To Write Better Fiction, Try Writing Something Else

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by James Scott Bell
@jamesscottbell

We all know that various tasks, assessments, creations, observations, and reactions trigger different parts of the brain. For example, the other day I was driving along on a busy, two-lane street near my home, enjoying the nice day and the classical music station on the radio, when a loud VROOM blasted next to me and instantly put me into “fight or flight” mode, as some idiot in a Mustang shot past all the cars by racing on the median strip, then darting back into traffic like he was playing a video game, then went out again to pull the same stunt. A bad accident waiting to happen, which is old news here in L.A.

Anyway, when it comes to creation, we have a “team” consisting of the imagination group, the analytical staff, and the Boys in the Basement. They band together on our projects, and as we work in tandem with our good ol’ noodle (for you youngsters, noodle is old-school slang for head, which is derived from the 1500s word noddle—which in Old English meant head resting on a neck—and some smart aleck in the 1700s who added the “oo” sound from fool. I also could have chosen nut, noggin, or dome. Take note, as there will be a quiz on this later) we exercise our brains, which is essential for our overall health.

Which is why handing off all creative effort to AI is like preparing for a long distance race by eating Twinkies. The long term effect is horrible, especially in young brains that are still developing. Yes, AI can be an aid in some situations, but there should be a flashing Approach With Caution sign at every turn.

Now, there are different kinds of writing that work out the various parts of the gray matter— fiction, essays, poetry, jingles, marketing copy, letters (remember letters? That you write in your own hand and put in an envelope? That took some care, unlike the emails we send every day and the texts we fire off like so much digital buckshot) and anything else that requires a modicum of thought.

I consider myself a writer. I write. That’s all I ever wanted to do. I specialize in that form of fiction called the thriller. It’s my bread and butter—in fact, it butters my bread—and it is my primary focus. But when I engage in another type of writing I find that my overall creative muscle is improved, and I feel that when I go back to fiction.

That’s why I started a Substack. It’s my foray into a type of nonfiction I call “Whimsical Wanderings.” These are free-range essays without fences. I spend part of my early mornings playing in this part of my brain, and bring order to it later. Ray Bradbury once said of his own writing, “Every morning I jump out of bed and step on a landmine. The landmine is me. After the explosion, I spend the rest of the day putting the pieces together.” I can relate.

And now, gentle reader, I am happy to solve a problem for you. With the holiday season upon us, some of you may be scratching your head about what to get for that certain someone you find it so hard to get things for. What gift is suitable, surprising, fun, and relatively cheap? Now you have it. The best of Whimsical Wanderings is contained in the collection Cinnamon Buns and Milk Bone Underwear, the print version of which is available for purchase at the special intro price of $9.99 (that’s the lowest price Amazon will allow for this book. In a week it’ll go to $15.99, at which time I’ll start announcing it to the world at large, including Albania). You may get it here. There’s also the ebook version at the low end of $2.99, here. If I may offer a blurb:

Every time one of James Scott Bell’s Whimsical Wanderings arrives in my email box, I smile, even before I open it. Each post takes me down a path I am not expecting but am so glad for the journey by the time I reach the end. If you want to lift your spirits while being surprised by how one thought can lead to another, treat yourself to this book! — Robin Lee Hatcher, Christy Award winning author of The British Are Coming series

End of commercial. I’ll leave you with this from Malcolm Bradbury, in Unseen Letters: Irreverent Notes From a Literary Life:

I write everything. I write novels and short stories and plays and playlets, interspersed with novellas and two-hander sketches. I write histories and biographies and introductions to the difficulties of modern science and cook books and books about the Loch Ness monster and travel books, mostly about East Grinstead….I write children’s books and school textbooks and works of abstruse philosophy…and scholarly articles on the Etruscans and works of sociology and anthropology. I write articles for the women’s page and send in stories about the most unforgettable characters I have ever met to Reader’s Digest….I write romantic novels under a female pseudonym and detective stories…I write traffic signs and “this side up” instructions for cardboard boxes. I believe I am really a writer.

Do you do any writing other than fiction? Have you tried morning pages? How do you exercise your cranial creative capacity?

And Now, A Word From One of Our Judges

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Over the years, I’ve judged several writing contests, local and nationwide. It’s an enjoyable way to give back to those organizations and the reading community, exposes me to new writers, and is an eye-opening experience. Today I’d like to briefly discuss what makes an award-winning novel.

It has to be outstanding, towering over the other submissions.

It should be simple, but barely five pages into any book, I can tell if it’s a quality publication, or one that falls short. You’re on your way if I’m engaged after the first five pages, but grab me on page one. Think Stephen King, the man who can catch me within the first paragraph, or James Lee Burke, whose writing voice is as smooth as a glass of good whiskey.

