Category Archives: Writing

True Crime Thursday – “Bear” is Accessory to Insurance Fraud

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Yathin S Krishnappa, CC BY-SA 3.0 <https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0>, via Wikimedia Commons

by Debbie Burke

You’ve probably seen TV commercials that warn your auto insurance may not cover damage by wild animals.

Bear attacks on vehicles do happen. Here’s a news story from Colorado: 

In the video, I don’t know whether the humans’ actions to free the perpetrator should be considered “rescue” or “aiding and abetting a felon.”

Today’s true crime takes bear attacks to a whole ‘nother level: insurance fraud.

The hilarious Dave Barry sounded the alert on this case.

According to the California Department of Insurance, multiple insurance companies paid out more than $140K for damage supposedly caused by a bear to three different vehicles…on the same night, in the same Lake Arrowhead location.

What are the odds?

According to an April 2026 press release from the California Department of Insurance:

“The defendants used a person in a bear suit to stage fake attacks on high-end vehicles, then submitted fraudulent claims seeking payouts from insurance companies.”

Security cam video was provided to various insurers to support claims from three different vehicle owners of interior damage to a 2010 Rolls Royce, a 2015 Mercedes G63 AMG, and a 2022 Mercedes E350 on the same night in January 2024.

Photo credit: California Dept. of Insurance

 

 

Investigators later became suspicious of the coincidence. The California Department of Fish and Wildlife determined the “bear” was actually a human in a bear suit. The furry costume and metal claws were found in the home of the suspects. The claws are cooking tools to shred barbecued meat.

 

Credit: California Department of Insurance

 

 

 

Hint: Real bears don’t leave neat, evenly spaced scratch marks.

Alfiya Zuckerman, 39, of Valley Village, Ruben Tamrazian, 26, of Glendale, and Vahe Muradkhanyan, 32, of Glendale each pleaded no contest and were sentenced to 180 days in jail (weekend jail time), two years supervised probation, and restitution. A fourth suspect, Ararat Chirkinian, 39, of Glendale, faces a preliminary hearing in September 2026.

TKZers: Comments on this furry fraud?

The Crime Fiction Evolution

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By PJ Parrish

As many of you regulars know, I have retired from fulltime novel writing. Still keeping my toes in the short fiction waters but the demands of turning out a novel per year (or more) in today’s market just isn’t for me anymore. (No pity sought. I am very happy with this decision!)

But…

My co-author and sister Kelly has talked me into re-looking at an unpublished manuscript we wrote several years ago. It wasn’t part of our series, and was also a departure from our usual hardboiled style. I’d say it was more tilted toward romantic suspense with a high humor quotient. We offered it up to our then-publisher, who turned it down. They said they didn’t know how to market it — that it was “neither fish nor fowl.” It didn’t really fit their definition for what then qualified as romantic suspense. The editor said, “Your heart is too dark.”

Which I took as a compliment. So we filed it away. Until this week, when Kelly opened it up.

Guess what? It didn’t smell. You know, like that chunk of brie that you forgot you had and it turned into an alien life form in the sliced turkey meat refrigerator drawer. In fact, when I started reading it, I thought it was pretty darn good.

Good enough to sell? Who knows? But we’re gonna give it a go. Mainly because I think the market has become more flexible in recent years. I get this notion mainly from the books I have been reading, and because I just finished my 20th year as banquet chair for the Edgar Awards, I have a front row seat to what is fresh in our genre. I’m getting the sense that changes are afoot in crime fiction, a mini-revolution of sorts. The old barriers between hard and soft fiction have become more blurred. I get the impression that readers nowadays are not so hung up on where exactly a title has to be shelved at a bookstore. And the advent of online publishing has created more space for those quirky books that don’t fit easily into categories.

I’ve been doing a lot of research on trends this week and found some interesting commentary. Our genre has long been a fiction cornerstone, but it’s undergoing an evolution. The classic tropes are still with us, but authors now are pushing boundaries, cross-breeding influences and finding new audiences willing to take chances on edgier suspense.

Some new trends I found in my digging:

  • Cross-Pollenization. Today’s mysteries now blend with other genres — “mystery-horror,” mystery-sci-fi” and especially mystery-fantasy. The old labels feel stifling. Readers seem to be hungry for richer, more complex books.
  • Psychological depth. Modern mysteries appear to be tiling focus more toward character than plot. Writers are plumbing the depths of motivation and the gray areas of morality. Modern mysteries and thrillers explore the human psyche, and feature deep backstories, and complex interpersonal relationships.
  • Dark Crozies. Sure, the village amateur sleuth is still popular, but now we’re seeing even cozy writers dealing with more serious themes — family secrets, personal demons, and heavier societal topics such as institutional racism, mental health, and non-traditional chosen families.These new shadows provide compelling contrasts to the lighter settings.
  • The Rise of Tech. Another trend is the incorporation of technology in crime narratives, mirroring its pervasive impact on our lives. Tech-savvy detectives and cybercrimes are increasingly featured in plots.
  • Fusion of Fact and Fiction. True crime has found a new home within the realm of crime fiction. Inspired by real-life events, these narratives are blurring the line between fact and fiction, giving readers a blend of authenticity and imagination.

I guess this can be scary to us Luddites, purists, and traditionalists. But I think it’s exciting. Our genre, from Poe through Hammitt to Connelly, has undergone change and tumult before. Maybe we are due for another new wave.

As author Valerie Webster puts it, “The landscape of crime fiction has become delightfully unpredictable, reshaping the genre’s expectations and norms. The once rigid boundaries of classic whodunits, thrillers, and noir have transformed into a fluid arena, thriving on audacious experimentation.”

She suggests that crime fiction has evolved from linear “whodunits” to complex psychological narratives that prioritize “whydunits.” The focus has shifted from just solving the puzzle to delving deep into motivations and psychology of the human mind. “Consequently,” she says, “crime fiction’s palette has grown richer, delving into the perpetrator’s psyche and blurring the lines between villain and victim.”

So maybe my book — “niether fish nor fowl” — is actually akin to a turducken. A little weird, not traditional, but definitely juicy and fit for an adventurous palate.

Who knows? Maybe everything in life is just about good timing.

I’m not going to overthink this. I’m going back into the old manuscript this week for some strenuous rewriting.  I’ll keep you posted on what comes out of the oven.

 

How to Spot and Plug Plot Holes

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Caution! Plot holes!

Nothing yanks me out of a story faster than a plot hole. If they’re really stupid, I get mad. And I quit reading or watching. That disconnect doesn’t just “break immersion”, it breaks trust, and it quietly murders your relationship with your reader/viewer.

Plot holes can happen anywhere, but they’re most common in mysteries, thrillers, and action stories, where the engine of the story is cause-and-effect.

At their core, plot holes are logic problems with motives, chronology, and missions.

Motives for Heroes

When readers say, “I don’t buy it,” they’re usually talking about motive.

  • Does what your hero wants make sense?
  • Do your hero’s actions make sense and connect with his motive?

Extra Plot-Hole Patrol Tip: Make sure the hero’s motive isn’t just logical, but urgent. If the hero can shrug and go get tacos, your plot is in trouble. Stakes are the duct tape that keeps decisions from wobbling.

