Country music master Toby Keith has left us for the Grand Ole Opry in the sky. Mr. Keith was only sixty-two when he passed last month after a brave battle with cancer. It’s a sad loss not just for America but to the entire entertainment world. A brilliant singer, songwriter, producer, actor, and businessman is gone.
Toby Keith started his career in 1998 with his debut super-hit How Do You Like Me Now? Over the next twenty-six years, he recorded five albums that went gold or better. Outstanding are the songs he wrote: American Soldier, Should’ve Been a Cowboy, Courtesy of the Red, White, and Blue, and I Love This Bar.
Of all the songs Mr. Keith wrote, played, and produced, there’s one I think is superb. Just outstanding. Don’t Let The Old Man In.
Story goes that Toby Keith met Clint Eastwood at an event. (Eastwood, now ninety-three, is currently directing and producing his newest upcoming movie titled Juror No. 2.) Keith asked Eastwood what the secret was for staying so active and healthy at his advanced age. This is what Clint Eastwood said:
Every day when I wake up, I don’t let the old man in. My secret has been the same since 1959—staying busy. I never let the old man into the house. I’ve had to drag him out because he was already comfortably settled, bothering me all the time, leaving no space for anything other than nostalgia.
You have to stay active, alive, happy, strong, and capable. It’s in us, in our intelligence, attitude, and mentality. We are young, regardless of our ID. We must learn to fight to not let the old man in.
That old man awaits us, stationed and tired by the side of the road to discourage us. I don’t let the old, critical, hostile, envious spirit in—the one that scrutinizes our past to tie us up with complaints and distant anxieties, or relived traumas and waves of pain.
You have to turn your back on the old murmurer, full of rage and complaints, lacking courage, denying himself that old age can be creative, determined, and full of light and projection.
Aging can be pleasant and even fun if you know how to use your time if you’re satisfied with what you’ve achieved, and if you still maintain enthusiasm. That’s called not letting the old man into the house.
These words immensely resonated with Toby Keith. They inspired him to write Don’t Let The Old Man In which is dedicated to the legend who is Clint Eastwood. Here are the lyrics:
Don’t let the old man in
I wanna live me some more
Can’t leave it up to him
He’s knocking on my door
I knew all of my life
That someday it would end
Get up and go outside
Don’t let the old man in
Yeah, many moons I have lived
My body’s weathered and worn
Just ask yourself how old would you be
If you didn’t know the day you were born
Try to love on your wife
And stay close to your friends
Toast each sundown with wine
Don’t let the old man in
Hmmm Hmmm Hmmm Hmmm Hmm Hm
Yeah, many moons I have lived
My body’s weathered and worn
Ask yourself how old would you be
If you didn’t know the day you were born
When he rides up on his horse
And you feel that cold bitter wind
Look out your window and smile
Don’t let the old man in
Look out your window and smile
Don’t let the old man in
This story—the lyrics, the music, and the video—resonates with me. I’m sixty-seven, and to some, I’m an old man. But I don’t see myself that way. To me, I’m more productive/busy than I was in my thirties and forties. And my productivity/busyness keeps increasing.
I’m blessed with longevity genes. I lead a healthy lifestyle. I don’t smoke. I’m a social drinker. And I’ve never done drugs in my life. Not even inhaling second hand weed.
I’m active. My wife of forty-one years and I stick-walk with weights and aim for 5K steps per day. (On ambitious ones, we’ll do 10-12K.) I have a proportionate weight-to-height ratio and get proper sleep. My stress level doesn’t exist, I have no worries, and at my last medical checkup the doc said I was operating like a 30-year-old.
And I have a purpose. This is the key to senior survival—way, way beyond worries. A definite purpose with a burning desire to achieve it.
I never gave much thought to why I’m like that. Not until I heard Don’t Let The Old Man In and understood the lyrics. I guess I’m this way because I won’t let the old man in.
Kill Zoners — I know there are contributors and followers who top my place on the seniority chart. How do you deal with the old person at the door? Let’s hear from those junior and senior to my 67th-out-of-100 rank.
Dedicated to my 75-year-old life-long friend and mentor Ed Hill www.edhill.art.com
Words to live by.
I’ll be 76 this year and I’ve just spent more time in the hospital these last four weeks than I have had in my entire life. So you have to get in touch with your mortality and your physical limitations and what you are working on and your understanding of faith. These are real things.
You can always get some learning out of any experience. The folks at Methodist go through a process and one of the things they asked me was “would you like a visit from the chaplain?” This time I said yes, and I had a conversation with a reform rabbi that resolved many of my questions about the relationship between faith, G-d and science. I’m much more grounded now.
I am resolved to take Clint Eastwood’s maxims to heart about not letting the old man in the house. And finish editing my collection of short stories. I’m on light duty for a few weeks so that will allow me a bunch of keyboard time.