To help you along, here are a few suggestions.

  • First, find your writing Voice, and try to make it unique. This has been discussed ad nauseum here on the Killzone Blog, so do a search and read what the Masters have offered.
  • Please, please, I beg you, please avoid as many adverbs as possible. Yep, we’ve plowed that ground before, but really, “He peered around the bush sneakily.”

Good Lord. Just read that again. Her peered around the bush sneakily. Makes me want to throw up in my mouth a little. Or this one, “he crossed the tarmac staggeringly,” is going to charge up my Crap Meter and if there are many more of these stinking piles, it goes into the “Nope” box after it bounces off the wall.

  • Let’s get this out of the way, too. At this stage in the evolution of AI, I can almost always (99%) of the time tell if it was written by a program and not a real person. For understanding, refer to those horrible emails you likely get each week that tries to extract money from your bank account by offering to promote your novel for mere pennies on the dollar.

“Dear Reavis, your book, The Texas Job is an excellent example of western noir, but it’s languishing in an unread desert like a tumbleweed in a western ghost town, but we can help with that. Let’s get this tumbleweed rolling toward potential readers….”

Or “I hope you’re doing well. I’m Natashia Smith and represent  Hagia, organiser at The Best Writers Life, a vibrant community of 1,500+ passionate readers, writers, and creators who love immersive historical fiction, powerful characters, and richly detailed frontier stories….”

I’m afraid AI will someday learn to cloak itself, but right now this style is as obvious as a Texas twister on the windswept plains…sorry about that.

But back to contest entries.

  • Find the proper starting point of your novel.

Many authors (and I was guilty of this as well way back when) begin with a Prologue, a device which used to work back in the days of John Saul, but hasn’t aged well. Though it’s possible to weave it properly, it can, and does work sometimes, but not often. Prologues are usually designed to bring tension and/or excitement at the outset, likely knowing in the back of the authors mind that the true beginning is slow.

Dig back into you manuscript and find where a scene truly grabs your readers attention without resorting to devices. Start there at the moment where action or tension arises.

And to build on that theme, your first sentence or paragraph should grab the reader by the throat!

Charlaine Harris opened Dead Until Dark like this. “I’d been waiting for the vampire for years when he walked into the bar.”

“The morning burned so August-hot, the marsh’s moist breath hung the oaks and pines with fog.” Delia Owens, Where the Crawdads Sing.

“All this happened, more or less.” Kurt Vonnegut, Slaughterhouse-Five

Yep, that’ll get my attention. Why do I bring that up? Because as contest entries trickle in at the beginning, I’ll have time to sit back and hope the author will develop the plot and characters without wasting any more time, even though the beginning is rough. By the time the deadline rolls around, entries arrive at my doorstep in droves, and with the judges’ deadline looming, the book has to capture my attention, and that of the other judges, as soon as we open it up.

  • Give me something I haven’t seen a hundred times.
  • I need strong pacing and clean prose. For a Masters Course in both categories, read Texas author James Wade. He’s pushing Cormac McCarthy and Larry McMurtry out the back door.

  • Dialogue should be crisp, and mean something. I don’t need pages of two characters chatting each other up over tea and cookies about last night’s dinner party, unless it is the jumping off point of the novel. Save that for real life. Let’s get to the meat of the plot to keep me engaged.
  • No three-page info dumps or looooong descriptions of characters features and clothes. Scatter that necessary information throughout the novel so that it blends in and doesn’t stand out.
  • Less is more, when it comes to those same descriptions. John GIlstrap is the man to copy when it comes to his protagonist Jonathan Graves. He doesn’t give us details, but I know what the guy looks. like and would recognize him at an airport…along with Boxers. (Read his books to meet those guys.)
  • How about a fresh angle on a familiar genre. Tooting my own horn here, but I hope when Comancheria is in the hands of judges next year, they’ll see a different kind of western.

  • Judges will remember how a book makes them feel.

That last bullet point brings us to the aforementioned Cormac McCarthy who wrote Blood Meridian. I had to take a shower after the last page.

Florida Roadkill by Tim Dorsey left me reeling because of the plot, twists, and pure fun. It is one of the few books I immediately dove back into after The End. The second was Jeffery Deaver’s The October List. They both made me feel like I’d experienced something special and because they were so good, I almost raced through them too fast. I had to go back to truly absorb the brilliance of those two novels.

