Tag Archives: #WritingCommunity

Formula for Happiness

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I heard “formula for happiness” in a movie last week. Speaking as someone who went through an honest life review in my mid-fifties and left a 27-year marriage a year later, a formula for happiness piqued my interest, not because I’m unhappy—quite the opposite; leaving was the best decision I ever made—but because I wondered if a psychologist, scientist, or researcher found evidence to back up their claim of a happiness formula.

Sure enough, I found quite a few studies. Don’t you love it when fiction writers use factual information as a jumping off point?

I decided to write about this subject after a longtime-reader-turned-friend reached out to say my choice to start over gave her the courage to leave her 32-year loveless marriage. Six months later, she’s now content, happy, and loving life again. We had a deep discussion about why too many men and women stay in marriages that don’t work anymore. It’s easy to stay. It takes real courage to leave, especially after decades together.

At the time, I remember my husband said, “Why leave? We don’t even fight.” It’s true, we didn’t. Neither of us cared enough to fight. Rather than hurt him with that fact, I said, “Someday, you’ll thank me for this. I’m setting us both free.” Less than a year later, he did thank me.

That said, along with opening and closing multiple chapters in my life, I feel I have something to contribute to the subject of happiness.

First, let’s look at the studies.

According to long-term findings shared via The Atlantic, Harvard scholar Arthur C. Brooks relies on behavioral shifts rather than accumulating possessions for happiness. He believes we should:

  • Love people instead of using them.
  • Use things instead of loving them.
  • Stay physically and socially engaged to protect our health and manage stress.

I agree with the first two. I also believe staying physically active contributes to happiness. Socially engaging with people every day? No, thank you. Humans wear me out. I’ve always been a happy loner. 😉 I surround myself with animals, nature, and a chosen few close friends/family. But socially engaging every single day? Nope, not for me. I cherish my alone time.

Equations for Happiness

Happiness = Results/Expectations

Meaning, focus on lowering expectations and how you measure outcomes. I’ve said many times writers should celebrate small victories i.e., hitting a word count, completing a chapter, or writing your Nifty Fifty (winking at you, JSB!). Celebrate hitting milestones, rather than stressing about writing the entire book. Also, keep expectations in check. Penning one novel won’t make you an overnight success. Writing is a marathon, not a sprint.

Happiness = Smiles – Frowns

Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak believes we should minimize complaints, arguments, and avoidable stress. I read another study that said smiling, singing, and dancing automatically induces happiness. And it’s true!

Enjoyment + Satisfaction + Meaning = Happiness

Meaning, break down happiness into active joy, accomplished goals, and a deeper sense of purpose. Enjoyment, in this context, is not a synonym for pleasure. Harvard Business School professor, Dr. Arthur Brooks, suggests, “The most miserable people pursue pleasure and stop there.” But pleasure is usually a component of enjoyment, nonetheless.

Enjoyment = Pleasure + Communion + Consciousness

Haven’t you found this to be true? We tend to enjoy pleasurable experiences more when we share them with someone else. Also, faith in a higher power (or whatever you believe in) plays a role in happiness.

Satisfaction = Haves vs. Wants

Brooks recommends a “want less” strategy, rather than “have more.” Serial consumption often has the opposite effect of fueling our wants, thereby shrinking our satisfaction. He also recommends a “reverse bucket list.” Meaning, write down the things we strive for but don’t need to be happy. It’s healthy to have goals, but if you don’t reach them (yet), that’s okay. Accept it and move on. Persevere. We learn more from failure than we do from victory.

Writer Scott H. Young’s Modern Rules for Happiness

(my comments are in magenta)

Embrace Life Seasons.

Accept unchangeable factors while maximizing current opportunities.

Is he talking about aging? If so, aging is part of life, yes. Accept it and move on.

Strive vs. Achieving

View the process of striving as energizing, while recognizing that hitting a fixed goal is often overrated.

