:
“How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?”

***************************************************************************

Cozy lovers! Three of my Josie Marcus, mystery shopper mysteries are on sale throughout September. DYING IN STYLE, MURDER IS A PIECE OF CAKE, and AN UPLIFTING MURDER are $1.99 each this month.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What I Learned at Producer and Screenwriting School

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by Debbie Burke

Holly Soriano is an independent film producer in Billings, Montana who’s creating a course about what they don’t teach you at film school but should.

For several weeks, I’ve been a beta tester for her zoom classes in screenwriting and film production.

Holly Soriano

Holly is zany, fanciful, and funny (she does standup as a side gig) with a passionate interest in mental health issues. Her full-length feature comedy My Apocalyptic Thanksgiving stars a hero with special needs. Her upcoming production is about a woman sent to an eastern Montana psych ward where she finds a fairy godmother who will grant her Three Wishes.

Holly has an MFA in screenwriting, studied with screenwriter Corey Mandell, and worked in the film industry in Los Angeles before coming home to Montana.

 

Her teaching style is whimsical. For example, her Power Point slides feature colorful aliens playing the roles of hopeful writers, melodramatic directors, and dream-crushing marketing executives.

Holly is quick to point out that Hollywood is not the center of the universe. The growing indie film industry demonstrates that good movies can be made anywhere and don’t necessarily require monster budgets.

Just as indie publishing democratized books, indie films leveled the playing field for movies. Before then, Holly says there was a class structure where actors and directors were at the top and those behind the scenes doing the actual work were looked down on.

She pokes fun at divas, striking a nose-in-the-air pose, flipping her hair, and proclaiming, “I’m an ar-teest!” 

While writing a book is largely a solo effort, movie making is a collaboration among multiple contributors with different skill sets.

In the 16 shorts Holly has made, she learned how to do every job on the set. She understands where each piece fits into the puzzle and how they all work (or don’t work) together. Her mistakes teach lessons to make the next film better.

Short films (40 minutes or less) are an excellent training ground for filmmakers.  

Thinking like a producer, Holly says, makes a writer realize, “Every line in a screenplay costs money.”

She says, “Films can be made cheap, or fast, or good, but not all three.”

In another example of threes, she explains: “Films are made three times. The writer writes one movie. The director writes another movie. The post-production editor looks at thousands of hours of uncut footage and asks, ‘how can I make this mess into a movie?'”

Raising money is always the big question.

Holly suggests first to put together free resources, like your own working knowledge, no-cost locations, and friends and family willing to help.

You can apply for grants available through state film commissions, charitable foundations, or educational institutions. State film commission offices may support a short that promotes recreational or cultural activities in your area.

Partnering with a nonprofit aligned with the film’s subject is another option. For example, Easterseals runs a Disability Film Festival where four of Holly’s shorts were shown.

An “angel” might be an A-list actor who sponsors the film. That is usually an actor seeking interesting, unique parts to stretch their talents beyond typical roles.

Once you make a movie, what do you do with it?

Theatrical release used to be the main option but no longer. Today films can be distributed through TV streaming services, Spotify, YouTube, libraries, on planes and cruises, etc.

During screenwriting class sessions, Holly emphasized the importance of stakes. Put the hero in a moral dilemma to reveal their character. Force them to make difficult choices. What are the consequences of their actions?

The screenplay for a feature film used to be 120 pages. Now it’s 105 pages or fewer, a reflection of rising costs and shorter attention spans of the audience.

While conflict is important, Holly advises not to have conflict for the sake of conflict. Don’t throw in a random fistfight just because you think it’s time for an action scene. Be sure conflict serves the story.

Interiority is different in films than in books. In books, the author goes inside the character’s head to express their thoughts, feelings, doubts, and fears. Movies are visual. Emotions need to be shown by actions that represent the feelings.

In addition to regular class sessions, Holly also met with each of us individually to discuss our projects. For the others, she reviewed their story outlines or scripts. In my case, she graciously took extra time to read the first book in my thriller series, Instrument of the Devil. She encouraged me to complete Blake Snyder’s Save the Cat beat sheet to help me translate literary to visual.

In the book Instrument of the Devil, the hero Tawny is introduced at home. Holly suggested a film version could instead open with a shot of the massive, imposing Hungry Horse Dam. Tawny’s broke and visits the dam hoping to get her former summer job back. Soon after, she becomes ensnared in a terrorist cyberattack on the electric grid.

Brilliant idea, Holly! That makes a much more visually dramatic first scene and ties in perfectly to the story.

Holly also thinks Nicole Kidman may want to play Tawny, the 50-ish widow, because Nicole believes there should be more stories featuring mature female leads.

Holly, from your lips to Nicole’s ears!

We met one-on-one several more times and Holly converted me from I’m really not interested in making movies to Wow, this is challenging and fun!