  • Lift your vocabulary. I don’t mean keep a thesaurus open on your computer or desk, but avoid common words. See above for the word “read.” Yep, I read those books, but found a different way to say it. I “experienced” them, “absorbed them,” and “raced through the stories because the action and pacing were perfect.
  • If sentences sound awkward, re-structure them.
  • Go line by line and delete or re-write every passive sentence you can find. “The tiles are delivered and the backsplash will be finished by this evening.” Or, “Safety glasses are worn by the entire crew to minimize the risk of injury.”

How about: The tiles arrived just in time to finish the backsplash by sundown.

Or: The crew wears safety glasses at all times while on the job.

Where did those two examples come from? Most HGTV programs. Listening to the narrator on many of these series is a crash course in passive sentences.

And finally, highlight the following.

  • The entry should be polished to excess, with no typos or layout problems.

That sounds simple, and typos get through in even the most carefully edited novels, but you’d be surprised how many times published works contain “their” or “there” for “they are.” Some say typos have no bearing on the quality of the story, but it’s the entire package an author should be concerned with, and run-on or misspelled words shriek a message of laziness and disrespect for the reader and their hard-earned cash.

Pure typos or misplaced apostrophes leap out at the reader. Sometimes I feel as if the author finished his or her manuscript without doing much more than a quick read then sent it on to be self-published. No fault if you want to go that route, many successful authors are self published, but find and pay an experience d editor to clean up your work.

These are just a few of the problems I’ve seen.

  • One additional note (and it has nothing to do with the quality of the novel itself), but the cover is my first introduction to your submission. If it looks like a second grader used clip art to wrap your novel, it won’t make a good impression. I know, that sounds bad, but it’s true. I speak from experience. Just look at this one of my own, which I’m afraid still hasn’t overcome that first impression. I argued with my publishers until I turned blue. They finally gave me an ultimatum, and I caved, but I wouldn’t do it again. When that publishing company was absorbed by another, the CEO, in a huge staff meeting, pointed at his cover on the screen and asked, “What the fudge were you thinking?”

Only she didn’t say fudge.

Would you pick up these familiar titles if this cover was the first time you saw them?

Probably not, and with that, good luck and may the best book win.

 

 

 

 

 

Reader Friday-When Did The Music Stop?

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This post is taken from one I wrote a couple of years ago on my own website. Thought it fit nicely in today’s world. You can read the original here.

When Did The Music Stop?

I get up every morning at about the same time, drink water and coffee, talk to my husband, pet my dog. Then drink more coffee.

Then what do I do? Usually the biggest mistake of the day.

Open the news media sites.

Then say to myself, “When did the music stop?”

Yeah, you too?

 

 

Those media sites are cluttered with other kinds of people. The ones who yell at each other, redefine life on planet earth in their own image, put God on a paper airplane and throw him to the wind, then sit in his chair.

The planet they live on is not the one I want to live on.

Where have all the real people gone? You know, the ones who go to work, take care of themselves and their families, mow their lawns, fill up their tanks, and shop for groceries? And, dare I say, go to church on Saturdays or Sundays?

Kids on tricycles and bicycles and skates—the kind with keys—zooming up and down the sidewalks, playing kick the can and hide-and-go-seek, with parents and grandparents and neighbors cheer-leading from their front porches is the planet I’m from and want to get back to. Back to where some things were just not confusing . . . ya know what I mean?

Back to when homework was the first thing you did after school . . . after the peanut butter, mayo, and bologna sandwich, of course.

When talking to someone happened without a screen between you.

And people cared. About each other, about animals, and a smile didn’t hide an agenda and didn’t need a mask. A smile was just a smile, the way God intended it to be. A handshake meant something and we weren’t afraid to touch someone else’s fingers.

Back to when we watched the TV–not the other way around.

Where did that world go? It slid away from us a long time ago and maybe hit a few snags along the way, like when Woodward and Bernstein were on it BlueBonnet . . . but now here we are. And we don’t even know where here is.

 Again, when did the music stop? Okay, take a breath, Deb.

I think it’s still there. We just have to listen with better ears.

 

 

After I get some more coffee, I’m going outside to see if I can hear it.

See ya out there!

 

 

 

 

 

Almost Full Circle?

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Almost Full Circle?
Terry Odell

Lately, I’ve seen a growing number of authors choosing to take selling books into their own hands. I get it. Selling through the “usual channels” means sacrificing a chunk of the profits. Plus, people are stopping making purchases from certain outlets for personal reasons. With sales from the Big Store dropping, or a desire to stop sharing revenue, I can understand indie authors wanting to find other ways to make up for lost sales.

My thoughts? Note: This post is focused on e-books.

This takes me back to the pre-Kindle days, when ebooks were starting out, and e-publishers were popping up like mushrooms after a rain. These were actual “publishers.” You had to submit your book, it had to be accepted, and most likely went through an editorial process. How rigorous that process was varied.

