When you’re developing a character, how much thought do you put into their status? If you’re like me, probably not a lot of concentrated effort. I have a good handle on their personality, looks, motives, dreams, fears, desires, insecurities, strengths, quirks, and smarts or stupids, but I don’t flesh out their status—at least not consciously. I tend to let that evolve or stand on its own.
I follow Sahil Bloom, a thought leader and motivator, who has significantly grown his audience in the past year. Sahil hosts a site called The Curiosity Chronicle and has a twice-weekly newsletter with some great content. On Tuesday, his subject was How to Play the Right Status Games citing the difference between “bought status” and “earned status”.
The status subject hit home to me about a recent decision. It was time to buy a replacement vehicle for our old Suzuki hatchback. I hinted to my wife, Rita, that we should splurge and finance a new Range Rover. That didn’t go over well.
“That is nothing but a status symbol. It’s like those leased Beamer SUVs Karens drive,” Rita said. “They’re for people who want to be seen. What? Do you want to start hanging around Starbucks, too?”
Rita made a point. We cash-purchased a low mileage, Kia four-door sedan and grabbed a McDonalds coffee for the ride home.
I flashed back to that Rover moment when I read Sahil’s column and felt it was worth a share on the Kill Zone. So, I sent him an email to which he quickly responded. With full attribution to Sahil Bloom and his kind republishing permission, here’s the piece.
How to Play the Right Status Games by Sahil Bloom
There are two types of status: Bought Status is the improved social positioning garnered through acquired status symbols: · The expensive car, watch, handbag, or jewelry acquired for the sole purpose of showing others your financial wealth · The club membership that makes you a part of the scene · The private plane flight or boat trip taken more for the Instagram photo than for the utility Bought Status is fleeting. It may improve your relative position, but only until the next level is unlocked and you’re right back at the bottom. It will keep you trying to enter what author C.S. Lewis famously referred to as the inner ring: “As long as you are governed by that desire you will never get what you want. You are trying to peel an onion; if you succeed there will be nothing left.” Earned Status, however, is the real respect, admiration, and trust received through hard-won treasures: · The freedom to choose how to spend your time (and whom to spend it with) · The healthy, loving relationships made possible by years of present energy · The purpose-imbued work and mastery within a domain, built through years of effort · The wisdom accumulated through decades of lived experience · The adaptable mind shaped through a steady mindfulness practice and thoughtful introspection · The strong, fit physique built through hours of movement and disciplined eating · The professional promotion or company sale achieved after an extended period of hard work in the dark Earned Status is lasting. It will elicit the durable respect, admiration, and trust that you seek from the people who matter to you, those whose opinions you value and cherish. Earned Status is what we should all be after. The Status Game Tests Here are two simple tests you can use to assess the games you are playing: The Bought-Status Test Would I buy this thing if I could not show it to anyone or tell anyone about it? If the answer to this question is NO, you’re playing a Bought Status Game. Asking this question cuts through the noise to determine if the item itself provides happiness or utility, or if its sole purpose is to signal your success or achievement to others. The Earned-Status Test Could the richest person in the world acquire the thing I want by tomorrow? If the answer to this question is NO, you’re playing an Earned Status Game. The world’s richest people cannot build a loving relationship any faster than you. They cannot forge a healthy mind and body any faster than you. None of them can buy their way to expertise, wisdom, or purpose. Playing the Right Games Status games are a part of life. They are critical for establishing your position in the relative hierarchies that govern your personal and professional worlds. You will never escape them—you simply need to play the right ones. Remember: In your work, relationships, and life, focus on what must be earned, not what can be bought. * * * |
Thanks to Sahil Bloom at The Curiosity Chronicle whose new book The Five Types of Wealth is about to be released.
Kill Zoners — How much attention do you pay to developing your characters’ status?
How much attention to you pay to developing your characters’ status?
None at all, unless it’s to make sure they have little. It’s their lack of it that drives my stories. Horus Blassingame, in A True Map of the City, is a lowly clerk, seeking a way up the corporate ladder. Hirand, in Sorcerer of Deathbird Mountain, is a mere messenger, pining over the unattainable Princess Janubel. But it is love that drives him, not the possibility of advancement. Tenirax is a poet and brick-layer, seeking to seduce wealthy women with his words. His unsigned, insulting poem, slipped under the Bishop’s door in the drunk of night, kicks the story off, and threatens to get Tenirax stretched by Bungorolo, Zaragoza’s official torturer.
Those are quite the names, JGA 🙂 Enjoy your day and thanks for stopping by.
“…an extended period of hard work in the dark.” Sounds an awful lot like writing.
Thanks, Garry and Sahil.
Status is often a driving force for the bad guys/girls in my thrillers. They have the illusion they are above other people and therefore deserve more, whether it’s wealth, power, control, position, etc. I make sure their balloon is punctured by the end.
A long ago experiment found when scientists put too many fish in a tank, the fish all wanted to be on the top level. They fought for the highest position and would even go without food and sex to attain/maintain that position.
Hi Debbie! For some reason WordPress wouldn’t let me reply to your comment – hope this goes through this time. I’ve never understod ths obsession for power and control but used to watch the jockeying when I was in the police force – sort of like your fish in a barrel example.
Interesting post, Garry — and I think a secondary character in my current WIP is definitely of the Bought Status type. Like Debbie, I pull the rug out from under them in the end.
Glad you found it interesting, Terry. I had never really thought of status in the bought and earned categories before reading Sahil’s article, but I have seen so much of both examples over the years when I stop and think about it.
“As long as you are governed by that desire you will never get what you want. You are trying to peel an onion; if you succeed there will be nothing left.” I had not read that quote by C.S. Lewis before. It’s a classic.
A couple of my villains are in the “bought” status category. I had great fun writing about university professors in Time After Tyme. (My husband is a retired uni professor.) Although you can’t buy tenure or a chairmanship or dean position, they are status symbols, and the competition to acquire one of those is entertaining. Disclaimer: I never knew anyone in academia who behaved like the characters in my book. 🙂
Good morning, Kay. I haven’t been around the universtiy scene much, but I can just imagine the climbing competition. Speaking of climbing, I’m back into mountaineering and if there ever is a non-competitive sport, it’s climbing. Truly one helping another to the top,
Mountaineering sounds a lot like becoming an author. Helping each other move up the slope.
I grew up around old money and went to school with their children. Old Money doesn’t buy stuff with status names, they buy comfort without thinking about it. They show their wealth by donating millions to charities and building hospital wings while donating their time to charities. Their kids, unless they are idiots or emotionally broken, do the same thing.
I don’t think about status so much as where they are and I like my protagonist to earn their status, even if it is nothing more than having a home and family that loves each other (which is all Callista really want–a home and happy family.
Great post and one that we should review every year or so just to keep our heads on straight. Then again, I’m like you–that $50K car won’t get me anywhere any better than the $25K one and will cost more to repair with all the bells an whistles. And designer clothes–well, they’re nothing more than over priced clothes. I’ll take a pair of Goodwill used jeans over $1k jean by a designer and use the money for something more practical. Although I’ll admit–I did buy a Harley Davidson because it was my dream motorcycle. And for me, it was worth the money since I enjoyed it more than I would have another bike and took 18 months and rode all over the USA on my last bike. Which means that sometimes, you need to get that dream and live it, even if it involves a “status” symbol.