Disagree. Hitting a goal should be celebrated. It is not overrated. It feels wonderful. Do we need to hit goals to be happy? No, of course not. Perhaps that’s what he means.

Meet others more than halfway.

Overcome natural human self-obsession through outreach.

I’ve never thought of myself as “self-obsessed,” but I understand the gist of this. It’s better to give than to receive.

Apologize and forgive often.

Use frequent apologies and forgiveness to prevent small conflicts from turning into long feuds.

Disagree. The phrase “I’m sorry” is so overused it’s lost all meaning. How about living without doing things you need to apologize for? If you do hurt someone, show them how awful you feel and try to fix it, rather than tossing out a  meaningless apology.

Also, I don’t believe we should “forgive and forget” just to avoid conflict. If someone harms you, don’t be a doormat. Stand up for yourself. You matter just as much as they do. Afterward, yes, let it go. Life’s too short to hold on to anger and/or resentment.

Stop consuming enraging media.

Cut out toxic media streams driven by engagement algorithms designed to make you angry.

100% Agree.

Look for small novelties.

Actively search for tiny joys and moments of novelty in daily life.

100% Agree.

Exercise a psychological choice.

Remember that how you interpret events is a choice, which helps reduce feelings of helplessness.

100% Agree.

The Happiness Pie Chart

According to psychological research studies, like the “happiness pie chart,” 50% of our happiness comes from our genetics (our baseline “set point”) and 40% comes from our intentional activities, thoughts, and attitudes. Together, these two internal factors account for 90% of our overall happiness.

The Breakdown of the 90%:

  • Genetics (50%): Our biological “set point” inherited from our parents, which dictates how we naturally bounce back from triumphs and setbacks.
  • Intentional Activities & Mindset (40%): Our daily choices, how we process the world, gratitude, and relationships.
  • Life Circumstances (10%): External factors like our income, job, marital status, or where we live account for only a small fraction of our overall well-being.

For me, this breakdown makes perfect sense. My mother wore a constant warm smile, viewed the world through rose-colored glasses (pardon all the cliches in this post!), and never uttered a cross word about anyone. And my brother and I have always been inherently happy people. No matter what life throws at us, we bounce back and rarely, if ever, complain about anything or anyone.

What if you don’t have “happy” genetics?

Don’t worry, you are not doomed. Modern science added a vital caveat to the 50% rule: genes are not a rigid destiny. While you may inherit a specific genetic predisposition, your lifestyle choices and mindset act as environmental switches—a field known as epigenetics. For more on this caveat, visit Neuroscience News.

7 Tips for a Happy Life

  1. Let go of the past. Don’t allow old mistakes to dictate your present or future.
  2. Focus on things within your control. Ignore the rest.
  3. Practice daily gratitude. Appreciate life’s splendor, like sunrises, sunsets, the moon, fall foliage, a warm breeze, snow-kissed trees, birdsong…I could go on and on. In other words, be thankful for another day. None of us know how many we have left.
  4. Prioritize physical and mental health. Maintain proper sleep, nutrition, and exercise.
  5. Surround yourself with positive people. Protect your peace from toxic environments.
  6. Keep learning. Maintain curiosity and personal growth.
  7. Live in the moment. Practice mindfulness instead of dwelling on the past or future.

One last interesting nugget I uncovered…

The U-Shaped Happiness Curve

According to psychological studies across 130+ countries, people typically start adulthood relatively cheerful, hit a significant emotional low point in midlife (between 47 – 50 y.o.), and then experience a major happiness rebound later in life. Globally, life satisfaction climbs at a steady pace after age 50 and peeks at 70.

Over to you, TKZers. Thoughts? Let’s discuss.

Reader Friday-Worst Place Ever

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Have you ever been stuck somewhere? An airport, a hospital, a school, or in that place called The Middle of Nowhere? You couldn’t leave, couldn’t find your way…

 

This poor apple tree, near our home, grows every year in the middle of this ancient concrete slab.

It wants to be out with all of the other trees (I’m sure) producing delicious fruit. But it’s stuck.