They had an art department that designed a cover. How much input an author had varied there, too. Some accepted suggestions. Other said if your name and the title were spelled correctly, that was it.

For these publishers, your book lived on their site, and people had to go there to buy it. If you published different books with several of these, then a fan might have to go to each site separately to buy the books.

Here are some of the early ebook pioneers.

Ellora’s Cave, and its offshoot, Cerridwen Press
Loose ID
Samhain Publishing
Fictionwise
eHarlequin/Harlequin Digital
The Wild Rose Press, which is still around.  (I was their first outside contracted author back in the day, when their main offering was short romances.)
Liquid Silver Books

There were no e-readers then, either. You read on your computer, a PDA, Palm Pilot, or printed the book. PDF was a common format. Anyone remember Rocketbook/.rb?

A while later, other sites (still pre-Kindle) would let you put your books up for sale in their “stores.” This meant you didn’t have to get approval, and you could put your book on more than one site. A step toward one-stop-shopping, although most had a specific genre focus.

Some examples:

Fictionwise
eReader.com
All Romance eBooks
Diesel eBook Store

Most met their demise once Amazon and the Kindle joined the party.

At the time, my genre was romantic suspense, so I was publishing at venues that targeted romance readers. If someone bought their books from All Romance ebooks, then by golly, I was going to make sure mine were there, even if it was a single reader who requested it.

Now, with authors creating their own storefronts, it’s come almost full circle. I’m not a big fan. If I want to shop, I want to look at books from lots of authors. I don’t want to have to bounce from one site to another, buying from author A here, author B there, and author C somewhere else.

Does this mean I might miss books by excellent authors? Probably. Heck, I already deal with that because I buy my books from Barnes & Noble.

There are plenty of excellent authors who prefer to go wide and make their books available to as many outlets as possible. If I really want a book by an author who’s not at B&N, I go to my library. I’m not going to get into a “which is better, wide or exclusive”? argument here. Those are personal decisions.

I also have no plans to open my own storefront. Too much bookkeeping, more hoops to jump through, and there are still costs of doing business. I’m lazy.

Your thoughts? Shopping from multiple author storefronts or the one-stop-shopping at the major ebook stores, such as Kobo, Barnes & Noble, Apple, or Amazon?

Authors, do you have a storefront? How’s it working for you?

New! Find me at Substack with Writings and Wanderings

Deadly Ambitions
Peace in Mapleton doesn’t last. Police Chief Gordon Hepler is already juggling a bitter ex-mayoral candidate who refuses to accept election results and a new council member determined to cut police department’s funding.
Meanwhile, Angie’s long-delayed diner remodel uncovers an old journal, sparking her curiosity about the girl who wrote it. But as she digs for answers, is she uncovering more than she bargained for?
Now, Gordon must untangle political maneuvering, personal grudges, and hidden agendas before danger closes in on the people he loves most.
Deadly Ambitions delivers small-town intrigue, political tension, and page-turning suspense rooted in both history and today’s ambitions.

Preorder now

Terry Odell is an award-winning author of Mystery and Romantic Suspense, although she prefers to think of them all as “Mysteries with Relationships.”

Weird Words

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Merriam-Webster 1847-1947 dictionary now on my iPad | Flickr

Photo credit: https://www.flickr.com/photos/spelio/8246404410, CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

 

by Debbie Burke

Writers love words, the weirder the better. Here’s a selection of unusual words and phrases that were unfamiliar to me until recently.

JUST DESERTS – This isn’t a new phrase but for many years, I spelled it wrong. I always assumed it was “desserts” (like cake and ice cream) because that’s how it’s pronounced. Turns out the correct spelling is “deserts.” A savvy TKZ follower (sorry, I can’t remember who) provided the correction. Thanks!

The original phrase came from 16th century Latin. “Just deserte“ meant “what is deserved.” Back then, it could refer to either reward or punishment. Over time, it took on a negative connotation. When someone did something bad, they had a comeuppance and got what they deserved. In crime fiction, when a villain is caught, they get their just deserts.

Why doesn’t someone start a business that’s a combination mystery bookstore and bakery? Call it “Just Desserts.”

A big thank you to a knowledgeable reader of British military history who introduced me to the following three examples:

INFRA DIG – This is a British slang term meaning “beneath one’s dignity” or “lower than one’s status.” The Oxford English Dictionary defines it as an adjective. Borrowed from the Latin phrase infra dignitatem, its earliest known use was traced to Sir Walter Scott in 1824.

Example: A snobbish author may feel it’s infra dig to have to do their own marketing. They’re in for a comeuppance.