She offered various times for each class to accommodate people’s schedules. That added up to a total of 37 sessions that she taught. Thirteen of the 15 beta testers attended multiple sessions in both screenwriting and producer school. 
Being a beta tester for Holly’s upcoming courses opened a window on a creative world I hadn’t experienced before.

Thank you, Holly!

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Learn more about Holly, her projects, and upcoming classes at her website and her production company Darkness and Joy.

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TKZers: Have you written screenplays? Have you considered adapting your story for the movies?

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Please check out Instrument of the Devil and let me know if you think it has movie potential.

Sales link

Revisited: Handwriting Versus Typing

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Since Kay is on hiatus, we’re visiting a previous post by her, from October 2022.

Handwriting Versus Typing

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I was listening to a podcast a few years ago that addressed the benefits of handwriting versus typing. The interviewee (I don’t remember her name) was a graduate student who had forgotten to take her laptop to a class one day and had to resort to taking notes by hand. To her surprise, she discovered she had retained more of the lecture information than she normally did. This led to a research project to compare the benefits of the two methods of taking notes.

The memory of that podcast recently prompted a question in my mind: outside of taking notes in class, does anyone write in long hand anymore? If so, what kind of writing lends itself to longhand vs. typing. I found some interesting information online.

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In a 2021 article on whenyouwrite.com, Jessica Majewski summarized several benefits which I’ve paraphrased here:

Writing by hand is more focused. There are fewer distractions than using a laptop where there are constant temptations to check email or read the latest news story. Also, there are no word processing limitations when writing by hand. The author can draw a mind map, jot side notes, or doodle images without having to open another app.

But typing has its advantages, too. Doing research is a breeze if you’re on your laptop. Just hop over to another app to search out the information you need. Copy and paste articles into your research folder and keep going. But the primary advantage to typing is speed. And sooner or later everything you write is going to have to be typed into a word processor, so unless you’re fortunate enough to have a secretary to do the transition, you’ll have to do the additional work yourself.

But how do the different methods affect creativity? Majewski makes the following case in her article:

“When you are writing by hand, your cognitive processes are more involved than when you type and this can lead to some random springs of ideas. And at the pace of handwriting, you’re not worried about your hands outpacing your brain.”

In a 2017 article on qz.com, Ephrat Livni makes the following statement:

“Brain scans during the two activities also show that forming words by hand as opposed to on a keyboard leads to increased brain activity. Scientific studies of children and adults show that wielding a pen when taking notes, rather than typing, is associated with improved long-term information retention, better thought organization, and increased ability to generate ideas.”

That all sounds good, but does anybody actually write the first draft of a novel by hand? Well, yes. Here are a few authors you may have heard of who have written one or more novels by hand:

  • Joyce Carol Oates
  • Stephen King
  • J. K. Rowling
  • Quentin Tarantino

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As an experiment, I wrote this blog post in long hand. My thoughts flowed as I was writing, and there was a sense of freedom in the process that was different from typing. Fortunately, I was able to read my own handwriting when I finished, and I transferred it to a Word doc.

Well, I’m almost out of paper, so I’ll stop now. We haven’t touched on another creative method: Speech to Text. Maybe we can cover that in a later post.

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So TKZers – Do you ever write in long hand? What advantages or disadvantages have you noticed using handwriting vs. typing? Has this article convinced you to give handwriting another go?

What Should You Write Next?

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by James Scott Bell

Last week we talked about creativity, and getting ideas through the “What if?” game. I’ve always subscribed to the notion that the best way to get a great idea is to come up with lots of ideas, and then toss out the weak ones. That leaves me with several good ideas to choose from. Now the question is which one should I choose to spend the next four or five months writing? (Your mileage may vary.)

When I first got going in this game, I determined to be like a movie studio. I’d have one project that was given the “green light.” That was my work-in-progress. But I would also have a few ideas “in development.” The question then became, which one should get the green light next?

I came up with a three-part test.

Passion

The first, and most important test, is passion. If I don’t feel emotionally connected to an idea or concept, I don’t want to pursue it. Because it is passion and heart that separates our work, not only from other writers, but also the scourge of AI-slop.

I have a list of questions and assign a score, from 1-10, for each.

  1. How excited are you about the concept as it stands now?
  2. How invested are you in the main character?
  3. Is there a meaning involved, something worth saying?
  4. As a prediction, how excited do you think you’ll be about the book two months from now?

Potential

Since I write to put bread on the table, I want to consider the potential for my project in the marketplace. My questions:

  1. Does my plot have high enough “death stakes” (physical, professional, or psychological)?
  2. Is there a fresh setting, or a twist on a familiar one?
  3. Can I envision a knockout ending?
  4. Does my cast of characters turn me on? [Note: Once you start writing the book, there will be moments when the writing bogs down, when you’ll start to question your passion for the project. The fastest way to overcome this is to spend time deepening your characters, via backstory or voice journal. You’ll get excited again, and quickly, too.]

