Today, let’s discuss a subject few writers talk about, yet it’s vitally important for creativity. I’m referring to inner peace. Without balance and harmony within us, doing any creative work becomes ten times more difficult. Fear, pressure, and stress cloud the mind. Silence the chaos and restore your center.
But how?
I’ll tell you a little secret. You already have the power within you. All you need to do is tap into it.
I rarely, if ever, expose personal struggles in public, but I’m hoping my story will help demonstrate my point. And maybe, you’re going through a similar period and will find comfort in knowing you’re not alone.
Without delving too deep into my personal life, I stood at a crossroad when I turned the age of my mother when she died, so I began the arduous journey of reflecting on my life. And tough questions emerged — If I died tomorrow, would I feel like I sold myself short? I answered yes. Did I take risks to ensure a happily ever after? No. I chose safety, security, and friendship over fulfillment, desire, and passion. I settled. And those were tough realizations for me.
Taking stock of one’s life isn’t an easy endeavor — it can be downright terrifying — but I do think it’s healthy and necessary from time to time. Personal growth doesn’t have an age limit, nor does happiness. Don’t let fear stop you. It’s NEVER too late to start over.
Anyway, there I stood, staring at the crossroad for a long while, weighing the pros and cons of each path. If I dared to choose the hard road, would I survive? A resounding yes bellowed from the heavens. What might be the repercussions of my decision? Those were a bit harder to accept, but I’ve lived long enough to know I shouldn’t have to forfeit anything to keep the peace. No one should.
And so, I headed down the hard road. My heart and soul wouldn’t allow me to choose otherwise.
Though I knew I made the right decision, uncertainty lingered about what the future might hold. I was alone for the first time in almost three decades. I knew where I wanted to end up, which was half the battle, but I wasn’t sure how to get there.
While I winded down the road rife with challenges, complications, and obstacles, I kept telling myself life would iron out the wrinkles on its own, that time was the great equalizer.
Turns out, I gave myself solid advice. One year later, I’m now in the final stages of buying my own home, complete with a barn, plenty of land for privacy, and a ready-made spot for an above-ground pool (I’ve always wanted a pool). Sunlight cascades through French doors, sliders, and oversized windows. The town exudes the feel of deep country, yet it’s close enough to civilization so grocery shopping doesn’t eat up an entire day. It’s perfect! Closing is in two weeks… just in time for the holidays. 😀
This past year wasn’t easy. Far from it. Moving twice in one year also sucks. This too shall pass. I’ll soon be in my forever home.
My point is, stress isn’t healthy for anyone. For writers, mental fatigue can stifle creativity. And sure enough, my ability to create took a massive hit. I could edit and rewrite without issue, but my well of new ideas almost ran dry.
As someone who rarely took more than one or two days off in a row, not creating affected my mood, which led to not wanting to market my books or socialize online. Hence my spotty appearance on social media and in the comment section of blogs.
Even now, I’m often the last person to comment… sometimes days later. I’ve learned to be kind to myself. The real world offers me so much happiness and wonder, the virtual world has taken a backseat. Once I complete my move, I’ll get back to my regular routine. It’s a must.
As a double Libra (sun and moon), I crave balance and harmony. It’s at the core of who I am as a person.
While I was still trying to adjust to my new life, one day I stopped — blocked out everything and everyone — and sat in silence, with nothing but the sweet song of serenity from the Natural World. After several deep breaths, I tapped into the power of healing energy within me.
I remembered who I am — a freakin’ warrior, with an unquenchable zest for life, who has survived and thrived and would never settle for mediocre — and a weight lifted. I could breathe again without feeling like I was suffocating. Or drowning in a sea of “good enough.”
It’s amazing what the simple act of intentional breathing can do for inner peace. We’ve talked about it before. The “Relaxation Response” (RR) is a physiological and psychological state opposite to the fight-or-flight response. RR therapy includes meditation, yoga, and repetitive prayer, and has been practiced for thousands of years. These stress-reducing practices counteract the adverse clinical effect of stress in disorders like hypertension, anxiety, insomnia, and aging.
Research on the underlying molecular mechanisms of why it works remained undetermined until a 2017 study unearthed a fascinating discovery. Both short-term and long-term practitioners of meditation, yoga, and repetitive prayer showed “enhanced expression of genes associated with energy metabolism, mitochondrial function…” and more efficient insulin secretion, which helps with blood sugar management. Relaxation Response also reduces the expression of genes linked to inflammatory responses and stress-related pathways. In simpler terms, controlled breathing helps boost the immune system and improves energy metabolism.