Motives for Villains

Villains are plot-hole factories when their plans are vague, inconsistent, or powered by “because the writer needed it.”

  • Do we understand why he’s doing what he’s doing?
  • Do we understand what the bad guy’s plan is?

Extra Tip: “I’m evil” is not a plan. Even chaotic villains have an internal logic: a need, a wound, a belief, a fear, or a payoff. If the villain’s motive changes scene to scene, the audience notices.

Chronology

Chronology is where stories accidentally teleport.

Make sure that your characters are doing the things they need to do in the right order. Don’t have them break into the Art Museum before they’ve learned how to disarm the alarm system.

Extra Tip: Time is sneaky. If your story has travel, deadlines, injuries, weather, or “we only have six hours,” do a quick sanity check: How long would this actually take? If your character drives across town in three minutes during rush hour, you will lose your readers.

Missions

This is the “what are we doing and how are we doing it?” category. Mission confusion creates plot holes because the audience can’t track what should logically happen next.

  • Is your good guys’ plan clear?
  • What are they going after?
  • How are they going to do it?
  • And what do they need to do it?
  • How are the bad guys going to counter the hero’s actions?
  • Does the villain have a logical reaction to the hero’s successes?
  • Does the hero have a logical reaction to the villain’s roadblocks?

Extra Tip: Track resources like a hawk. Weapons, money, passwords, keys, vehicles, evidence, magic rules, phone battery, injury level, allies who know the plan. A shocking number of plot holes are really just “Wait…where did that come from?” problems.

Here are Three Ways to Avoid Logic Breaks

1. The Villain’s Timeline

From The Villain’s Journey by Debbie Burke, even when he is off camera, track what the villain is doing in every scene to stymie the hero.

2. The Villain’s Plan

Create a step-by-step plan for the villain’s goal. Each step should happen in your story, even if some of them are off camera.

Picture the villain with their own off-screen Netflix series running parallel to your story. What scenes are happening that we don’t see? Who are they calling, bribing, stalking, moving, framing, sabotaging?

A helpful test: if you can’t summarize the villain’s plan in 3 to 7 steps, it’s probably not clear enough in your head yet, which means it definitely won’t be clear on the page.

3. The Hero’s Knowledge and Logic Check

Go through each scene and ask: what does the hero know here about what the villain is doing? Based on what he knows, what is his next logical step?

Extra Idea: Do this for the reader, too. What does the reader know at this moment? What are you inviting them to assume? A lot of plot holes are really “the author forgot what they told the audience” holes.

A Few More Plot Hole Plugs

The “Because/Therefore” Chain

For every major beat: this happens because of that, and therefore this next thing happens. If you find yourself writing “and then,” pause. “And then” is where plot holes breed like rabbits.

The Reverse Outline

After you draft, create a scene-by-scene outline of what actually happens. You’ll instantly spot missing steps, logic leaps, and scenes that depend on information nobody has yet.

The Continuity Bible

Especially for series, thrillers, and anything with big conspiracies: keep a simple master doc for names, dates, rules, injuries, secrets, locations, and “who knows what when.”

Eyes on the Story

And finally, the best defense against plot holes and logic problems is another pair of eyes. Have trusted writer friends, story coaches, and editors read your book or script and give you feedback. Ask your readers to track your plot and make sure it makes sense.

Because here’s the truth: you can’t always see your own plot holes. You built the whole world. You know what you meant. Your reader only knows what’s on the page, and they will notice when your story skips a beat.

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Digital Detectives: The Role of Cyber Forensics in Modern Crime Stories

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By Jennifer Graeser Dornbush

When I was growing up, evidence meant fingerprints, fibers, and blood spatter.
Today, we also find enormous amounts of evidence in our digital prints: browser histories, cell phone pings, and metadata buried in a cloud server halfway around the world.

Crime scenes have a giant presence online.

I’ve spent years learning how investigators read the physical world for truth. But in the last decade, a new kind of evidence has changed everything. The next big clue isn’t under a microscope, it’s inside a smartphone.

For storytellers, that shift opens an entirely new frontier. If you’re writing crime fiction and ignoring digital forensics, you’re leaving some of your richest material untapped. But it’s also tricky because what we “watch” or “observe” on a screen isn’t very action-focused as a plot line.

Today, we’re stepping into the world of cyber forensics and how to use this evidence in your next crime fiction.

What Is Cyber Forensics?

In the simplest terms, cyber or digital forensics is the process of identifying, preserving, analyzing, and presenting data from electronic devices in a way that stands up in court.

If traditional forensics examines fingerprints and fibers, digital forensics examines pixels and packets, the trails left by our phones, laptops, GPS units, and cloud accounts.

The real-world process

When a device is seized, investigators create a “forensic image,” a bit-by-bit copy that captures everything: deleted files, timestamps, cached data, and metadata. That image becomes the foundation for analysis. Information Analysts then use specialized software to reconstruct timelines, recover communications, and verify authenticity of an individual’s usage.

Every action is documented to maintain the chain of custody and keep evidence tracked, secure, and court-admissible.

Digital forensics branches into specialties:

●      Computer forensics – analyzing desktops and hard drives.

●      Mobile forensics – recovering data from phones, tablets, and wearables.

●      Network forensics – tracking online traffic, hacking, and IP traces.

●      Cloud forensics – locating and authenticating data stored on remote servers.

The process may sound technical, but at its heart, it’s still detective work. Each byte is a breadcrumb, and every breadcrumb tracks a trail where a criminal or victim has been.

Where Digital Evidence Hides

A great mystery writer knows how to hide a clue in plain sight. The same is true of digital evidence.

1. Smartphones

Modern phones are portable black boxes. They store call logs, texts, deleted images, app data, GPS trails, and even sensor information that can pinpoint motion and location. In fiction, a single recovered text or photo can flip a plot.

Example: A victim’s fitness app records 200 extra steps at 2 a.m. proof she was still alive hours after the suspect claimed she was dead.

2. Laptops and Cloud Storage

Documents, emails, cached passwords, and file-creation times often reveal motive or premeditation. Cloud backups extend that reach: deleting something locally rarely means it’s gone.

3. Social Media and Messaging Apps

Posts, private messages, likes, and geotags create a map of a suspect’s or victim’s personal life. For writers, social platforms can expose contradictions: the killer who posts a cheerful vacation photo minutes after committing a crime. The victim who texted an irate boyfriend before disappearing.

4. Smart Devices

Doorbell cameras, smart speakers, thermostats, and watches all record direct evidence of where a victim or criminal has been. Investigators now recover voices, motion data, even room temperatures to build timelines.

5. The Digital Silence

Sometimes what isn’t there matters most, a phone suddenly powered off, an erased drive, an hour missing from security footage. In storytelling, absence of evidence can shout louder than its presence.

Every byte is a witness; the challenge is deciding which ones are telling the truth.

Turning Data into Drama

As a writer I often worry that using too much digital forensics bogs my story down, makes it uninteresting, or relies on telling instead of showing. After all, we want our characters in action. And watching someone stare at a screen or pick through files is very passive and very boring.

The secret to treating digital discovery is to use as little exposition as possible– sometimes you have to describe video footage or a computer file. Where we can get the most punch is when we use digital evidence as revelation… aka: a turning point in the plot. The found digital evidence can be a small, medium, or big turning point. But it has to count as something that shifts the plot investigation in a new direction.