OLQ – More British slang that’s an acronym for “officer-like qualities.” It’s used to describe enlisted personnel who have the potential to be promoted to officer ranks. Traditionally, social class was important in English military hierarchy. Due to family status, someone could automatically become an officer, whereas a person without social standing had to work extremely hard to be promoted.

COR BLIMEY or GOR BLIMEY – A British exclamation of surprise, shock, or anger. Cor or Gor are substitutions for the word “God” and are used to avoid the blasphemy of taking the Lord’s name in vain. Blimey is an abbreviated Cockney pronunciation for “blind me.” Therefore, cor blimey means “God blind me.” The term is firmly established in British slang and is the title of a 2000 TV movie.

 

SYNECDOCHE and METONYMY – These are literary terms that refer to using part of a phrase as an abbreviated substitute for the entire phrase. Oregon State University offers a helpful video to explain these related but slightly different definitions.

 

Dr. Virginia Apgar examines a newborn. Photo credit: Wikimedia

APGAR test or score – This is a quick assessment of a newborn’s condition administered by medical providers at timed intervals, the first within one minute following birth, then followed at five minutes following birth. It’s the acronym of:

A – appearance

P – pulse rate

G – grimace (indicates responsiveness)

A – activity

R – respiration

Little-known fact: the APGAR test or score is named for Dr. Virginia Apgar, an obstetric anesthesiologist and university professor who devised the test in 1952. Her mission was to reduce infant mortality by quickly recognizing problematic symptoms so they could be treated promptly.

 

This last phrase is from a crusty, cranky guy who’s done contracting work at my house. Mark  brags he’s never read a book in his life, but he comes up with colorful expressions like this one:

“The sun sometimes hits a dog’s ass.”

~~~

TKZers: Do you recognize any of these examples? Do you have your own favorite weird word or phrase to share?

~~~

 

 

Is your writing group looking for a speaker? I’m scheduling zoom classes based on The Villain’s Journey-How to Create Villains Readers Love to Hate and would love to talk with your group. Please check out the book and email me at debbie@debbieburkewriter.com

From Cockpit to Keyboard: What ‘Aviate, Navigate, Communicate’ Teaches Novelists

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Never wait for trouble. —Chuck Yeager

* * *

 “Aviate. Navigate. Communicate.”

When I was taking private pilot lessons, my instructor drilled this three-word phrase into me in every lesson as essential to successful flying. Although you need to keep all three of these skills in mind and not fixate on any one of them, there is a priority order.

Aviate. Fly the plane. This is always first. The pilot must maintain the altitude, airspeed, and position in the air (attitude). Things can get busy in the cockpit, and a mechanical failure or some other unanticipated issue can divert a pilot’s attention from simply flying the plane. The Society of Aviation and Flight Educators notes:

A famous example of failure to follow the established aviation priorities is the crash of Eastern Airlines Flight 401. In December 1972, the crew of a Lockheed L-1011 TriStar became focused on the malfunction of a landing gear position indicator light for the nose gear. The plane subsequently descended into the Everglades northwest of Miami, killing 101 of the 176 people on board (two people died more than seven days after the accident).

Navigate. When you’re flying an aircraft, you need to know where you are and where you’re going. Whether the pilot is navigating or there’s a separate navigator onboard, their job is to monitor the flight and make adjustments as needed to get the plane to its destination. Mistakes in navigation can lead to loss of situational awareness and accidents.

Communicate. Air Traffic Control is the pilot’s friend. They direct flights to keep safe distances between planes and provide instructions for safe takeoffs and landings. Pilots communicate with ATC using protocols that must be followed or the communication fails. For example, the English language is the standard established by the International Civil Aviation Organization (ICAO) to ensure safety and clear communication. On initial contact with ATC, the pilot uses the “4 W’s” (who you’re calling, who you are, where you are, what you want).

* * *

From Cockpit to Keyboard

It seems like everything I do relates back to writing these days. Fortunately, a failure in the writing process isn’t as dangerous as in flying, but we might be able to map Aviate, Navigate, Communicate onto the writer’s job. Here’s a simplified look at the process:

Aviate: Write the book. Keep it moving forward. Don’t decide to clean out that closet once again because you’re looking for an excuse to avoid writing. And don’t rewrite Chapter One for the fortieth time to get it just right. TKZers: How do you keep moving forward? Do you allocate a certain number of words or hours per day to your work? How long does it take you to write a novel? 

Navigate: While you’re writing, keep an eye on where you’re going. Does each scene move the story forward, or are you getting bogged down in unnecessary subplots or long, boring backstory? TKZers: How do you avoid getting off course when writing?