 

I’ve been in airports, hospitals, schools, even in The Middle of Nowhere. But the one place I went—voluntarily, I might add—that was my Worst Place Ever was Vietnam, in 2007. I’ve talked about that here in these halls. Yes, it was the Worst Place Ever, but in some ways it was the Best Experience of my life.

I was there for a couple of weeks with a medical team, helping people who had little resources. That part was good—I learned gratitude in a new way.

But the heat, the bugs as big as barns, strange traffic patterns in the more populated areas, and—last but not least—the plates of dog in the open air marketplaces…all of that made me long for home.

But I was stuck there. Couldn’t leave until the job we came to do was done.

So, TKZers, what is Your Worst Place Ever you were stuck in? And what was one thing you learned from being stuck there?

16 Useful Life Hacks

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I love life hacks. TKZ’s own, Joe Hartlaub, used to offer excellent tricks delivered with his classic wit.

In honor of our lost friend, I dug up 16 practical hacks to make your lives a little easier.

Reheat Leftovers Hack: If you reheat leftovers in the microwave, cover the plate with a damp paper towel. It traps steam to keep rice, pasta, and meats from drying out.

Ceiling Fan Hack: Anyone who’s ever cleaned a ceiling fan has gotten a mouthful of thick dust in the face, which makes a tough task (especially for short peeps) even more unpleasant. Instead of the usual method, where dust flies everywhere, slide an old pillowcase over the fan blade, then wipe backward. All the clumps and debris stay trapped inside the pillowcase.

Stubborn Labels Hack: Direct hot air at a price tag or sticker for about 60 seconds. The heat melts the adhesive, letting you peel the label off cleanly without leaving a sticky residue.

De-wrinkle Clothes Hack: Some materials stay wrinkled even if you hang the shirt after drying. Next time you drag a wrinkled shirt from the closet, throw it in the dryer with 2–3 ice cubes and run it on high for 5–10 minutes. The ice melts, creates steam, and de-wrinkles the shirt.

Boiling Pot Hack: If your pot is about to boil over on the stovetop, drop an ice cube into it, which drops the surface temp and stops the foam from rising over the top. Or rest a wooden spoon over the pot.

Stained Tupperware Hack: If you’ve ever stored tomato sauce in Tupperware, you know those stubborn stains are almost impossible to remove, even in a dishwasher. Next time your favorite Tupperware gets stained, fill with warm water, add a few drops of dish soap (preferably Dawn) and a crumpled paper towel. Seal closed. Give it a good shake for 30 seconds. The paper towel absorbs the grease and stain.

Stripped Screw Hack: Place a wide, flat rubber band over the head of a stripped screw. The rubber fills the gaps and allows the screwdriver to grip the stripped screw.

Sheet Set Storage Hack: Fold fitted and flat sheets. For an optimal fold of fitted sheets, tuck the pockets into the opposite pockets. After folding the sheets, slide the entire set into one of the matching pillowcases. Not only will your linen closet look and feel more organized, but the sheet sets are much easier to stack this way.

Keep Lettuce Fresh Hack: Wrap lettuce heads in tinfoil before putting it in the fridge. The tinfoil manages the moisture and keeps lettuce crisp for up to a month.

Knife Substitute Hack: Rather than using a knife, use unflavored dental floss to cut clean slices of cake, goat cheese, or cinnamon rolls without squishing them.

Soften Butter Hack: If a recipe calls for softened butter, pour boiling water into a glass measuring cup. Dump out water and flip the hot cup over the stick of butter. This softens the butter in 90 seconds without melting.

Metal Water Bottle Hack: Drop a generic denture-cleaning tablet into a metal water bottle or narrow flask. Set it aside for a few minutes to dissolve grime without scrubbing.

Glass Shower Doors Hack: Wipe down glass shower doors with water-repellent Rain-X. Water will bead and roll off, preventing hard water stains and soap scum buildup.