●      Anchor the data to emotion. A recovered voicemail is about the message, but also the emotional meaning to the person who hears it.

●      Pace the reveal. Instead of unloading a list of findings, let information surface gradually, each clue raising new questions.

●      Show the cost. What does it feel like to invade a victim’s inbox or scroll through a dead child’s messages? Use sensory detail to humanize the act of investigation as the investigator is uncovering the evidence.

●      Avoid jargon overload. Let characters translate for the reader: “The timestamp’s off. Someone changed it.” That’s all you need. Unless your character is a digital analyst. Then, lean into the jargon as part of her character

The Emotional Edge

Behind every password and pixel is a person. And humans are driven by emotion. Use that in writing. Here’s how:
Bringing Humanity to the Data

The best crime stories are seeded in motive. Digital evidence should never replace emotion; it should reveal it.

●      A deleted text exposes regret.

●      A GPS trail shows obsession.

●      A search history lays bare guilt.

●      A detective scrolls through a suspect’s messages, what do they feel? Curiosity? Pity? Revulsion?

●      Think of each digital discovery as a confession waiting to be interpreted.

●      What is a detective’s reaction when she hacks into a victim’s private photos?

●      What happens when a journalist exposes data meant to stay sealed?

●      How do loved ones feel when a phone becomes evidence instead of memory?

Use emotional reactions of characters to heighten empathy, build the plot, and ratchet up suspense as they uncover a digital footprint.

Realism Without the Textbook

You don’t need to be a hacker to write digital authenticity. You just need to understand procedure and respect accuracy.

Start with credible sources

●      The U.S. Department of Justice’s Digital Evidence Guide outlines best practices for law enforcement.

●      The National Institute of Standards and Technology (NIST) publishes clear, publicly available frameworks.

●      The FBI Cyber Division offers summaries of current threats and tools.

●      Podcasts such as Darknet Diaries or The Forensic Lunch reveal real cases in accessible language.

Write lean

A single correct detail is worth more than pages of exposition. If you know what a “write-blocker” or “hash value” is, mention it once to show expertise, then move on. An easy hack for this is to have the digital expert character explain it to a non-techie character.

Consult real experts

A quick interview with a local cyber-crime investigator can provide nuances no textbook will, tone, pressure, emotional toll.

Authenticity doesn’t come from showing off what you know. It comes from knowing just enough to stay believable.

The Digital Detective

Every generation of investigators develops new instincts. The digital detective, whether real or fictional, reads data like body language.

They’re patient, analytical, and often brilliant. They see patterns others miss. But make sure yours is more than a brain behind a keyboard.

Give them the full range of character depth:

●      A cyber expert who still keeps notes by hand.

●      A genius coder who’s terrible at reading people.

●      A hacker turned consultant wrestling with guilt.

Common Mistakes to Avoid

1.     Tech magic. Don’t let characters “trace the IP in seconds” or “hack the Pentagon before lunch.” Real analysis takes time, warrants, and patience.

2.     One-click evidence. Data rarely tells a single truth. Circumstantial evidence here requires that investigators put all together all the evidence to create a line of reasoning that leads to a single suspect.

3.     Static scenes. Fiction can quickly turn into non-fiction with digital evidence trails. But no one wants to read computer analysis. BORING! Keep it quick, fast, and show how data changes the direction of plot.

4.     Outdated references. Technology evolves fast. Double-check that the apps, devices, and terminology in your story still exist.

5.     Emotionless experts. Readers connect to people, not software. Give your digital detectives personal reactions to what they discover.

The Forensic Thread

When I teach writing workshops, I remind authors that fictional forensics is about culling what is possible, not what isprobable. Whatever thread you pull on doesn’t have to be probable. It only has to be possible. Have fun with evidence and technology! Be inventive!

In my own fiction, I use cyber forensics the way I use autopsies, not for shock value, but to reveal truth. A recovered email can carry much emotional weight when it’s tied to character and motive.

Science gives us technology; humanity gives us connection. When you use cyber forensics, balance both.

The Future of Digital Crime

The frontier keeps expanding. Artificial intelligence can now detect manipulated images and generate false ones. Blockchain records are being introduced as tamper-proof evidence. Entire crime scenes can be reconstructed in virtual reality.

That evolution is thrilling for real life investigators… as much as it is for storytellers. Imagine writing a case where the killer uses deepfakes to create an alibi, or where investigators chase a suspect across multiple metaverses in VR.

But beneath the technology, the essential human question never changes: Why?

Technology will always change how crimes can be carried out… and solved. The corruption of human heart will always determine motive. And motive will always be the pulse of every great crime story.

Jennifer Dornbush is an author, screenwriter, and forensic specialist who brings crime stories to life with authenticity and heart. With a background rooted in real-world forensics and a passion for crafting unforgettable mysteries, Jennifer offers readers and viewers a front-row seat to the intersection of science, justice, and human nature. Jennifer’s crime expertise has made her a sought-after speaker, consultant, and educator. Through her webinars and master courses, Jennifer guides writers in melding suspenseful storytelling with forensic realism to the screen and page. Meet her at www.jenniferdornbush.com

Tales of an Author Event

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Tales of an Author Event
Terry Odell

Display of Terry Odell's books

This past weekend, I had the opportunity to participate in a library’s annual “Mountain of Authors” event. I’ve been part of this event for quite a number of years, but this year, things were different. There was a new event organizer, which might have accounted for some of the changes, but I doubt she was working alone.

In the past, as in this year, the event includes two programs: a panel discussion and a keynote speaker with time in between to encourage library patrons to visit the authors’ tables. It takes place in the library’s meeting room and is open to the public at no charge. Tables for authors who’d been approved to participate were set up in the periphery of the room. My guesstimate, since I never actually counted the tables, was somewhere in the neighborhood of thirty author tables. They also used to include lunch for the authors, given the event ran from noon to five, not counting setup and breakdown time. This year, only water and a couple of packaged snacks.

Also this year, they decided to accommodate more authors. Authors were also permitted to bring their own tables, which increased the number of participants even more. Over eighty. And they spread them out through the entire upper level of the library, which is a huge space. A few authors were inside the program room, but most tables were set up outside the venue, including mine. My guess is traditionally published authors got priority for premium space, but that’s just a guess. Given that was one of the questions on the application form, I’m calling it an educated guess.

They tried to assign tables based on genres and my space was in the “Mystery Authors” section. That being the case, I decided to focus on my Mapleton series when deciding which books to bring. When I checked my inventory, I realized I had only the three newest Mapletons, so I added some stand alone romantic suspense books as well.

Events like this are a time investment. It’s an hour drive down the mountain for me. Then it’s unloading everything and setting up my table. The program was scheduled to start at noon, and I arrived at eleven to set up. My assigned section turned out to be in an area adjacent to … nothing. A couple of activity rooms, but nowhere near any books, which is what library patrons are most interested in. Thus, there was very little traffic to the tables in that section, and what traffic there was consisted primarily of the other 79 authors wanting to see who was there, say hi, get ideas for their own tables.

