A little perspective, like a little humor, goes a long way. —Allen Klein
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My first two novels were written in third person. Each scene had one POV character and the verb tense was consistent throughout the scene.
But when I began my third novel, Time After Tyme, I decided to try something new. I gave one character a first-person POV in her scenes. The rest of the scenes were in third person. I discovered the power of first person in that novel, and I fell in love with it.
“You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view … until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.” –Atticus Finch, To Kill a Mockingbird
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I enjoyed writing first person so much that my fourth novel, Lacey’s Star, and the fifth (a yet-to-be-published middle grade effort), are written in first person from the main character’s POV. To me, first person is especially effective because the narration is a conversation (albeit one-sided) between the narrator and the reader. The narrator relays the story in his/her own words.
But there’s something else that’s special about first person that I think connects the reader to the story in a unique way. It’s a topic that I don’t recall having been discussed here on TKZ, so I’d like to raise it now. It has to do with verb tense.
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Example 1 from the classic by J.D. Salinger.
The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
“They kicked me out. I wasn’t supposed to come back after Christmas vacation, on account of I was flunking four subjects and not applying myself and all. They gave me frequent warning to start applying myself—especially around midterms, when my parents came up for a conference with old Thurmer—but I didn’t do it. So I got the ax. They give guys the ax quite frequently at Pencey. It has a very good academic rating, Pencey. It really does.”
Did you see how the author switched from past tense to present so the character can move from telling the events of the story to offering a personal opinion? It’s as if the character wants to share a little detail with the reader, so he turns directly to the audience and hands out some extra information. This ability to offer side comments in the character’s voice seems to me to be unique in first person, and it shows an aspect of the character that may not work if the author stays with past tense.
When I was working on my first-person novels, I didn’t realize I was using exactly this technique, but someone with editing experience reviewed some of my work and told me the tense had to agree all the way through each scene. I didn’t see it that way, so I went looking for examples that used the first-person past / present approach. In addition to The Catcher in the Rye, I found lots of other examples, and they convinced my friend this was a valid approach.
Example 2 from a highly-regarded Middle Grade novel.
The Remarkable Journey of Coyote Sunrise by Dan Gemeinhart
“Once upon a time, it was hot and I was sweaty. It was about five months before my thirteenth birthday, give or take. We were someplace in Oregon. Honestly, I don’t even remember the name of the town, but I know it was on the dry, hot side of the state, away from the ocean.”
Example 3 where John D. MacDonald gives his main character, Travis McGee, so many opinions to share in present tense that I had a hard time deciding which one to pick.
The Deep Blue Good-By by John D. MacDonald
“The next morning, after making laundry arrangements, I untethered my bike and pedaled to the garage where I keep Miss Agnes sheltered from brine and sun. She needs tender loving care in her declining years. I believe she is the only Rolls Royce in America which has been converted into a pickup truck.”
Example 4 from an American classic.
The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain
“After supper she got out her book and learned me about Moses and the Bulrushers, and I was in a sweat to find out all about him; but by and by she let it out that Moses had been dead a considerable long time; so then I didn’t care no more about him, because I don’t take no stock in dead people.”
And finally, Example 5 from our own JSB.
Romeo’s Justice by James Scott Bell
“Which is why I owed her that blasted thing called honesty. I never want Sophie to have any illusions about this piece of work called Romeo.”
So, there you have it. Examples of past and present tense, each within one paragraph, and all from masters of writing. Novl.org has a nice summation:
“We use tenses every day naturally as part of speech. While consistency is key when maintaining narrative voice, it’s important to remember that you can play around with tense for interesting narrative effect. Whatever you do, just make sure you choose the option that best serves your story.”
“Whatever you do, just make sure you choose the option that best serves your story.” I like that.
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So TKZers: Do you write in first person? Have you noticed the use of both past and present tense in first person narratives? Will the two tenses work in third person? Any reflections on the examples above?
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Private pilot Cassie Deakin offers a first-person opinion right from the get-go in Lacey’s Star:
“I do not like handsome men… Like the one sitting in the passenger seat of my Cessna 172 while I did the run-up prior to takeoff. Frank White.”
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From my first novel:
Everything seemed all right after that. I forgot about the time in the backyard. But I guess now maybe I’d better tell you who I am and that kind of thing.
Chapter 1½
Who Am I?