Stuck Lid Hack: If a jar lid won’t budge, hold under hot water — heat expands the metal — until the vacuum seal breaks.

Stinky Trash Hack: For outdoor or indoor trash cans, dust the bottom with ground cinnamon to repel flies, ants, and maggots.

Travel Safety Hack: Take a screenshot of your contact info. before leaving the house. When traveling or attending a conference/event, change your phone’s lock screen background to the photo of your contact info. That way, if you lose your phone, a good Samaritan can return it without trying to guess your passcode.

What’s your favorite life hack? Any new tricks to share?

Reader Friday-Let’s Go Adventuring!

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Good Friday morning! Let’s talk adventuring…

Way back in 2007, I took a trip to Vietnam—by the way, never go to Vietnam in July—with a medical mission team comprised of about a hundred people of varying ages.

I’d never been out of the country before except for a quick trip to a small town just south of the border when I was in college in LA.

In Vietnam, my job was working in the medical labs we set up in various places to bring needed care to the locals. Hundreds of people walked to our locations to see a doctor, sometimes carrying their children and their elderly.

 

The trip changed me. Let’s just say I was glad to arrive back home (where there are no spiders as big as my hand), but I’ve never forgotten the sights, sounds, and smells. One thing I particularly remember was the light-up-the-room smiles on faces even in the midst of intense suffering. Amazing!

TKZers—what is the best adventure you’ve ever had? And how did it change you?

 

 

The Science Behind Deep Breathing

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Last night, I was listening to Sleepy Science on YouTube, like I often do. The episode focused on deep breathing and why it works. Because I’m a long-time practitioner of deep breathing and mediation, this subject piqued my interest. We all know deep breathing relaxes us. We’ve discussed the benefits a few times on TKZ.

For example, deep breathing:

  • Reduces stress: Slow breaths trigger the parasympathetic nervous system, lowering stress hormone levels like cortisol.
  • Eases anxiety: Controlled breathing calms panic and depressive symptoms by promoting a sense of safety and calm.
  • Improves focus: Better oxygen flow to the brain clears brain fog and sharpens concentration.
  • Promotes sleep: Deep relaxation before bed helps quiet the mind and supports restorative sleep cycles. This works, by the way. I do it every night before bed.
  • Lowers blood pressure: Deep, rhythmic breathing relaxes blood vessels to ease the heart’s workload.
  • Optimizes oxygen exchange: Belly breathing helps your lungs trade incoming oxygen for outgoing carbon dioxide more efficiently.
  • Relieves pain and tension: Deep breathing releases muscle tension and minimizes pain. Speaking as a chronic pain sufferer, I know this to be true.
  • Strengthens respiratory muscles: Diaphragmatic breathing trains your respiratory system to function with greater endurance and ease.

All those health benefits stem from triggering a single nerve in our body. Seems unfathomable, doesn’t it? But it’s true.

What is this nerve and its function?

The Vagus Nerve

Photo credit: https://www.polyvagalinstitute.org/vagusnerve

The vagus nerve is the body’s main communication cable connecting the brain to major internal organs. It carries signals from your organs back to your brain, and from your brain out to your organs.

Vagus means “wandering” in Latin, and that’s exactly what it does. Actually, we have two, one for the left-side of our body, one for the right.

The vagus nerve starts at the base of the brain in an area called the medulla oblongata, which controls survival instincts, like breathing. The vagus nerve leaves the brain through a tiny hole in the bottom of the skull — called the jugular foramen — and runs down both sides of the neck, tucked inside a protective bundle of tissue beside major blood vessels, like the carotid artery and jugular vein.

On its way, it sends out small branches to the throat, voice box (larynx), and pharynx, helping us to swallow and speak.

From there, the vagus nerve passes behind the collarbone and enters the chest cavity, where it plugs into the heart to act as a natural brake system to slow our heart rate at rest. The vagus nerve then branches out into the lungs to manage breathing and contract airways.