Many of us were repeat attendees, so it was nice to see familiar faces. It was nice to chat with the authors on nearby tables. The author to one side of me was there with his first book and were excited to go to events. They had a huge stand up banner with quotes of all the great reviews his book had gotten. His wife was the “talker-upper” and did the book pitching.

On the other side of me was a man who’d brought the most recent book in his series because it was the only one he’d indie published and the only one he could get copies of. His table was the first one on our side of the “aisle” and as people entered, he jumped up from behind his table and walked up to everyone coming in, and gave his sales pitch. I got the feeling that a lot of those people felt they were being encroached upon, so I stayed behind my table and, after they’d left him, invited them to partake of some of my swag to get a conversation started.

The types of people I encountered,no different from those I’ve encountered at every event I’ve ever been part of:

  • “If I make eye contact, I’ll have to buy something, so I’ll scan the table and walk by.”
  • “I like these books, but I didn’t bring any money today.”
  • “Do these come in ebook?”
  • “Can I get it in audio?”
  • “I need to check all the tables before I buy anything.” (After reading the back cover copy on every book I had on display).
  • And then there was the guy who wanted to read a sample, so he picked up the book and opened it to a random page about 1/4 of the way through. So much for hooking readers on page one!

On the bright side, nobody asked where the restrooms were.

My overall takeaways?

The setup was too large, and some areas were VERY low traffic.

People who come to libraries tend to borrow books, not buy them, which was no different this year. Attending these functions is more about meeting people, getting your name out there.

Chatting with people instead of staring at a computer screen is a healthy change of pace.

Did I sell any books? Yes. Two of my stand alone romantic suspense books, so if you’re all about the money, this was a loss. On the other hand, people did pick up my post it notes and business cards, so my name is in front of a lot more people.

The author and wife pair sold one. The get up and grab-’em guy swapped books with another author and I think he had one sale. What was interesting was one woman he’d approached had been an exchange student in the town in Italy where one of his books was set. He didn’t have that book with him, but she went to the nearest Barnes & Noble and bought it, then brought it back to the venue so he could sign it.

Would it have been better had my table been somewhere else? Maybe. Peeking into the program room showed mostly empty seats, so maybe the program wasn’t a draw to begin with. The other side of the library (where the books are) might have been a better location.

Would I do it again with the same setup? I don’t know, but I have a year to think about it.

What about you, TKZers? Any stories to share?

Find me at Substack with Writings and Wanderings

Deadly Ambitions
Peace in Mapleton doesn’t last. Police Chief Gordon Hepler is already juggling a bitter ex-mayoral candidate who refuses to accept election results and a new council member determined to cut police department’s funding.
Meanwhile, Angie’s long-delayed diner remodel uncovers an old journal, sparking her curiosity about the girl who wrote it. But as she digs for answers, is she uncovering more than she bargained for?
Now, Gordon must untangle political maneuvering, personal grudges, and hidden agendas before danger closes in on the people he loves most.
Deadly Ambitions delivers small-town intrigue, political tension, and page-turning suspense rooted in both history and today’s ambitions.

Terry Odell is an award-winning author of Mystery and Romantic Suspense, although she prefers to think of them all as “Mysteries with Relationships.”

Motional Intelligence – New Tool to Build Characters

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by Debbie Burke

Spell check thinks the word “motional” is a typo. But it isn’t.

Motional Intelligence: The Power of Movement in Leadership is the title of a new book by Dr. Scott Allison and Dr. George Goethals, professors emeriti at University of Richmond. Their premise is that humans register first impressions of others, not from physical appearance nor what they say, but from how they move.

They write: “Motion is core to social interaction. Before anyone speaks, a conversation has already begun…Speech came late. Motion came first.”  Motional intelligence sounded like a great potential tool for writers to build more interesting characters. So I reached out to Scott Allison to learn more.

Here’s our interview:

Debbie Burke: Thanks for agreeing to talk with me about Motional Intelligence. Would you please explain this concept to Kill Zone readers?

Scott Allison: Yes indeed. Here’s our definition of Motional Intelligence, which we abbreviate as MI. MI is the capacity to use one’s body movements intentionally to communicate and influence others, to accurately perceive, decode, and interpret the body movements of others across contexts, and to regulate one’s own movements – and one’s interpretations of others – in response to shifting social demands. So you can see there are 3 aspects of MI – an expressive component (how we display our own motions), an interpretive component (how we decode others’ motions), and a regulatory component (how we plan and adjust our motions to situational demands). We do these three things effortlessly and often without conscious awareness.

DB: What inspired you to write this book?

SA: One day, somewhere between burgers and coffee, my co-author George Goethals and I shared an epiphany: everything we were analyzing – heroism, leadership, empathy, influence, conflict – depended less on what people said and more on how they moved. Yet psychology had no comprehensive framework for this. This book began the moment we realized that these motions are not incidental to human life; they are human life. According to evolutionary biology, speech came late, and motion came first. George and I just had to write about this!

DB: You talk about familiar ways to measure intelligence like IQ (logical reasoning, problem-solving) and EI (emotional intelligence) but you say MI (motional intelligence) is different. Can you expand on that?

SA: Motional intelligence (MI) is one of many aspects of overall intelligence. MI is not the same as emotional intelligence (EI). EI centers on the perception, regulation, and expression of emotions, typically through facial cues, vocal tone, and affective appraisal. MI, by contrast, isolates a different communicative channel entirely: the dynamic language of body movement.

DB: Is “body language” the same as motional signals?

SA: Yes, in the sense that we use our bodies to communicate, to persuade, and to trigger emotional responses in others.

DB: What character/personality traits are revealed through MI?

SA: Pretty much every personality trait than humans possess can be revealed through motion. Kindness is revealed through a soft posture, a smile, a tilt of the head, and the reaching out of a hand. Dominance is revealed through very different posture, facial expression, and use of limbs. Before anyone speaks, a conversation has already begun. A stranger’s shoulders soften as you approach; a friend leans in before offering a word; a colleague’s foot angles toward the door long before they admit they’re late for another meeting. We live inside a constant choreography of meaning – signals given and received, often without our awareness.

DB: Do you have ideas how writers could use MI to bring fictional characters to life?

SA: Authors of fiction can use MI to animate characters in ways that transcend dialogue and emotional description. Rather than merely telling readers what a character feels, writers can reveal personality, motives, status, intentions, and inner conflict through patterns of movement—posture, gait, gesture, rhythm, pacing, stillness, spatial orientation, and bodily timing. A character with high MI, for example, may subtly mirror another person’s posture to build trust, regulate the emotional climate of a room through calm and deliberate movement, or communicate dominance through economy of motion rather than overt aggression. Conversely, low MI might appear in awkward timing, invasive spatial behavior, rigid posture, excessive fidgeting, or an inability to interpret others’ bodily signals accurately. Fiction writers can also use MI developmentally: a character’s evolving movement patterns may symbolize psychological transformation, growing confidence, moral corruption, intimacy, trauma, or heroic maturation. In this way, bodily motion becomes a narrative language that conveys character identity and relational dynamics at a pre-verbal level, making fictional people feel vividly alive and authentic.

DB: Writers are advised to show, don’t tell. Can you suggest how MI might be used to show relationships between characters? How about to show their conflicts?