Communicate: Editors, critique partners, and beta readers are the author’s friends. Use their input to revise and polish the story. Clear communication will enable the author to make the necessary changes. TKZers: What types of communication do you use to improve the final product?

* * *

So TKZers: Do you use a method like “Aviate, Navigate, Communicate” to complete your novels? Tell us about it.

 * * *

 

 

Knights in Manhattan begins on a flight that has encountered rough air. But there may be more turbulence inside the cabin than outside the airplane.

Click the image to go to the Amazon book page.

Creative Loafing

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by James Scott Bell
@jamesscottbell

Free Ai Generated Nap illustration and picture

Walt Whitman’s poem “Song of Myself” begins this way (spelling in original):

I celebrate myself, and sing myself,
And what I assume you shall assume,
For every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you.
I loafe and invite my soul,
I lean and loafe at my ease observing a spear of summer grass.

Walt was on to something, namely, it is much better to observe grass than to smoke it. Loafing is not about psychoactive stimulation. It’s about inviting your soul. 

Which is exactly what we should invite as writers. It is what makes our writing, our voice, unique. It is what a machine does not, and can never possess.

So just how do we invite our soul? We can practice creative loafing.

I had the privilege of knowing Dallas Willard, who was for many years a professor of philosophy at USC, where your humble scribe studied law. Willard was widely known for writing about the spiritual disciplines, e.g., prayer, fasting, simplicity, service, etc. I once asked him what he considered the most important discipline, and he immediately responded, “Solitude.”

That threw me at first. But the more I thought about it, the more it made sense. Solitude, which also includes silence, clears out the noise in our heads, the muck and mire, so we can truly listen.

“In silence,” Willard wrote, “we come to attend.”

Our world is not set up for solitude, silence, contemplation.

Boy howdy, how hard that is for us! According to a recent survey, Americans check their phones 205 times per day. Further:

  • 6% check their phones within the first 10 minutes of waking up.
  • 76% check their phones within five minutes of receiving a notification.
  • 7% use their phones while sitting on the porcelain throne.

Needless to say, this doesn’t “invite your soul.” Loafing, even boredom, does. As one neuroscientist puts it:

Boredom can actually foster creative ideas, refilling your dwindling reservoir, replenishing your work mojo and providing an incubation period for embryonic work ideas to hatch. In those moments that might seem boring, empty and needless, strategies and solutions that have been there all along in some embryonic form are given space and come to life. And your brain gets a much needed rest when we’re not working it too hard. Famous writers have said their most creative ideas come to them when they’re moving furniture, taking a shower, or pulling weeds. These eureka moments are called insight.

Learn how to loaf, I say! And it is a discipline. I take Sundays off from writing. It’s not easy. I feel myself wanting to write a “just a little” (which inevitably becomes “a lot”). I have to fight it. If I win the fight, I always feel refreshed and more creative on Monday.

Try this: Leave your phone in another room and sit alone in a chair for five minutes and don’t think about anything but your breath going in and out. You’ll be amazed how hard that is. But it’s a start. If you’re working on your WIP, take a few five-minute breaks to loaf and invite your soul. You’ll get better at it. And your work will get better, too.

I will finish with this moving story about silence.

A fellow enters a monastery and has to take a vow of silence. But once a year he can write one word on the chalkboard in front of the head monk.

The first year goes by and it’s really hard not to talk. Word Day comes around and the monk writes “The” on the chalkboard. The second year is really painful. When Word Day comes he scratches “food” on the chalkboard.

The third year is excruciating, the monk struggles through it, and when Word Day rolls around once more, he writes “stinks.” And the head monk looks at him and says, “What’s with you? You’ve been here for three years and all you’ve done is complain.”

How are you at creative loafing? 

Building a Mystery

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For years, my library colleagues would ask when I was going to write that library mystery. Afterall, I read mysteries, was a writer, and worked at library, so it seemed like a natural fit to them. While I thought about it I continued writing fantasy and science fiction.

Finally, in 2020, after I’d retired from the library, the desire to write a cozy library mystery novel grabbed me. As I finished the final novel in my Empowered series, I read a bunch more mysteries of all sorts, from Matthew Scudder to more Agatha Christie to Sara Rosett’s Murder on Location cozy series.

I also read books on writing mysteries: Mystery Writers of America’s How to Write a Mystery, How to Write Killer Fiction by Carolyn Wheat, our own KZB alum Nancy Cohen’s Writing the Cozy Mystery, Sara Rosett’s How to Outline a Cozy Mystery Workbook, as well as her Teachable course on writing cozies. Sara’s course also included interviews with cozy mystery authors like Lynn Cahoon and Anna Castle. I discovered very useful handouts at Castle’s website from a workshop she gave on mystery writing.