My name is David Zane Greene, with an e. (When I was four or five, I thought my dad’s name was Don Greene Withany. That’s what I thought I heard him say when he met people. “I’m Don Greene, with-an-e.”) I have a little brother, Jason. He’s okay. He’s just a kid. He was four when all this stuff happened. He’s cute, but he can be a humongous pest at times, you know?
I’m starting 7th grade soon, but the things I’ll tell you about happened when I was in 5th over a year ago. We were living in what I’ll call Rogersville. I won’t tell you its real name, and I won’t tell you where we live now. It’s safer if I don’t . . .
First person is the same as dialogue, in which there are few rules, other than the usual “Don’t be boring.” Characters can say anything they want, especially narrators, who jump around in tense all the time, even in the same sentence: “I sing of arms and the man who of old from the coasts of Troy came…
Good morning, JG.
I like the snippet from your first novel. As you say, “First person is the same as dialogue,” and that’s one of the reasons I like it so much. In just one paragraph, I’m beginning to know David Zane Greene.
Have a good week.
When I was young, we played a game in Sunday school that has stayed with me for decades. We are all given a ten red-tipped matchsticks. Then, we sat across from a partner and had to tell her or him about ourselves. Every time we used “I”, we had to give our partner a matchstick. Once you ran out of matches, you lost. Not won. Lost. That’s the problem with many first person books—I, I, I. I this, I that. Unless your character is a narcissistic villain, it becomes a little tedious with a lot of Tell. The best first person stories don’t overuse I. And that’s hard.
That’s a great game, Carol. And you bring up a good point about the overuse of “I.” Another hurdle in first person narration.
Thanks for your comment.
Thanks, Kay. I’d redone the first 4 chapters of Sail Away on My Silver Dream about 6 times and was stuck. I tried some b.g. material–a teacher’s note, a report card, and a therapy session transcript. The latter, in first person, really got into David’s voice, so I redid the early chapters that way. I finished the book easily, up to 10K words on a weekend.
Very nice. David’s voice draws the reader in.
10K words on a weekend! I’m going to have to hunker down to keep up.
You’re writing a MG story? How fun!
I have noticed tense variations when I write personal essays. It sounds more conversational. We speak to one another at the dinner table in past/present. But it IS more difficult when editing.
My MG novel is being published by Elk Lake Publishing. Release date will be early 2025. And yes, it was great fun to write. Honestly, Reen and Joanie practically wrote the book themselves. (When I told them the story was about a treasure hunt in their town, they were unstoppable. All I had to do was come up with the clues. 🙂 )
You’re right — conversation includes both past and present, and it all makes sense. But I can see it’s more challenging for an editor.
Have a great week. (Future tense) 🙂
Maybe it’s early but I’m seeing these examples as more of present tense with references to things that have already happened that appear to be past, but they’re also all first person, so you’re in the head of the character.
What I really don’t like is a book written in first person present tense. I can count on the fingers of one hand authors who do it well enough to keep me in the story. Otherwise, it seems distancing rather than a closer connection.
YMMV.
I’ve only read a few books that were written in present tense, but, like you, I don’t care for it.
In 5th grade, one boy, Bob, invariably did his book reports in present tense, (“An’ then he goes and loses the key an’ they can’t get in, an’…”) When I read a novel in present tense, I associate the MC with Bob, an’ I toss it an’ turn on the TV.
Excellent, Kay. I have also switched from 3rd POV to 1st. And I enjoy reading a story when the retelling of events is past tense, and the conversation with the reader or the character’s conversation with himself/herself (internal monologue) is present tense.
Great topic!
Good morning, Steve. I just glanced back at my copy of Bolt’s Story, and I see it is a very conversational look at your character’s history from his first person POV. And the reader is immediately drawn in because the emotion is so real. Great job.
Have a good writing week. (Or chopping or sawing or whatever. 🙂 )
Just had a quick look at all my novels. First person, every one, and not a present tense to be seen. I think I missed a trick there. I’ll have to keep this in mind when I start the next one. Thanks for the tip.
Good morning, Michael.
When I was scanning first person novels to get information to support my argument, I came across a couple that didn’t have any present tense. (Granted, I was skimming through things and may have missed it.) I think that may be the case where the first-person narrator is not the main character.
Hope you find it useful for your work!