SA: MI offers fiction writers a powerful “show, don’t tell” toolkit for revealing relationships and conflict through bodily movement rather than explicit explanation. Healthy relationships can be conveyed through movement synchrony—characters mirroring posture, walking in step, sharing relaxed rhythms, anticipating one another’s actions, or comfortably occupying shared space—thereby signaling trust, intimacy, affection, or familiarity. Romantic attraction may appear in subtle orientation cues, lingering gestures, or softened movement, while friendship may emerge through playful physical ease and unguarded posture. Conflict, though, often disrupts bodily coordination through avoidance, rigid posture, pacing, competing movement rhythms, territorial spacing, or emotional stillness. Writers can also show relational transformation over time by altering these movement patterns, allowing bodily synchrony, distance, hesitation, or tension to function as a nonverbal narrative language that makes fictional relationships feel psychologically authentic and vividly alive.

DB: I can imagine ways that misreads of a character’s MI could lead to misinterpretations and plot complications. You’re also a film expert and co-author of the book Reel Heroes and Villains. Can you give movie examples where MI (or lack thereof) was instrumental in driving the plot?

SA: Absolutely. MI is often central to cinematic storytelling because film is an inherently movement-based medium. In The Dark Knight, Heath Ledger’s Joker possesses a dark form of MI. He constantly manipulates spatial dynamics, bodily unpredictability, and movement rhythm to destabilize others psychologically. His erratic gestures, invasive proximity, asymmetrical posture, and sudden stillness generate tension and fear, driving much of the film’s emotional chaos. In The Devil Wears Prada, Meryl Streep’s Miranda Priestly uses highly regulated MI to project authority. Her economy of motion, precise pacing, controlled stillness, and minimal gestures create an aura of dominance that shapes every interaction around her. In Napoleon Dynamite, Napolean’s social awkwardness emerges through stiff posture, delayed reactions, unusual gait, and poor synchrony with peers, creating both comedy and emotional isolation.

DB: Where can readers find your new book?

SA: Our MI book is available on Amazon or Barnes and Noble. There is a kindle version, too.

DB: Thank you, Scott, for exploring this interesting topic.

SA: My pleasure and thank you for showing an interest!

~~~

TKZers: Can you think of film characters who use MI especially effectively? Do you see ways MI might help your work in progress?

~~~

Dr. Scott Allison and Dr. George Goethals graciously gave me major assistance with the psychology of villains for The Villain’s Journey: How to Create Villains Readers Love to Hate. 

Please check out The Villain’s Journey at: 

Amazon

Barnes & Noble

Bookshop.org

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Beach Blonde Betrayal

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By Elaine Viets

Let me tell you about my new Florida mystery, Beach Blonde Betrayal.  Yes, I came up with that tongue-twister of a title, and I’m already tripping over it

The second book in my Florida Beach series explores some favorite themes: love, trust, and betrayal. Especially betrayal, by friends and lovers. Because this mystery is set in Florida, it’s chockfull of colorful characters.

It also has Florida Men, Florida Women and plenty of Florida weirdness. In fact, that’s how the mystery starts. Here’s a sneak preview of the first chapter:

Chapter 1 (excerpt)

Dean and I were debating our favorite subject: Florida weirdness. There was another murder, and it was gruesome, even for the Sunshine State.

I should know. I’m Norah McCarthy, a genuine Florida native, and I own the Florodora apartments. My apartment building is on the ocean in Peerless Point, halfway between Fort Lauderdale and Miami. Thanks to the perfect weather, the beach was swarming with tourists, so we retreated inland. Today, Dean and I were crunching on the pea gravel path along a canal in Peerless Park.

Dean lives in the apartment next to mine. He’s not only my tenant. He’s my lover, boyfriend, whatever the word is now. Dean is a sunbaked golden brown, with broad shoulders and naturally streaked blond hair. Definitely a stud muffin.

I also admire his fine mind. But not this time. Now he was flat-out wrong.

“It’s disgusting,” Dean said. “She should have been taken away and shot.”

“She’s not to blame,” I said. “What she did was natural.”

“Eating her own children?” Dean said. “You think that’s natural? On Mother’s Day?”

“Alligators don’t celebrate Mother’s Day.”

The headline that shocked Dean was “Florida Gator Eats Offspring on Mother’s Day.” Some innocent tourists, expecting to see Disney moments on their Everglades tour, photographed the gruesome scene. They were stunned that the alligator would eat her kids in front of their kids.

 “It’s a metaphor for the whole state,” he said.

“I won’t argue with that,” I said.

“Nothing in Florida is normal,” he said.

With that, Dean was shoved out of the way by a muscular woman pushing a baby stroller that held a tiny Chihuahua. I never got used to people hauling dogs around in strollers.

“See?” he said. “Exhibit A just charged by.”

I felt I should defend my native state. “Did you get a close look at that poor dog? It was so old it had a white muzzle. Plus it had a bandage on its paw. The woman was being kind.”

“Not to me,” Dean said, rubbing his elbow where the dog woman had clipped him.

I playfully kissed his muscular arm, and he laughed.

It was a warm January afternoon, and I wore my favorite yellow sundress and had my long, dark hair up in a ponytail. Dean had on shorts and a stylish Hawaiian shirt embroidered on the pocket with a toucan sitting in a cocktail glass.

I much preferred the ocean to the canal. Florida canals ranged from floating trash dumps to sylvan scenes. This one was somewhere in between. Foam cups and chip bags floated along the weedy edge, which was lined with green scum.

Across the canal, I spotted a glamorous older woman in a red picture hat walking a black cat on a red leash. She had perfectly cut white hair and a stylish red pantsuit. She made age seem like an achievement.

I pointed at her. “See, Dean. Not everything in South Florida is crazy. Look at that woman walking her cat.”

The black cat with green eyes trotted along the canal path, then suddenly stopped, ears alert.

“Vanessa!” woman said. “Come along. Don’t dilly-dally.”

“There,” I said. “When’s the last time you heard someone say ‘dilly-dally’?”

With that, an alligator, evil and prehistoric, slid out of the scummy green water on the canal’s edge, and lumbered toward the woman and her cat. The gator’s gaping jaws revealed cruel yellow teeth.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Vanessa,” the woman shrieked, and yanked on the cat’s leash. The dark furball refused to move. It dug in, arched its back and hissed at the armored beast. The gator could swallow Vanessa in one bite.

“That alligator is going to attack,” I said.

“We can’t do anything,” Dean said. “The canal is too wide for us to cross.”

We watched helplessly, unable to stop the carnage.

Then out of nowhere, a man wearing the Day-Glo vest of a park employee and carrying a pointed metal-tipped trash stick ran straight for the gator and speared it in the eye. The gator bellowed and thrashed as the man stuck the gator in the other eye, and then jabbed the beast in its nostrils.

I winced. I had no sympathy for the gator, but the eye-jabbing made me queasy. Did the man blind the creature? I couldn’t tell. The gator backed off but stayed defiantly on the bank, holding its ground and thrashing its tail.

“Why isn’t the gator going back into the canal, where it would be safe, Dean?”

He shrugged. “Like I said, nothing in this state is normal.”

“Look!” I said. “A TV crew is taping the battle. And that’s Carol Berman.”

The petite brown-haired reporter was a south Florida star, and seemingly fearless. She approached the chaotic scene wearing open-toed sandals that I thought were way too close to the gator’s whipping tail and snapping jaws.