The left and right vagus nerves merge as they pass through the diaphragm, located at the base of the ribcage below the lungs, and enters the abdominal cavity.

This is where the nerve spreads like a massive spider web, connecting to almost every part of the digestive tract, including the stomach, liver, pancreas, gallbladder, small intestine, and most of the large intestine. It tells these organs to release digestive fluids to move food along.

What an incredible journey!

According to the Poly Vagal Institute, that’s not all it does.

  • Through its coordination with facial nerves, the vagus supports expressive communication.
  • As a key component of the parasympathetic nervous system, the vagus modulates the body’s stress response.
  • The vagus nerve contributes to speech by modulating vocal cord function and coordinating with respiratory rhythms, in concert with other cranial and cortical systems.
  • The vagus nerve plays a key role in modulating immune function through what is known as the inflammatory reflex. It inhibits the release of pro-inflammatory cytokines from immune cells.

The science behind deep breathing lies in a biological loop between the heart, the lungs, and the brain.

When we change how we breathe, we manipulate physical pressure inside our chest, which tricks the brain into shifting from “fight-or-flight” to “rest-and-digest” mode. The main action boils down to two main scientific concepts — biomechanical pressure and chemical signals.

In a nutshell, deep breathing causes a chain reaction.

The vagus nerve doesn’t just read thoughts; it responds to physical movement and pressure.

Anyone who practices deep breathing knows the exhale is more beneficial than the inhale.

Do you know why? I thought I did, until I researched the vagus nerve.

When we inhale, our diaphragm moves down to create more space in the chest cavity. This pressure change allows blood to rush into the heart more easily, causing our heart rate to momentarily race.

When we exhale, our diaphragm rises and compresses the chest cavity. This compression shifts blood out of the heart, temporarily raising blood pressure within the local vessels.

Specialized pressure sensors (baroreceptors) on our major arteries detect this sudden pressure shift and send an urgent signal to the brainstem that says, “Blood pressure is too high—slow down!”

In response, the brain fires a signal to the vagus nerve. The vagus releases a neurotransmitter called acetylcholine directly onto the heart. Acetylcholine acts like a physical brake pedal, instantly slowing our heart rate and dropping our blood pressure.

The Secret Sauce

The secret to stimulating the vagus nerve is to prolong the exhale.

Because the vagus nerve is actively applying the “brake” when we exhale, a slower, longer exhale keeps the calming chemical signal flowing.

Ever have a panic attack?

The reason why it feels like you’re dying is because quick, shallow breaths keep your body locked into sympathetic (stress) dominance. The best way out of a panic attack is to inhale deeply, hold for a second or two, then exhale as slow as possible until you’ve completely emptied your lungs. Rinse and repeat.

Other ways to stimulate the vagus nerve:

  • Getting restful sleep (deep breathing helps with this)
  • Sunlight exposure (please use sunblock)
  • Gargling & gag reflex (I’m addicted to mouthwash LOL)
  • Daily movement & exercise (writers, you must get up and move!)
  • Humming, chanting, and singing (during meditation or household chores)
  • Laughter & social connection (as an introvert, I’ll stick to laughter & one close friend)
  • Cold exposure (this also promotes anti-aging)
  • Yoga & meditation (yes, indeed)

Why share this on a writing blog?

Because I adore you and want you to live your best possible life. <3 Deep breathing also promotes focus, concentration, and creativity.

TKZers, how do you stimulate your vagus nerve daily?

Reader Friday-Where Were You 25 Years Ago?

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I’m sure this question has been asked before. (Just like, “Where were you when you heard JFK was assassinated?”)

Where were you and what were you doing on 9/11/2001, when you heard about the attack on America in NYC, Virginia, and Pennsylvania?

I was at work as an orthopedic medical assistant. The entire staff and a few patients were huddled around a TV in one of the offices.

Seeing those images changed us forever.

So, TKZers, your turn. Where were you on 9/11/2001?

 

 

Why Should I Include Trigger Warnings?