I read more mysteries, and watched mystery TV series like Midsomer Murders, Elementary, Monk, the new Father Brown series, Perry Mason, and Columbo.

My published fantasy novels had crime and mystery elements, so writing an actual murder mystery should be a snap, right?

I wasn’t surprised it wasn’t that easy. I consider actual mystery novels to be one of the hardest types of fiction to write, and took the challenge seriously, which was a good thing. From the time I began outlining my first library cozy mystery, then called Death Due, until I published the final version, A Shush Before Dying, over two years had passed. I wrote three different versions, with numerous outlines. I did a deep dive into upping my revision game after finishing the first draft.

The second book in the series, Book Drop Dead came faster, being completed in year.

I’m an outliner, who, once upon a time, discovery wrote (AKA “pantsed”) his novels. For me, figuring out story structure was the secret that unlocked being able to create a story that worked. Mysteries were no different.

Cozy mysteries, like other mysteries, usually center around a murder. For me, that meant learning who the murderer was, and why they committed the crime, before outlining the book. I began each book by creating an electronic document file which became a novel journal where I could brainstorm about the mystery, the killer’s shadow story (something I learned from our own James Scott Bell), spin out the web of suspects, background notes, and simple outlines I could flesh out later.

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Mystery foundation

These make up the foundation of the mystery I’m building, and key to my process is asking myself questions about each.

Killer: Who and why? What lead them to kill, and why did they murder the victim? How do they react when they learn they are being investigated by our sleuth-hero?

The Victim: Often someone who is despicable in at least some of the time, and often at the center of a conflict, but they can be something other than a jerk—quirky perhaps, misunderstood, or even a good person who ran afoul of a killer. What was their relationship with the killer?

The setting: the location and community where the murder takes place. For my own cozy mystery, the setting was easy: the public library. I wanted the era to be the 1980s, when I began my at-first accidental career. This was the library before the Internet, when the card catalog ruled and staff used “dumb” terminals to check out books, stamping the date dues on a label on a page at the front of the book.

The public library then and now is a community in its own right, as well as a meeting ground for other communities, which provide opportunities for all sorts of situations and characters. How does the setting shape the murder, and the investigation?

The sleuth-hero: What pushes them to investigate the murder instead of leaving it to the police? Amateur sleuths are often nosy, curious, driven to solve puzzles. This describes my librarian-sleuth Meg Booker. The hero may be motivated to solve the crime because of personal concern if a friend is the suspect or survival if they themselves fall under suspicion.

In other cases, it may be the sense that thing about the murder doesn’t fit the facts as the police see them. The hero must have a reason to investigate and discovering that reason is vital. In cozy mystery the reason is often personal. The sleuth may have a connection to the victim, or to the person the police believe is the killer, as is the case in my first Meg Booker mystery.

The Web of Suspects:  For me an ideal number of suspects is five to seven. The motivations can be similar, but it helps build the mystery if at least some have different motives for murder. For instance, two suspects might both be rivals with the murder victim for a job promotion, while three more have possible motives unrelated to the day job.

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Plotting

The next thing I like to tackle is my story structure. I’m a fan of our own James Scott Bell’s signposts, such as the opening Disturbance, the Doorway to Act II, and especially the Mirror Moment. I brainstorm how the murder plays out, how the sleuth’s investigation begins and progresses, and what the killer does in response.

I’m an outliner, so I began putting the mystery into a beat outline, with sign posts marked and key scenes laid out. I’ll do additional brainstorming in a novel journal, a separate electronic document.

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The Arc of Suspicion

I also work out what I call “the arc of suspicion,” which is the sleuth-hero and readers progression in who they suspect committed the crime. I posted about this here. I’m going to crib from that earlier post and share the beats of the suspicion arc. I don’t necessarily write all these out, but keep them in mind as the story progresses, brainstorming as needed:

  1. The arc begins with noticing something is off about someone’s behavior, or a set of circumstances.
  2. Doubt ensues.
  3. Then, discovering “evidence” which increases suspicion. This can be an overheard conversation, reading a note or email, seeing a meeting without hearing what is being said, looking at a pattern of behavior, perhaps behavior out of character for the suspect, etc.
  4. Discovering a lie, or a false alibi can heighten suspicion.
  5. There can be a deepening fixation on a suspect’s behavior, words, deeds, and trying to figure out what they were thinking, why they did what they did, etc.
  6. Acting on that suspicion to the point of taking risks and putting yourself in potential jeopardy. This often precedes the confrontation/reveal in the final act of a mystery.
  7. Given that mysteries usually have multiple suspects, there will be a point where the sleuth (and the reader) rule out a person because of evidence, alibi, or learning what the secret was that made a particular individual act suspicious to the main character.
  8. Of course, heroes and readers often suspect more than one character at the same time, so the arcs can overlap. Sometimes the behavior or evidence is one thing, which leads to doubt about a particular person. Doubt which might deepen to suspicion or might simmer in the background. Or, even forgotten for the moment, until the end, when new evidence makes the sleuth suddenly suspect that person with a cold-in-the-bones feeling.
  9. Finally, the sleuth’s suspicions lead to the actual killer and/or can lead the killer to them.