Now I heard the howl of police sirens, while the speared gator hissed and thrashed and the white-haired woman struggled to hang onto her squirming cat. Vanessa, determined to go after her attacker, lashed her tail and sent the woman’s hat sailing in to the canal.

Two police officers ran up, guns drawn, and shooed Carol and the woman away from the gator while the rescuer stood guard with his metal-tipped stick.

“Why doesn’t the cop shoot the gator, Dean?” I asked.

“Can’t,” Dean said. “The cop has to call SNAP.”

“The federal food assistance program?”

“Nope, SNAP, the Statewide Nuisance Alligator Program.”

Fifteen minutes later, a gator trapper, dressed in camo, pulled up in a pickup. He jumped out and easily subdued the hissing alligator, quickly wrapping its jaws in silver duct tape. The park employee helped the trapper carry the struggling reptile to the trapper’s pickup.

Meanwhile, Carol, the perky TV reporter, was interviewing bystanders. We could hear her talking to Vanessa’s owner. I knew who she was as soon as I heard her name: Abigail Peachtree, one of the richest women in Florida.

“Vanessa is my child,” Abigail said. “I can’t thank this man enough for saving my baby.”

“Just doing my job, ma’am,” the cat rescuer said. His voice had a soft southern accent. He looked down at his boots and did everything but say, “Aw, shucks.”

Carol stuck a mic in the man’s face and asked, “What’s your name?”

“Gil Shecker,” he said. Gil was about five feet ten and wiry, with a dark shirt, worn jeans and boots that were down at the heels. His rough skin was burned deep red. Gil had hair like a handful of straw. Everything about him said “country.”

“Can you tell us what happened?” Carol asked.

 

 

 

 

 

 

“I was picking up trash over there under those trees.” Gil waved an arm toward a cluster of palm trees. “And I heard the commotion. I saw that gator going for that lovely lady’s cat.”

I swear, Abigail simpered like a southern belle.

“I didn’t have a real weapon, but I had my stick, and it was nice and sharp. So I just rushed on over there and did what I had to do. It wasn’t no big deal.”

Abigail interrupted. “But it was. You saved us, and I’m so grateful.”

***

Did Gil really save Abigail? Or was the daring rescue a set-up? Why was the TV camera conveniently on the spot?

Abigail the heiress rewards Gil handsomely for saving her cat. That reward that leads to betrayal, a broken romance and murder.

 

Beach Blonde Betrayal will be published July 7 as a hardcover, audio book and ebook. Pre-order your copy  of this sun-soaked mystery from your favorite indie bookstore, including Left Bank Books in my hometown of St. Louis  https://tinyurl.com/44tt2pr9. Other outlets include  Amazon https://tinyurl.com/yc7h5vfy, and Thrift Books https://tinyurl.com/99hctxvs

Enjoy!

 

First Page Critique: Managing Mood, Metaphor and Jargon

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By PJ Parrish

We’ve got an interesting First Page submission this morning. One caveat about your critic here: I am pretty inept when it comes to new technology. If they gave out certificates for technophobia, I’d have one framed on my wall. So I will need you nerdo-types out there to help me out with this one — let me know if I’m being too hard or too soft with our dear writer.

Here’s our submission. BRB FLASH. (I trying…I really am).

UNTITLED

Monday hit like bad coffee: bitter, necessary, unavoidable. Steam curled off my mug and threaded through the air. Across the kitchen, Zach leaned against the sink, tie loosened, expression caught between amusement and dread, the face before a meeting that’ll eat your soul.

“Ready to charm another nest of executives?” He crossed the kitchen, moving like he owned half my life already.

“I was born ready to confront middle management about trust exercises and weaponized slide decks.”

His mouth twitched. “Workplace Solutions. Nobody calls us when things are healthy.”

We’d been partners, professional and otherwise, for a year and a half. Corporate threat assessment paid the mortgage. Noticing what people tried to hide came with the job.

Our bungalow smelled of coffee and deadlines. Tug, our small golden retriever, snored at my feet like a broken motor.

For once the week started without a fire to stomp out. No terrified client calling at dawn, no red-flag emails waiting to detonate. Zach brushed his knuckles along the back of my shoulder on his way past, a small touch that carried the weight of every night we’d fallen asleep in our clothes after a crisis debrief. I leaned into it without thinking, grateful for a morning when my pulse didn’t sprint ahead of me. Maybe we’d earned a stretch of easy cases. We might even sleep in the next weekend, no alarms, no threat assessments, blankets tangled around our legs while Tug nosed in for space.

My phone lit up on the table. Carly. Windblown hair, fierce grin, camera strap slashing across her shoulder. The photo punched light straight through my chest before the ring even finished.

“Morning, sweetheart—”

Her voice came raw, splintered. “Mom, turn on the TV. I’m on my way.”

The air went brittle. I grabbed the remote.

The screen flickered, then locked onto a news crawl:

BREAKING: TIERNEY ROURKE, FOUNDER OF PIVOT POINT NETWORK, SHOT OUTSIDE DOWNTOWN HOTEL.

My heart slammed hard enough to skid my vision.

Sirens bled through the speakers. Police tape snapped in the wind. A reporter leaned into the gale, shouting over it.

Zach set his mug down hard. Coffee sloshed.

The feed rolled clips: Tierney onstage at Northwestern, then on a Milwaukee dais. A tall woman moving with a commanding glide that silenced a room. Then laughing softly on a late-night couch, calm eyes, measured voice, coppery hair caught the light…

_______________

BAK! I’ve made my return. Now, again, I usually don’t like stories that are heavy on tech-stuff. Computers and everything connected with them are like cars to me — I like them user-friendly, devoid of bells and whistles and I just want them to get me where I need to go. BUT…

That shouldn’t be a deterent to me liking a tech-oriented book. I am reading Andy Weir’s The Martian right and man, this thing reads like a NASA launch manual. Does that negate my enjoyment? No, because first, Weir makes me care about the hero and his perilous circumstance. And second — and this is key to my critique here today — Weir is very good at explaining the technical stuff, translating scientific gobbledigook into terms I can grasp.

This is a craft sleight of hand for any writer who is dealing with any kind of arcane subject matter. It’s like handling foreign languages in your book. Yes, you can use French dialogue but you have to find a way to make the reader understand it in context. Example:

“Tu vas me manquer,” she said.

“I’ll miss you, too,” he said.

Thus, if you are writing a story dealing with any kind of modern technology, with jargon, situations, and procedures, you have to be really careful how you handle it. So how did our writer today do?

This is a good submission overall. And the writer does three things well: Gets the dramatic ball rolling quickly with a break in the norm — the phone call about a dead woman who has some connection to the narrator, who I assumed is the main character. Second, the writer doesn’t overwhelm readers too early with information about the character’s tech job. Thrid: In just 400 words or so, the writer gets in a lot of basic plot information:

  • The (unammed) narrator is working hard lately on some kind of project to please the corporate suits.
  • She is in a relationship with Zach but it is implied things aren’t all lovey-dovey.
  • She has a daughter she loves who is a photographer.
  • Someone important whom she knows well just got whacked outside a hotel.