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If I listed everything that may or may not upset a reader, it’d ruin the plot of my books. Trigger warnings might be helpful in genres geared toward children, but it’s ludicrous to think all genres should include them. If murder upsets you, good! The psychological thriller did its job. If you only want feel-good stories, maybe you shouldn’t read thrillers, horror, true crime, dark romance, or any other genre that veers into similar territories.

To expect a psychological thriller author to tell you in advance what may or may not cause you—a stranger—emotional distress, is absurd. It’d be a helluva lot easier for authors who write cozy-esque thrillers to say that, rather than force all thriller writers to predict what scenes may or may not upset a reader. Especially nowadays, when everyone seems overly sensitive.

In the real world, life is messy, violent, complicated, and too many nice guys finish last. Did the OBGYN stamp that warning on our wrists at birth? No. Why? Besides the obvious, it’s impossible to tell what a newborn might experience in their life. How, then, are we supposed to predict how a reader may or may not feel?

Also, the faceless, nameless “they” want us to include warnings for mere mentions of a triggering subject, even if it never occurs on the page. What??? Not only do we have to guess which subjects may or may not upset a current or future reader but now, we need to forewarn the mere mention of it, as well?

When do people start taking accountability for themselves?

We didn’t force anyone to buy our books. Thrillers often use an ominous cover and description. Is it our fault the sensitive reader ignored both cues?

I got fired up about this issue after a friend loaned his neighbor a signed copy of Merciless Mayhem. Eighteen months later, she finally returned it, but not before she cursed him out for not warning her of the content. There’s a skull on the cover! The water is blood red! What kind of novel did she think it was? Did she not read the description in eighteen months? Gimme a break. Some people are too quick to place blame anywhere but at themselves.

Another Example:

In my debut novel, MARRED, the protagonist is a rape survivor. I never showed the rape, and the story takes place three years later.

Does that mean a warning of “rape” should be included? Since it’s a series, should that same warning continue for all five books?

Thankfully, TWs weren’t “a thing” when it debuted, but my publisher and I still discussed it. Because I never showed the rape, neither of us considered it a problem, nor did any of my readers, judging by the reviews. I did, however, hear from more than one rape survivor who praised my book for showing what the act of rape does to a person ie., psychological damage and/or residual aftereffects, like obsessively showering or the need for order and/or control in their lives. They all said the book helped them to realize they’re reactions were common in rape survivors.

If MARRED had a TW of “rape” listed, none of those women would’ve read the book that helped them to move forward. Rubs against the argument to include TWs, doesn’t it?

If you still believe trigger warnings in books help trauma survivors, check out this scientific study’s conclusion with even more studies linked to conduct your own research:

Public arguments regarding trigger warnings have been politically charged, complex, and data-poor. Recent research on trigger warnings can importantly inform or perhaps even settle some of these debates. The research suggests that trigger warnings are unhelpful for trauma survivors, college students, trauma-naïve individuals, and mixed groups of participants (Bellet et al., 2018, 2020; Bridgland et al., 2019; Sanson et al., 2019).

The highlights of the 2018 empirical study:

Trigger warnings increase peoples’ perceived emotional vulnerability to trauma.
Trigger warnings increase peoples’ belief that trauma survivors are vulnerable.
Trigger warnings increase anxiety to written material perceived as harmful.

The 2020 Helping or Harming study acknowledges in its conclusions:

Trauma survivors (N = 451) were randomly assigned to either receive or not to receive trigger warnings before reading passages from world literature. We found no evidence that trigger warnings were helpful for trauma survivors, for participants who self-reported a posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) diagnosis, or for participants who qualified for probable PTSD, even when survivors’ trauma matched the passages’ content.