Thanks for tackling a complicated subject, Kay! I too love first person and was influenced by Raymond Chandler and John D.
As an editor, I often run across tense changes but they are usually unintentional, unlike your good examples, where tense changes are for a specific purpose.
As J says, the author/narrator can address the reader directly, engaging them in conversation. That always reminds me of George Burns’s TV show. After Gracie’s antics on stage, he would turn to the audience and make comments. In theatre, that was called “breaking the fourth wall.”
My current series is third person, past tense. Occasionally I run into a quandary that requires some thought when describing an ongoing happening. E.g. “Montana is overrun with tourists every summer.” It’s more accurate to say that in present tense yet it can be a bit jarring when the story events are told in past tense. I have to figure out case by case what sounds most natural.
Morning Debbie!
I can see that changes in tense can be made in third person, but it would be harder to make it work.
Love your example of George Burns. I can remember his turning to the audience to make his observation. Very similar to a first-person narrator sharing his opinion.
Thanks for the shout out, Kay.
Going into present tense seems especially suited to a series, where the narrator can describe various recurring characters. Janet Evanovich does this in every Stephanie Plum book.
Good morning, Jim.
Good point about the series. It does give more opportunity for the narrator to give his/her opinions.
And thanks for mentioning the Stephanie Plum books. Stephanie has plenty of attitude to share!
My current WIP will eventually be in third person since I have multiple POV characters, but in my first draft, I’m writing in first person so I can go deeper into their POV. I keep track of who is talking by labeling my scenes. It’s going to be a pain to switch everyone back to third person, but I enjoy writing that way.
That’s a very interesting approach, Michelle. I can imagine that’s a lot of work to switch back to third, but whatever works for you is good.
I’ve read books where each chapter was titled with the POV character’s name and written in first person. That can be an effective mechanism.
Good luck with your book!
Except as soon as you turn the page, you’ve lost the chapter title and everything is “I” so you (if you’re like me and have to put the book down at times) soon have no clue who’s talking.
Good point, but that’s why I love short chapters. 🙂
Good morning, Kay! Fascinating post, and one near and dear to my heart. All six of my urban fantasy novels and three novellas are written in first-person. I opened up Empowered: Agent, the first book, and discovered one moment where Mathilda is thinking in present tense;
“Okay, so Alex is Support, but I had to talk to someone. Right now, a sympathetic, concerned and incidentally handsome guy was the only one I could talk to. My other friends were plants, and that was a pretty one-sided relationship.”
I think subconsciously I choose to switch to first because Mat is speaking directly to her listener, but I didn’t repeat it. Today’s post illuminates the power of switching tense in first person. I would use that power sparingly, at crucial moments. It highlights a consideration of first person: who is the narrator telling their story to, and at what remove in time from that story?
Have a wonderful week!
Good morning, Dale, and thank you for pointing out the power in switching tense.
When I was researching this topic, I was struck by how different authors used vastly different approaches. For example, John D. MacDonald had Travis McGee sharing present tense information frequently, but other authors used the technique sparingly. It seems to depend on the particular effect the author is going for.
Such a lot to think about when penning that first person novel!
Have a great week.
Excellent blog, Kay. I was a newspaper columnist for more than 20 years, so it’s natural for me to write in first person. My Angela Richman novels started in third person, at my editor’s suggestion, but as the series went on, I switched to first person. One drawback to first person: Everything has to be related through your character, so they have to find out about the murder and clues on their own.
Good morning, Elaine!
As you point out, there are hurdles to overcome in first person. Although Lacey’s Star was written in first person, I did include two flashback chapters in third because I thought the reader needed to see those scenes even though my main character wasn’t present.
Have a great week.
Gret post! I write in 3rd past tense…but sometimes I write out a scene in 1st person, to make sure I get the emotion right. The only book I’ve read in 1st person present tense is the Hunger Games, and the writing there was so good, I didn’t even notice. 🙂
I like your idea of writing a scene in first person to get the emotion right, then convert it to third. Very interesting. That’s the same process Michelle mentioned.
Fascinating post & comments, Kay!
I’ve never written in 1st person, but this post got some gears grinding for me. Oh wait! That sentence was 1st person, right?
Something to play around with in the sandbox in my office…
Good week to ya!
Enjoy the sandbox, Deb. First person is a good playmate.
Good week back at ya!