Not a bad start. No throat-clearing or background info-dumps. So I think the writer is on the right track. But, as with all of us, there are some things that could be better. Let’s start with the opening paragraph — the coffee metaphor.

You guys know how much a love metaphors. But they are the nail gun of the craft toolbox. They must be handled with the greatest care or you get bump-firing (too many metaphors), uncontrolled recoil (cliches and mixed metaphors) or maybe a barbed rivet in your ring finger (the dreaded tortured metaphor).

I don’t mind that the writer used bad coffee as a metaphor for her mood. We can all relate to that. But the metaphor here goes awry because it is impersonal and confusing.

Monday hit like bad coffee: bitter, necessary, unavoidable. Steam curled off my mug and threaded through the air. Across the kitchen, Zach leaned against the sink, tie loosened, expression caught between amusement and dread, the face before a meeting that’ll eat your soul.

The coffee metaphor needs to relate directly to the character. And can coffee be “unavoidable?” Then we get steam curling and threading, which is soothing, a contradiction of the first line. Also confusing mood: The first paragraph compares this Monday to bitter coffee. Yet later, the heroine thinks that for once, it has been a nice quiet Monday.

Then we get Zach coming out of nowhere with an expression that is amused and yet dread-filled. Again, confusion. Plus, in this CRITICAL OPENING PARAGRAPH — who gets named first and thus steals the spotlight? Not our heroine.

I took a whack at writing a coffee metaphor opening that roughly follows what I think is happening in this scene:

The coffee looked like I felt. Bitter and dark.

And what were all those black flecks? I flipped open the Mr. Coffee lid. Zach had used a paper towel as a filter and the pot was filled with grounds. What a way to start this Monday morning.

I dumped the paper towel of grounds in the sink, put in a real filter and grounds and  stabbed the the brew button. Coffee in my morning — especially this morning — was not a luxury. It was a neccessity. Work at had been overwhelming lately, my days as a cyber threat assessor filled with talking clients off cliffs and ironing the suits in the boardroom. Zach and I had started Work Solutions five years to protect some of biggest companies in the world from data breaches, ransomware, and hacking. Today, I couldn’t even get a damn cup of coffee going.

Zach came into the kitchen, and I could see from his slack face he hadn’t slept.

Now this might not even represent the mood the writer wants to convey for both the heroine and her relationship with Zach. I only show this to demonstrate that the coffee metaphor HAS TO MEAN SOMETHING. Michael Connelly, quoting Joseph Wambaugh, calls this THE TELLING DETAIL. One image, one small thing, can tell volumes about your character. And second, I delayed Zach’s entrance so we could start empathizing with the heroine first.

Small but important aside, dear writer: You must find a way to tell us her name in these first pages. This is a common problem in first person POV. Maybe you do it with dialogue from Zach wherein he addresses her by name?  Maybe her job requires a name badge? Or she can have a thought about it?

The box of business cards was still on the counter where Zach had left them last night, beside our empty champagne glasses. I pulled a card out and stared at the embossed text:

WORK SOLUTIONS

Zach Phillips

Kendra Bradley

The champagne had been to celebrate our first anniversary going into business together. The business cards? That had been my idea. It still bothered me that my name was second.

Again, this is just an example. But note that this sort of “telling detail” of the order of names also illuminates character and her relationship.

One more thing before I shut up. As I said, I am tech-challenged and it took me too long to try to figure out what this woman does for a living. I figured “corporate threat assessment” probably had someting to do with cyber-security. But when I looked it up, I found out it’s an incredibly varied profession. Schools have threat assessments to create active shooter drills. Police departments have threat assessment people to deal with hostages and even domestic abuse. Personnel departments have threat assessment teams to look for potential workplace violence.

So, dear writer…take a moment to go into her thoughts and tell the reader, a little more explicitly, what exactly she does in her work. Nothing long or drawn out, no info-dump. Just a line or two that clues us in.

There’s a new good book called Dead Money by Jakob Kerr. It is about a woman who is an “unofficial solver” for Silicon Valley’s most ruthless venture capitalists. She’s an expert at wrangling rich tech bros but the hotttest CEO has just been murdered, leaving behind billions in “dead money” — frozen in his will. The investigation is going nowhere so the heroine has to step up and find the killer from a suspect list that reads like a who’s-who of Valley players.

I started reading it this week and it reminds me a little of this submission. The murder is handled in a prologue and the heroine is introduced in Chapter 1 with this line:

In MacKenzie Clyde’s experience, there were exactly two ways of dealing with a rich asshole.

Dead Money won the Edgar last week for best first novel.

Addendum: For the writer, I am tacking on a quick line edit (my comments in red). Not alot of line editing is needed. But my takeaway, dear writer, is that you’re on the right track. Lots of good stuff there. So keep going!  And thanks for letting us read your work.

Monday hit like bad coffee: bitter, necessary, unavoidable. Steam curled off my mug and threaded through the air. Across the kitchen, Zach leaned against the sink, tie loosened, expression caught between amusement and dread, the face before a meeting that’ll eat your soul. Bring Zach in later after we’ve connected with your heroine. Never let a named character hog the spotlight. And you have to pin down the MOOD of this scene better — Zach is imparting both casualness, affection AND dread. (of what?) 

“Ready to charm another nest of executives?” He crossed the kitchen, moving like he owned half my life already.

“I was born ready to confront middle management about trust exercises and weaponized slide decks.”

His mouth twitched. “Workplace Solutions. Nobody calls us when things are healthy.” This is your first use of dialogue. Dialogue is precious. Don’t use it for idle morning chitchat, especially this early in your story. And I don’t understand this line: moving like her owned half my life already.  Is she pissed off? Resentful? Again, the mood feels oddly unfocused.

We’d been partners, professional and otherwise, for a year and a half. Corporate threat assessment paid the mortgage. Noticing what people tried to hide came with the job. Use her thoughts to be more specific about what exactly she does for a living. TEACH your readers about what threat assessment is. But keep it short. You can SHOW us in later chapters what it means thru her actions.

Our bungalow smelled of coffee and deadlines. Tug, our small golden retriever, snored at my feet like a broken motor.

For once the week started without a fire to stomp out. So it’s so far so good Monday? No terrified client calling at dawn, no red-flag emails waiting to detonate. Zach brushed his knuckles along the back of my shoulder on his way past, a small touch that carried the weight of every night we’d fallen asleep in our clothes after a crisis debrief. I leaned into it without thinking, grateful for a morning when my pulse didn’t sprint ahead of me. Maybe we’d earned a stretch of easy cases. We might even sleep in the next weekend, no alarms, no threat assessments, blankets tangled around our legs while Tug nosed in for space. Not a bad personal graph here. So things are GOOD between them? Then why earlier did you give her that strange thought that he moved like he owned half her life already? Again, inconsistent mood.

My phone lit up on the table. Carly. Windblown hair, fierce grin, camera strap slashing across her shoulder. The photo punched light straight through my chest before the ring even finished.

Good job upcoming on jacking up the pace of your writing — short punnchy — to match the action!

“Morning, sweetheart—”

Her voice came raw, splintered. “Mom, turn on the TV. I’m on my way.”