Good brain health and inner peace increases creativity. Creativity fuels inspiration. Inspiration ups the word count.
I want to share an amazing deep breathing exercise to unlock the power within you. The best part? It really works!
Set the first two fingers of your right hand between your eyebrows. With your thumb, block your right nostril. Inhale through your left nostril. Pause. Release your thumb and block your left nostril with your ring finger. And exhale. Pause at the end. Inhale through your left nostril. Pause. Exhale out your right nostril. Repeat this cycle of alternating nostrils several more times (your call on how many).
When you exhale out your right nostril for the last time, lower your hand. Inhale a deep cleansing breath through both nostrils. Pause. Exhale out the mouth. This resets your normal breathing pattern.
If you’d prefer to learn this technique through guided meditation, find the video here.
With your eyes still closed, focus on your environment. Let sounds come to you. Don’t strain to chase them. If outside thoughts spring to mind, visualize setting them on a cloud and let them drift away. Stay in the moment. This exercise helps you regain focus.
What do you hear? Communication surrounds you. The Natural World is rarely silent, even in the city. Is the wind whispering? Trees vibrating? Birds singing? Chipmunks chattering? Is the friendly neighborhood crow calling to you? Or is he speaking to a family member? Stay in the moment and relax awhile.
A friend wrote an excellent series about self-care. The gist is to put yourself first for a change. The WIP, household chores, or that deadline can wait a few minutes. Inner peace is important. And you’ll be even more productive if you take good care of yourself, physically and mentally.
If you tried the deep breathing exercise, you might’ve noticed you had to concentrate on alternating your nostrils to maintain the rhythm. Afterward, when you focused on your environment and let intrusive thoughts float away on clouds, you triggered the brain again while maintaining a nice ’n easy breathing pattern.
Anytime we focus the brain while staying cognizant of the natural rhythms of our organs, we unleash the healing energy within us, from which a fountain of creativity flows. If you struggle to find the elusive “zone” while writing, or you have limited time to write, do this exercise before you begin. You’ll reach flow state easier and quicker.
Do you meditate? Engage in deep breathing exercises? What other techniques do you use to declutter the mind?
What a relief to hear you’ve overcome some challenges and emerged a victor. A few months ago I hit a wall in my writing. A friend challenged me to ‘underachieve.’ To be. To sit. To take a walk without ‘getting caught up on all the podcasts I’d missed.’
What a relief to give myself permission to not write.
Now that I’ve underachieved for two months, I’m ready to jump back in. I also spend a few moments doing deep breathing – it helps! And prayer, too. It helps me focus on what’s important.
Best of luck and blessings to you. Thanks for sharing.
Giving yourself permission not to write is a difficult task. Took me months to let go of the guilt. I had to learn that “some” writing was better than none, even if it’s only a paragraph.
Love the advice to underachieve! So glad it worked for you. I may adopt the same while moving and settling in. Thank you, Jane!
Great subject, Sue. Deep breathing and mindfulness are highly effecting for “decluttering” the brain, which also lets the Boys in the Basement play around for later reference.
I try to take a complete writing break every Sunday. It refreshes me for the week to come. But, ironically, I have to “fight” myself. My brain wants to write something, work on my project, “just a little.” I keep turning off that prompt and do some deep breathing, then do something else, like read a book.
On writing days, some sessions of deep breathing between writing stints helps with focus. (This also works after reading the latest news!)
Oh, boy, the news… Definitely need deep breathing for that. 😂 I try to skip the weekends. If the words refuse to obey, I’ll only write in Notes on my phone, but never on Sundays. I adopted the “no writing on Sundays” rule a few years ago after you mentioned it in a post. Excellent advice. Thanks, Jim!
The Hubster hits a major birthday milestone this week, which means I’m 15 months away from hitting it, too. Does open the eyes. How much longer do I want to keep up this gig? I’m in the last stages of prep to release my next book, but I made the decision not to rush it, so it’s not hitting the ‘shelves’ until mid January.
I renewed my website for two years, not my usual three.
I’m not diving into another project right now. I’m taking the time off, although the urge to write is growing. Instead of juggling two projects, I’m waiting.
Travel has become a draw. There’s so much to see and experience out there. Sometimes, it results in a book. Sometimes, it’s just a vacation.
Congratulations on your decision. Looks like it was a good one.
Thanks, Terry! I hear ya. At pivotal stages in life, priorities change. Most writers will never lose their love of writing but there’s no shame in slowing down or retiring.