Again, score 1-10 for each.

Precision

Now, I write a logline for each project. A logline is Hollywood-speak for a sentence that captures both the essence and market potential of a project. For example:

A great white shark hunts for food in the waters of a New England town at the height of tourist season.

A teenager takes a time-traveling DeLorean into the past, where his young mother gets the hots for him, and where he must get his father to win her again or he’ll cease to exist.

Detective partners who dislike each other must bond in order to stop a serial killer who chooses victims based on the Seven Deadly Sins.

Score 1-10 for each logline on how well it captures market potential.

I add up the scores for each project, and the “winner” gets the green light.

This method gives me some objectivity, because it’s easy to just grab the next bright idea and start running with it. Again, I’m going to spend months with the project. I owe it to myself to think a little on it before I take the plunge.

One last note on the problem of AI-slop. When it comes to the writing itself, we all know it can be “handed off” to a bot. What that produces, at least as I see it, is heartless, soulless competence. It certainly does not produce the kind of writing that makes readers yearn for more books with your name on them.

Will a bot ever produce writing that does? Perhaps not! One writer puts it this way:

LLM-generated prose is, by virtue of the process that creates it, frozen verbal leftovers. An LLM is perfectly capable of imitating … compound sentences, especially the most basic, unsurprising constructions (“This is not that; it’s actually this.”). And because the vast majority of humans have no desire for anything better, LLMs appear to be good writers. But they’re not….The machines we’ve created can do only the bare minimum passably well because the same is true of us.

I choose to believe that the human element—honed by hard work, experience, honesty, and heart—will always produce a better book than a machine. [Note: Em dashes are mine!]

Now over to you. How do you choose which book to write next? If it’s the next in a series, how do you decide on plot and setting and new characters?

Emotional Words of Wisdom

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Emotion is the key to compelling, engaging, immersive fiction. Show your characters experiencing emotions, and make your readers feel something in response.

Today’s Words of Wisdom pulls excerpts from three previous TKZ posts about putting emotion into your fiction. Joe Moore discusses creating an emotional connection between your characters and your reader. Jordan Dane lays out key ways to infuse emotion in each scene. James Scott Bell looks at putting emotion into the most intense moments of each scene.

As writers, when it comes to our readers, if they have little or no emotional connection with the characters in our books, they won’t care what happens to them. And if they don’t care, we’re in trouble.

An emotional connection is created when a reader formulates conclusions about our characters’ personalities based on what we show the characters doing and saying. It’s not good enough for the narrator to “tell” the reader what a brave and generous guy our protagonist is or that our antagonist is a heinous villain. We have to show the reader through the characters’ actions, dialogue, interior thoughts and reasoning, and the way they treat others and their life choices from one situation to the next. Then a connection can start to form.

A solid approach to establishing each of these is to ask: what would you do? How would you react to a situation that you’ve created in your story? It doesn’t matter whether you’re assuming the persona of the protagonist, antagonist, secondary character or a mere walk-on. You are a human and so are they. They should act and react like humans, think like humans, and reason like humans. Only when they do will the reader form the critical bond or connection. Otherwise, all you have is two-dimensional paper-doll cutouts lacking depth and dimension.

Some helpful techniques include using universal experiences. Who has not told a lie to avoid hurting someone’s feelings? Who hasn’t been faced with deciding between what’s right and what’s easy? Who hasn’t felt animosity or even hate for someone who has wronged you? When your character is in a similar situation, examine how you would react?

If you want your reader to like your character, analyze what it is that makes you like or love someone in real life. Use those emotional traits to build your character. And the opposite is also true. To create a character you want the reader to hate or despise, look for someone you dislike and figure out why. Are they egotistical, self-centered, mettlesome, cold, cruel, or mean? Utilize those universal feelings to build a strong antagonist. But never lose sight of the fact that you’re dealing with humans. Even Hannibal Lecter and Darth Vader had strong human characteristics, good and bad.

One universal element that we all can relate to is pain—both physical and mental. Don’t be afraid to dish out the pain when it comes to developing your characters. It’s okay to put pain in their path because it gives them an opportunity to overcome something and by doing so become stronger or wiser or both. Pain, like any other obstacle, is an opportunity for character growth.

The more human you can make your characters, the better chance you’ll have of your readers forming a connection with them. Always consider how you would react, then have your characters act in a similar, logical manner. And throw in a shot of pain once in a while to keep things interesting.

Joe Moore—October 3, 2012

 

10 Key Ways to Infusing Emotion into Each Scene

1,) Put the reader into the scene using the senses – If you expect your reader to “feel” the world you’ve created, put them into every scene. If your protagonist is walking down a dark alley with gun drawn, you have to be there alongside him, author. What sounds can he hear? What does he smell? What are his physical reactions to his surroundings and how does that play on his fear that’s building? Anticipation is a key element in creating suspense and building on tension. Have patience to let the tension mount.