The air went brittle. I grabbed the remote. The screen flickered, then locked onto a news crawl:

BREAKING: TIERNEY ROURKE, FOUNDER OF PIVOT POINT NETWORK, SHOT OUTSIDE DOWNTOWN HOTEL.how about HILTON MILWAUKEE CITY CENTER. Or wherever this takes place. That way you’ve gracefully slipped in where this book takes place. 

My heart slammed hard enough to skid my vision. Not sure what “skidded vision” looks like.

Sirens bled through the speakers. Thru the TV? Police tape snapped in the wind. A reporter leaned into the gale, shouting over it.

Zach set his mug down hard. Coffee sloshed. Keep the focus on the TV for now. He can come up to TV later.

The feed rolled clips: Tierney onstage at Northwestern, then on a Milwaukee dais. A tall woman moving with a commanding glide that silenced a room. Then laughing softly on a late-night couch, calm eyes, measured voice, coppery hair caught the light. Nice…good way to tell us the narrator knows this victim, not just professionally but personally. Ups the ante. Well done.

 

New Research Tool for Writers

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Pat’s excellent post last week got me thinking about a new-to-me research tool to help writers “write what you know.” Though I agree with Pat’s advice to contact a consultant, this tool can help when you’re unable to find one and/or help you understand what they tell you.

First, a quick story about how I discovered this tool.

I found myself in a quandary of needing to learn Associated Press (AP) Stylebook, like, yesterday. Google didn’t help. Neither did Siri. The differences between AP Stylebook and Chicago Manual of Style (CMOS) cannot be discovered by a quick search. I needed to dig into AP Stylebook and discover the differences for myself. But how? Buy the style guide and read it with my highlighter? Maybe later, not now. As I mentioned, I needed this knowledge as soon as possible.

For those unfamiliar with AP Stylebook…

The Associated Press (AP) Stylebook was created specifically for journalists to ensure consistency, accuracy, and clarity in news writing. First published in 1953, it originated from earlier internal guides designed to help Associated Press correspondents standardize spelling, punctuation, and usage across media outlets. It is considered the Bible for reporters, editors, and photographers, focusing on concise and clean writing.

While designed for news reporting, AP Stylebook has evolved into the leading industry standard for public relations, marketing, and corporate communication. Most organizations and company blogs also use AP Stylebook now.

For me, if I didn’t learn it, I could kiss goodbye a high-paying, permanent writing position that aligns with my passion to help animals and allows me plenty of free time to write fiction. To “fake it till I make it” was not an option. Too much at stake.

At this time, a dear friend was cramming for a test to obtain another job-related license. When I saw him studying on his phone, I said, “Do you have the three-ring binder in ebook form?”

He said no. “It’s Quizlet.”

“Quiz what?”

“Quizlet. It’s a learning app.”

“For just your field?”

“No. For any field.”

The proverbial lightbulb blazed on.

I brought up Quizlet.com on my phone. Sure enough, they offered several courses in AP Stylebook. They also offer courses in CMOS, if any of you need to brush up on grammar, comma usage, abbreviations, punctuation, or how to handle things like professional titles, expertise, or rank. Even with an editor, the writer should know our industry standards.

Quizlet

Created by Andrew Sutherland in 2005 (released in 2007) to help him study for a French vocabulary test, Quizlet has grown into a widespread education company.

Quizlet is a leading global learning platform and app that offers AI-powered study tools, digital flashcards, and interactive games to help students practice and master various subjects.

See where I’m going with this as a research tool?

Used by millions, Quizlet enables users to create custom sets or utilize millions of existing, user-generated materials, including study guides, practice tests, and spaced repetition.

When you go to the site, type in whatever it is you want to learn. Scroll down the list. Often, there are several types of courses in that field. Click on the course that covers what you need.

In my case, I didn’t need hardcore reporting rules in AP Stylebook. Because I’ve had CMOS drilled into me, I really only needed to discover how AP handled punctuation, titles, and comma usage. I studied a lot more than that to be safe — no one will catch me under-prepared — but a lot is similar.

Does your main character have a unique skillset or profession? Take a Quizlet course so you can write with some authority.

Need to add fingerprint analysis to your scene? If you can’t attend Writers Police Academy or find a consultant, both of which I highly recommend, take a Quizlet course.

Or maybe, you’ve always wanted to learn a different language for an upcoming vacation.

Quizlet works because it’s global. The site is packed with information on just about every topic. What I love most is the positivity. If you answer a question incorrectly, up pops a message, “That’s okay. You’re still learning.” Then it’ll give you the same question later. When you answer correctly, the message reads, “Way to go! You got it this time!” And it will continue to give you that question until you answer correctly a few times. After which, you’ll see, “You’re really getting this!” or “You’ve got this now!”

The messages lift you up and make you want to keep studying, but Quizlet will also tell you to take a break, drink water, and stretch, if you’ve studied too long.

Key Features and Study Modes

Flashcards: Digital, interactive cards that support images and audio.

Learn: Adaptive study plans gauge how much you know about the topic. Check “Yes” you know that already or “No” you don’t. And it will build your study plan and flashcards from there.

Test: Once you feel ready, take a test to gauge how well you’re doing.

Study Games: I haven’t used this feature. Evidently, it’s an engaging, fast-paced game like “Match.”

AI Integration: AI tools generate study guides and explanations from user-uploaded notes. On something I continued to answer incorrectly, I asked for an explanation. Wasn’t impressed with it, so I looked it up myself. Quizlet’s explanation was, in fact, correct. It just didn’t give me enough information to connect the dots in my mind.

Quizlet Live: A collaborative, multiplayer classroom game. I’ve never gotten involved (not my cup of tea), but maybe you’d enjoy it.

All in all, I love Quizlet. It’s a fantastic tool for those of us who love to learn.

Reader Friday-And Did You Know?

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Today is a special day. What? you ask.

Military Spouse Appreciation Day, that’s what.

May is traditionally the month that our esteemed military is celebrated. Here is a link you can follow, or just read the excerpt I included below.

https://www.military.com/spouse/military-spouse-appreciation-day

From the website:

“You don’t need a dedicated Military Spouse Appreciation Day to make sure you acknowledge the military spouse in your life. Service members know that their spouses are the ones who keep the home fires burning. And military spouses know that those around them also walking through military life are more than just friends and neighbors: They are family.

What is Military Spouse Appreciation Day?

Military Spouse Appreciation Day is a day set aside for us to pause to recognize the military spouses around us who have the greatest impact on our lives and our military communities.

When is Military Spouse Appreciation Day?

The Friday in May before Mother’s Day, this special day was first recognized by President Ronald Reagan in 1984. The sitting president typically issues a proclamation in recognition of the holiday, while celebrations are held on and near U.S. military bases around the world.

May is also host to a series of other military holidays, including Military Appreciation Month, established in 1999; Victory in Europe (VE) Day, commemorating the end of WWII in Europe on May 8, 1945; and Armed Forces Day, designated in 1949. Memorial Day, the only official federal holiday in May, is celebrated the last Monday of the month.”

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There you have it. We probably all have military folks in our lives, so let’s make sure they know we appreciate their service, either in the field or on the home front.

Comments welcome!

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I’ll be MIA (do you see what I did there?) for a few weeks, rehabbing from surgery. A huge “thank you” to those from the Best Team Ever who are filling in for me. I’ll be lurking and reading, though, never fear!

🙂