Category Archives: Who Am I?

When You’re Happy and You Know It

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By Elaine Viets

 

What made you happy in the last 24 hours? What about the last three months?

OK, I’ll go first.

A surprise gift of orchids from a friend. And the silly antics of my cat Vanessa. Both made me happy in the last 24 hours. They’re pictured below.

In the last three months, the weekly phone calls from my cousin Lisa made me happy.

These questions are important not only for our well-being, but to understand how  writers create our characters. I read about happiness in a recent article in The Pudding, and if you don’t subscribe to this free newsletter, you’re definitely missing out on happiness.

Writer Alvin Chang’s Pudding article “mapped out 100,000 moments collected as part of a research project on what makes people happy. From sensory pleasure and serendipity to leisure and personal growth, he identified the major themes that emerge when we think about our most cherished moments.”

Here are few that may make you smile, especially the first one:

“My boss was away on business which made my workday very enjoyable and left me with a smile on my face all day.” Female, 36, married, parent

“I went to see my Grandma at the nursing home.” Male, 26, single

“My husband was ignoring me and I laid in bed thinking of funny words with the word ‘sass’ in them to describe him (like Sasquatch) – it amused me greatly.” Female, 26, parent

“I got to leave work early on Friday.” Female, 53, single, parent

“I took a day off to enjoy a nice day.” Male, 38, mot a parent

“Enjoyed a Hardboys Peach Country hard cider.” Male, 32, single, not a parent

“I made progress on some household projects.” Female, 22, married, not a parent

“I was able to stay home and work, while my brother-in-law picked up the kids from school by switching his schedule.” Female, 37, married, parent

Scientists used to believe that happiness was U-shaped. “We are happy when we’re young, less happy when we’re middle-aged and then happy again when we’re old.”

Chang mentioned a research article by Arthur Stone that surveyed people between 18 and 85. It said, “Stress and anger steeply declined from the early 20s, worry was elevated through middle age and then declined, and sadness was essentially flat.”

But hold on . . . that U-shape may no longer be true. Another story says, “Pooling Global Minds data across 44 countries, including the United States and the United Kingdom, over the period 2020–2025 we confirm that ill-being is no longer hump-shaped in age but now decreases in age.”

So the middle-age slump is out. The twenties are a rough time. The reason for this is sad: “the deterioration in young people’s mental health both absolutely and relative to older people.”

Once you get through your difficult 20s, your chances of happiness increase.

When Harvard researchers followed people for their entire lives, Alvin Chang wrote, “they found that good relationships were the most important thing for happy, healthy lives.” We need a “meaningful life with a sense of purpose.”

That makes sense. Except social media and smart phones have made us addicted to screens from a young age. “It’s taken a toll on how much time we spend with each other.”

Alvin Chang included a “happy map” with his article. Check it out here. https://pudding.cool/2026/02/happy-map/ he  says it’s “a mirror of the broken world we’ve built, as seen through our most cherished moments.”

What makes your characters happy?

Now in paperback: Sex and Death on the Beach, my new Florida beach mystery, is now in paperback. If you read it and like it, you’ll make me happy. https://tinyurl.com/3ut3chuu

 

 

O Writer, Who Art Thou?

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“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” —Oscar Wilde

* * *

Who are you?

The image above is the Road ID bracelet I wear when I go outside for a run. It’s one of those “just in case” things. The little statement at the bottom of the ID says a lot about me, and not just about running. I like to think that I always finish what I start.

Of course, human beings are complicated organisms, and we can’t summarize someone by just a few words. (That would make them flat characters. 😊)

On the other hand, it is fun to find short phrases that shine a light on who we are and what our attitude toward life is, so I went looking for descriptions that might fit some of the people I know. Here are a few I found interesting:

  1. Make a difference
  2. Make somebody’s day
  3. Living the dream
  4. Grateful beyond words
  5. Child of God
  6. Party animal
  7. Dark Horse
  8. Happy Camper
  9. Hard work makes good luck
  10. Challenges make life interesting
  11. Be consistent
  12. Believe in your dreams
  13. Go the extra mile
  14. Give 100%
  15. If it wasn’t hard, why do it

* * *

Who are you as a writer?

What about our approach to writing? I know people who select a single word to focus on throughout a new year. That never appealed to me until a couple of years ago when I decided to give it a try. Now that we’re at the beginning of 2025 with all our writing goals for the year in place, maybe it’s time to select a word or phrase to post above the desk to help us stay focused all year long.

This year I decided to go for a full phrase. It’s one of my favorite pieces of advice: Festina Lente, Latin for Make haste slowly. Although it seems incongruous, the phrase makes perfect sense. Work as hard as you can, but don’t rush through the job. (I wrote a TKZ blog post about Festina Lente a few years ago that explains where the phrase originated and its relationship to writing.)

But I wanted to add a little extra something to my favorite phrase to make it perfect this year, so I used Google translate to find the Latin equivalents of my additions. I printed it out in Algerian font and hung it above my desk.

Festina Lente
Cum
Alacritate,
Gratia, et
Voluntate

Looks impressive, eh? It means Make haste slowly with enthusiasm, gratitude, and determination. If I feel myself moving toward that “things aren’t going the way I want them to” sinkhole, I look at my little sign and remember what I’m supposed to be concentrating on.

* * *

Defining ourselves in just a few words may seem like an academic exercise, but it can also focus our work and attitude on the things that we feel are most important.

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” —Ralph Waldo Emerson

* * *

So TKZers: What word or phrase would you use to define yourself? Your writing? Do you have a word or phrase to concentrate on during 2025?

 

 

“a spectacular tale of a decades-old murder mystery, human drama, and a hint of romance” —Prairie Book Reviews

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