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Drafting

As I write the first draft, I’ll come up with new ideas, clues etc., and, if they make the grade, will add them to my outline.

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Revision and feedback

Revision is where I work to fix plot holes, add missing clues, clarify motives if needed, along with the usual revision tasks of improving scenes, pacing, characterization, setting details etc. I then send the revised novel to my beta readers, who give me invaluable feedback on whether the mystery worked for them, where they were surprised, if they guessed the identity of the murderer, etc. I then make any additional changes based their feedback.

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The resources which helped me learn how to build a mystery

Nancy Cohen’s Writing the Cozy Mystery. Nancy’s book provides an instructive break down of the elements of a cozy mystery.

Sara Rosett’s How to Outline a Cozy Mystery. Rosett  gives the building blocks of a cozy mystery, as well as different outlining methods, tips on clues and red-herrings, conventions of cozies etc. While Rosett’s online course on writing a cozy mystery appears to be no longer available, the book still is.

Carolyn Wheat How to Write Killer Fiction. Wheat looks “the funhouse of mystery” as well as the “rollercoaster of thriller,” and reading the book gives a useful comparison between the two as well as the elements of each.

Hallie Ephron Writing and Selling Your Mystery Novel. Ephron’s book is a deep dive into the elements of mystery, looking at plotting, characters, mystery, sense of place, revision, as well as advice on publishing, both traditional and self-publishing.

Mystery Writers of America How to Write a Mystery. A collection of essays by mystery masters also covers the different aspects of mystery fiction.

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So, this is how I build a mystery. If you write mysteries, what tips you do have?

Reader Friday-Food For Thought

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Saw this in cyberspace:

Somewhere there’s an Aunt Betty roaming the grocery aisles looking for the ingredients to make her famous Thanksgiving dish that no one in the family likes.

Is there an Aunt Betty in your family?     🙂

 

Ahem…

What is your least favorite Thanksgiving food?

I know, I know—we usually talk about our favorites, right? But today is different.

My least favorite Thanksgiving food is—wow! I really hate to admit it, but it’s pumpkin pie. Especially store-bought pumpkin pie. I’ve just never been a fan of pumpkin anything.

I had to keep it a secret for a long time because my mother and both grandmothers were so proud of their pumpkin creations . . . and I didn’t want to hurt their feelings. So I would take some and make sure no one was watching when—well, you get it.

How about you?

Is there a Thanksgiving food you’ve always hated? And maybe had to hide it like I did? It’s okay, go ahead and spill those hated beans. You’re safe in these halls.

 

 

True Crime Thursday – Fumbled Felony by Clumsy Crook

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r/Wellthatsucks - a turkey on a cutting board

by Debbie Burke

Happy Thanksgiving!

Today’s True Crime occurred on the early morning of Thanksgiving 2013 when a clumsy character attempted to rob a Miami Gardens, Florida gas station.

According to reports by odee.com, CBSNews.com, and NBCMiami.com, security video shows Johnny Anton Love, then 22, entering the store armed with a 9 mm Glock. He jumps over the counter and demands money from the clerk. In the process, he drops his hat and stumbles back and forth to find it. Next he fumbles with a plastic bag, trying to open it to carry the cash.

Then he puts his gun down while he takes his time choosing candy and gum from sales displays.

The clerk remains calm, suggesting he take some beer also. While Love meanders to a cooler in the back of the store, the clerk sounds the alarm.

Love loads up the plastic bag with beer. When he exits the store, the bag busts like an overstuffed turkey. Bottles roll around the parking lot. Love is apparently preoccupied with trying to stuff his gun back in his pants and corral the escaping beer, and doesn’t notice the police officer who responded to the alarm.

He is taken into custody without incident.

The merchandise and $722 cash were recovered and Love spent Thanksgiving in jail held without bond.

Overstuffing a turkey can mean a mess to clean up and increased risk of salmonella. 

Overstuffing a plastic bag can mean arrest and jail. 

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True Crime Thursday always falls on Thanksgiving, reminding me how thankful Io am to be part of The Kill Zone family and for the many writing friends I’ve met through TKZ.

Wishing you all a day of gratitude, good food, and good memories with loved ones.