2.) SHOW don’t TELL – If you truly write the scene as if the reader is looking through the eyes and body of your relatable character, that will put them into the scene. If you only “report” what the character is thinking, it distances the reader from your character. ‘Telling’ takes all the unexpected discoveries from the reading experience and it stifles what the reader can imagine. The reader doesn’t have to think. They’re ‘told’ what to think and imagine. Focus on the action of your character and give them a physical reaction. Rather than ‘telling’ the reader that your character is afraid, show how that fear manifests itself in trembling fingers, trickling sweat, and a punishing heart beat.

“Don’t tell me the moon is shining. Show me the glint of light on broken glass.” Anton Chekhov

“Good writing is supposed to evoke sensation in the reader—not the fact that it is raining, but the feeling of being rained upon.” E. L. Doctorow

3.) Make your characters relatable and sympathetic – Dare to give your villain an odd sense of humor or have her fight for a cause she cares deeply about, so her wicked obsession feels real. Your mercenary could be a loner, but give him a dog to take care of. Load up the emotional baggage in your character’s past and force him or her into a conflict where they have to face their worst fear. Dare to make your perfect hero vulnerable. All these human frailties create relatable and sympathetic characters and will have readers rooting for them.

4.) Reach for the emotion/Make it over the top – Milk the scene for every drop of emotion. It’s not just about choosing the right words. It’s about creating effective imagery triggers that will connect with readers. If you think you’re done with a scene, go back over and layer in MORE of what that scene is about. Ratchet up the emotion beyond where you might normally go. The added touch pays off when you’re using words to put the reader into the scene.

5.) Foreshadow the danger or the obstacles ahead – If anticipation ramps up the suspense, foreshadowing helps the page turning pace of your novel and keeps the reader invested. It creates ‘flow’ between scenes and chapters. Don’t waste a scene ending or a chapter ending. Make it work for you. If a scene or chapter ending fizzles to a close, that gives the reader a chance to put the book down. Tease them with a hint of things to come and they won’t want to let go of the story.

Jordan Dane—May 19, 2016

 

So how do we show when we’re in the intense portion of a scene?

Nancy Kress, my former colleague at Writer’s Digest, had a great article on that in the January, 1993 issue. She gives five ways. Here they are, with my comments.

Physical Reaction

This is the one we usually go to first. Because it’s effective. Rendering how the character feels physically helps the reader vicariously feel it, too.

The trick is to find original ways to do it. Readers are used to sweaty palms, racing hearts, and twisting guts.

Does that mean never using them? Not at all. Just give them a little boost:

Her hands were slick and slippery now.

Her heart thrummed like a souped-up engine. 

His stomach rocked in a greasy hammock. (This is like something I read once in a Stephen King story, but can’t remember which one. Anyway, you get the idea).

So: Don’t just grab the first description that comes to you. Play around a little. Add your touch of originality.

Action

Actions speak louder than words, right? You can always show the character doing something as a result of the emotion.

Again, watch out for the instant answer. An angry boss pounding his fist on the table, for example. That’s expected. Add something to it.

How about pounding a coffee mug down, spilling the brew?

How about yanking out a drawer, scrambling the contents?

A good exercise is to visualize the moment and let your character improvise, try different things. Go a little wild. You’ll hit on something surprising that seems right. When that happens, you know it will surprise the reader, too.

And a surprised reader is a delighted reader.

Dialogue

What a character says in the context of a scene should reveal emotion. And the way you can tell if you’ve succeeded is that you don’t need an adverb to make it clear.

Not:

“Get out of here, John!” Nancy said angrily.

“That’s the last time I pet a lion,” said Tom offhandedly.

No finer example of how it’s done is this clip from Hemingway’s story “Hills Like White Elephants.” A man and woman are sitting at a train station, sipping drinks, as the man jauntily tries to tell the woman that an abortion is no problem. (The mastery of the story is that the word abortion is never used).

“Then what will we do afterward?” [Says the woman]

“We’ll be fine afterward. Just like we were before.”

“What makes you think so?”

“That’s the only thing that bothers us. It’s the only thing that’s made us unhappy.”

The girl looked at the bead curtain, put her hand out and took hold of two of the string of beads.

“And you think then we’ll be all right and be happy.”

“I know we will. You don’t have to be afraid. I’ve known lots of people that have done it.”

“So have I,” said the girl. “And afterward they were all so happy.”

That last line hits hard. We know how she feels from the context and word choice. We don’t need said the girl sarcastically.

James Scott Bell—June 2, 2024

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What are your thoughts on forging an emotional connection with readers, infusing emotion into each scene, and upping the emotional intensity?