Travel calls to me, as well. I’ve owned a parcel of land in New Mexico my whole life (parents bought it when I was born), yet I’ve never seen it in person. One day soon, I plan to go there. Might make a nice winter property to escape the deep freeze in New England.
You’ll be “close” to me when you go to NM. Give a shout!
I will! Always wanted to visit Colorado, too.
Sue, what a timely post! I’m struggling between seeking another contract or taking a break. Recently I’ve discovered there’s more to life than sitting in front of a computer. Don’t get me wrong, I love writing but for the first time in a long time I have the freedom to travel. And I love going places and seeing new things.
“Recently I’ve discovered there’s more to life than sitting in front of a computer.”
No truer words, Pat. The older I get, the more I appreciate simple pleasures, a life filled with wondrous joy and excitement. I spend a lot more time away from phone, tablet, and computer screens these days, and I’ve never been happier and more fulfilled.
Sue, I’m so glad to hear about the transformation you undertook and how it’s brought you to a better place. Thank you, too, my friend for the wisdom about the power of breath and alternate nostril breathing. I’ve practiced that in yoga classes and it truly can bring you to a better place, as can box breathing, and deep, ujjayi breathing. These days I do yoga classes via YouTube, and Yoga Adrienne, Yoga Kassandra and Pagoda Yoga all touch on these techniques, including alternate yoga breathing.
This year has been a transition for me as well. I’ve worked on letting go of my micromanaging of my own creative process and writing more intuitively. Putting away my latest book for the time being and not having any writing deadlines for the first time in a while, has freed me to focus on that creative process.
Now I’m giving myself the opportunity to “test drive” a few ideas for my next novel by writing short stories.
Thanks again, Sue. May your week be filled with creative opportunities.
Thank you, Dale! Pleased to hear you underwent a growth transformation. And thank you for the yoga instructor names. I’ve been dying to get back into it and will finally have plenty of room in the new house.
That Beaver Moon was spectacular last week. Hope you had a chance to check it out via telescope!
Sue, looks like this post is “unanimously timely”! Don’t you love it when that happens?
Giving myself permission to return to my roots shouldn’t be a battle, ya know? I still live in the town I grew up in, and it seems lately everywhere I go there’s a memory. Some of those memories I wish would go away, but others, I just want to sit with for awhile. They remind me of who I was, and still am–but I see the changes, too.
Thanks for sharing. I appreciate it. 🙂
Love that you’re taking the time to revel in memories, Deb! I’m heading to my home town in a few weeks. Looking forward to it!
It’s good to hear you’ve found peace after a rough period, Sue. I do like your deep breathing exercise.
Like you and Jim, I take a 24-hour break once a week—Friday sundown to Saturday sundown. During that time, my laptops are shut down so I’m not tempted to check email or get on SM or respond to blog posts. I don’t check the news or even mention politics. It’s a day to rest and spend time with my husband and our friends.
My go-to method for decluttering the mind is running, but this year’s move and all its chaos has put a dent in that treasured activity. Maybe it’s time to put aside some of the routine and head out to the trails.
Best wishes in your new home!
Yes, Kay. Enjoy those trails! Only today is promised, not tomorrow.
Meant to add: Ugh. The chaos of moving does put a kink in the routine. Hope you’re loving your new home!
New home is wonderful. My cup runneth over.
{{{[hugs]}}}
One never knows what another person is going through, but your journey forward sounds like what you needed. I hope you find the peace and fulfillment you’re moving toward.
Thank you, Becky. My decision wasn’t an easy one, for sure, but it’s the best move I ever made. I can’t wait to experience my next chapter. Peace & love. ♥️
EVERYTHING is harder when you’re chronically ill, and have been for over three decades – even things that are stress-relievers for most people cost so much in time and energy that they are often truncated or impossible.
This year I’ve had to give up even more – because my tiny stress-relievers were CAUSING more stress as I’m trying to finish the third volume in my Pride’s Children mainstream trilogy.
Gratitude helps daily: I still can do some of these, even if not for as long. LIMBO is finally past a knot I hadn’t expected and found a wonderful opportunity – but it took over a year to research, and has to be seamlessly incorporated. I’m not well, but most of my loved ones are, and – we have our first grandchild! (at 76 and 78 we did NOT expect to have any – and her parents are good at updating the pictures and movies on the digital frame, as I don’t know when it will be possible to go see her in Colorado).
The only thing that keeps me going is that I’m as stubborn as the proverbial mule, and I am NOT going to quit.
[And the book is definitely improved.]
Good for you, Alicia! Never give up. {{{hugs}}}