Trigger warnings can get ridiculous. This extensive list includes but is not limited to:

  • alcohol
  • divorce
  • cheating
  • car accident
  • death
  • bones
  • fire
  • gun violence
  • infertility
  • murder
  • attempted murder
  • pregnancy
  • profanity
  • religion
  • miscarriages
  • snakes
  • spiders
  • needles
  • terminal illness
  • anxiety
  • violence
  • hospitalization
  • childbirth
  • Harry Potter references
  • infertility

Keep in mind, we can’t even mention any of these without including a warning in advance.

Are. They. Serious? We’re expected to add a TW if a character drinks alcohol? The author isn’t forcing the reader to drink alcohol against their will.

Similar articles claim all authors have a “moral obligation to warn readers of all possible triggers.” No offense to younger generations, but many are offended by subjects that GenXers or Baby Boomers wouldn’t even recognize as problematic.

One trigger warning listed above is “divorce.” Does that mean if the book contains a divorced character, or the mention of someone divorcing, even in the past, we need to warn readers? What’s upsetting about a divorced character? Sure, divorce sucks to endure in real life, but how much emotional distress does a divorced character cause in readers? If the character never gets remarried—or does, but that still doesn’t erase their prior divorce—are all the books in the series doomed to wear that warning label? According to some readers, they say yes.

What part of fiction don’t they understand?

Why can’t a potential reader gain the same insight from the genre, description, and cover? Why is it our responsibility to guess what may or may not upset some readers?

Or—here’s a thought—maybe sensitive readers should stick with cozy beach reads with cute covers. Why choose a psychological thriller with an ominous cover and description, and then force the author to guess what may or may not “trigger” you?

It’s ridiculous! And so is the overused word “trigger.”

Thriller author Jay Darkmoore explains the difference between being triggered and feeling upset, offended, or sad:

The word triggered comes from psychology. It means to be triggered into a PTSD emotional flashback, to the point where something – an event, like combat and war – happened, and you are transported back to that situation and how you felt at the time. It means that your body reacts and your hormones spike. It means that you begin to shake, to run, to fight. You lose control of yourself because the stimulus has ‘triggered’ significant trauma. It hasn’t just upset or offended you. Being offended is a choice. Remember that. You CHOOSE to be offended and you CHOOSE to be angry.

You do not choose to be triggered. Stop saying being angry is the same as being triggered. They are worlds apart, and it’s very, very disrespectful to actual sufferers of PTSD and trauma to say you got triggered because you read about a bad thing happening that made you feel sad [or upset].  

 

Sensitive readers have no business venturing into the horror or psychological thriller aisles. Psychological thrillers should cause emotional distress. It’s right there in the genre title. And horror, well, it’s horrific.

One author complained about Stephen King causing her emotional distress. Um, yeah, that’s his job.

C’mon, folks. Take some responsibility for yourself.

Real Life does not forewarn us… of anything.

Y’know what I do when I stumble across a subject that isn’t my cup o’ tea? I close the book. Yes, it’s that simple. Close. The. Book. Move on with your life. You’re not its intended audience. And that’s okay. Books are not meant to be one-size-fits-all. Reading tastes are subjective. Isn’t that great? I think so.

I, for one, will never include trigger warnings (unless a publisher demands it). If a reader can’t tell my books may delve into uncomfortable subject matters — a pre-requisite for psychological thrillers, environmental thrillers, and true crime — that’s not my problem. The covers, descriptions, and genre should be enough for readers to make an informed decision.

How do you feel about trigger warnings? Let’s discuss.

Linked to Amazon

<–  This is the cover she thought would be a sweet, feel-good story.

Key “warnings” in the description are in bold:

Shawnee and Mayhem continue to wreak havoc on the Killzme Corporation—the largest animal trafficking ring in the country—by killing one poacher at a time. 

Meanwhile, the traffickers set their sights on capturing Orca for profit and pleasure.

With a ticking clock and no place left to hide, Shawnee and Mayhem alternate between undercover surveillance and clandestine battles to save their loved ones and the Innocent Ones from Killzme’s evil plans.

Skills are tested. Tenuous alliances formed. Not everyone will make it out alive.

Set in a world of cultural wonder, environmental threats, and looming danger, this heart-stopping eco-thriller will have you glued to the page from the first sentence to the last.

Writing a Novel is Like Building a Chicken Coop

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I spent the last nine days on vacation. Well, a “staycation” filled with manual labor in severe heat and humidity. Yes, I’m getting too old for this crap, but there is a silver lining — I never need to build another chicken coop! We built this one to withstand anything New England weather can throw at us.

As I’ve mentioned a time or two, I’m a mother to 17 chickens (among other furred, feathered, or skinned kids). In my last update, I had six adult hens and 11 female chicks, who lived in a temporary nursery coop in my house. When they grew big enough to transition into another temporary coop inside the barn, we knew we only had about three weeks before they needed to be integrated into the adult flock.

As an overprotective mom, it’s nerve-wracking and emotional to release the apron strings (they may have stayed in the house two extra weeks because of this), but the babies needed to learn the ins and outs of chicken society and hierarchy on their own. It’s something their father and I can’t provide. They must learn these life lessons from older and bigger flock members.

Thankfully, the flock leader is Flo, an angelic white brahma with a visible glowing aura.

click to enlarge

Ever seen anything like her? We haven’t, nor do we know why she glows.

Who else would be queen? Flo’s been a born leader since she was two days old. She’s strict — no one messes with Flo — and loving and fair. No unnecessary bullying allowed, but a good, hard peck here and there to keep the younglings in line is part of life. You might remember Biff, her 2nd in command and the muscle for the flock, from this post.

Though the adults have a coop inside the barn, they only had a temporary pen set up in the yard. We did this on purpose until the babies could integrate into the flock, or the adults might’ve gotten overly territorial. This way, everyone could experience their new space together.

The day after the building supplies arrived, we used our vacation to build this monstrous 10’ x 8’ x 8’ coop, with a chicken door that allows them entry into the barn to egg in private. We also keep an extra 5 gallons of water in the barn to keep it cool from the summer heat.

Building a chicken coop and writing a novel both require us to balance high-level creativity with rigid, technical constraints. Both are parallel journeys of messy, structural creation. And I’m not the only one to draw that parallel…

Author William Faulkner famously connected the two:

“Writing a novel is like building a chicken coop in a high wind—you grab any board you find and nail it down fast.”

Before laying out the 4×4 wood foundation, we needed flat, level ground to support the walls and roof.

Some writers create an outline, others might only have a beginning, middle, and an end. Some might not even have that. Your writing process doesn’t matter, if you ensure the story has a solid foundation to support the plot.

We dug trenches and buried wire to protect our flock from predators.

A novel needs tight boundaries to keep out plot-destroying distractions, like irrelevant subplots and tangents that threaten to kill the story’s momentum. 

Posts and beams support the roof and walls of the coop.

Major plot points support the story.

Rather than run posts 16 inches apart like you would for a house, we spaced them out to create an aviary style coop. To achieve this, we needed to run horizontal beams as well.

Rather than characters running straight from the start to the end, writers add setbacks, conflict, tension, character growth, and subplots.

Some coop builders install drop trays or “poop shelves” under roosting bars because chickens create an immense amount of waste. The dirt floor in our coop works the same way.

See the parallel to a “shitty first draft”?

Though I don’t buy into the argument that every first draft sucks, most writers embrace the reality that early drafts can be messy, disorganized, or in need of a rewrite. The editing process is the literary equivalent of raking the coop floor to keep a clean environment.

Once we built the frame and roof, we wrapped the coop with vinyl-coated, metal poultry mesh. Which is so much easier to work with than chicken wire. We still need to paint, tuck the roof under the edges, and add natural branches for extra roosts. They love their new digs!

Writers need to edit, polish the imagery, adjust the cadence, and fix grammatical errors until the prose feels smooth and deliberate.

*Please disregard the mess around the coop. It’s a work in progress.

The one-foot pitch of the roof is intentional for snow to slide off the side, rather than land in the walkway.