Thoughtful comment, Robert. Thank you. Fortunately, I’ve never been ill to the point of being hospitalized but I sense that must be a real soul awakening. Especially the subtext behind asking if you’d like to speak to the chaplain. Enjoy your keyboard time and have many more moons of it.
You’ve got me by a year, my friend…
Similar to yourself, I’ve got longevity genes, and have been pretty non-abusive in my habits (never smoked, drugged, and only rarely had an adult beverage), always had a bp of less-than-120 over less-than-70 (though the day-job has its stresses from time to time and “allows” me to walk a bunch – where I take the stairs whenever possible and always down).
I’ve re-picked up the guitar (to my bride’s occasional heavy sighs) and keep the brain busy when not at work with writing, “mentoring” architecture students, and just observing/paying attention and taking delight in the unexpected or just plain interesting.
…and of course the grand-young’ns keep me on my toes and smiling (but I still don’t know how my kids got to be older than I am… 😋)
And BTW – Toby Keith was just inducted into the Country Music Hall of Fame… and not on the “sympathy” vote, either…
https://www.savingcountrymusic.com/weeks-after-death-toby-keith-named-to-country-music-hall-of-fame/
You’re up and at it early, George. (Not sure of your time zone, though.) “Observing/paying attention and taking delight in the unexpected or just plain interesting.” Bang-on prescription for longevity.
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Thank you for this – great reminder.
You’re so welcome, Laura. I wrote this as much for myself as for anyone else. Happy to hear others enjoy it.
Garry, thanks for this uplifting story. Have you seen The Mule, Clint’s great 2018 film about a 90-something man who becomes a drug smuggler (mute)? That’s where I first heard the song.
Writing is a profession where one improves with age, unlike athletics where you peak at 25-30 then it’s all downhill.
The longer we live, the more stories we’ve heard and the more wisdom we’ve gathered. We have a deeper understanding of people and why they do what they do. Those insights make our characters resonate with readers.
We care less what others think and aren’t afraid to speak truth.
Old age and treachery will beat youth and exuberance every time 😉 Waylon said so: https://www.lyrics.com/lyric/5371515/Waylon+Jennings/Old+Age+and+Treachery
Hi Debbie! No, I haven’t seen or heard of The Mule, but I think Grand Torino was superb.
That’s a very interesting point about athletes peaking so young… and then what… I have a neighbour who spent 18 years in the NHL. He’s about 60 now and hobbles around seemingly in chronic pain. Virtually no one knows who he is or what he achieved. Kinda sad.
But us writers? There’s no end to what we can achieve in this biz if we put our young minds to it and don’t let the old writer in.
Good. This post starts my day off with “Should’ve Been a Cowboy” playing in my head. Nice way to start a Thursday.
Good advice. I always take time to pray when someone I know is retiring. That they have a plan and do not let the old man or woman in.
And I need to remind myself not to let the old woman in. Doubt I’ll ever get to retire but I’ve got a lot of stories to write so I need to stay energetic and keep weaving the writing in around the rest of life.
Good Thursday morning, Brenda. I spent a career in Canada’s national police force and I watched, over the years, how many members retired and were dead within a few years. No doubt in my mind that was because they had no purpose left. Enjoy this Thursday and many more of telling stories.
I have longevity genes and have taken good care of myself at the Beatles “64”. Writing has given me purpose with endless stories and continuous learning. Barring accidents, I plan to head to 103 and I have a goal of 200 books by my death. This is a slow year of production as I’ve been building my forever home then selling my current home with a cross country move, but once I settle I’ll put the pedal to the metal and get going again to work on book 25. Great post and I love that saying – keep the old man out of the house.
Now that is one ambitious target, Alec. Thanks for sharing!
I love this advice! I am 72 years young and I try really hard not to let the old lady in. Great post, Garry!
That’s the attitude, Jan! 72 years young 🙂
I am 61 and have the longevity gene. Grandpa was 89. He was very upset when on his 80th birthday, the hospital where he volunteered made him stop pushing wheelchairs. My mother just turned 90.
I see Clint’s point and I try. The years of abuse are starting to show. To quote Indiana Jones, “It’s not the years, it’s the milage.”
I have largely stopped referring to people as old. They are my age. One of my favorite movies is “Same Time Next Year” with Alan Alda. It is about a couple who meet once a year and cheat on their respective spouses. They meet for 20+ years. At one point they note that they are the age “Old Man Chalmers” the caretaker at the inn where they meet was when they started.
A day older beats the alternative!
“It’s not the years, it’s the milage.” You made me chuckle, Alan. And Alan Alda – what can you say other than a true gentleman. Must be something about the name Alan. BTW, that was my dad’s name, it’s my first name, and it’s my son’s name.
Life is good. My husband and I are busier in retirement than we were when working very time-consuming jobs (which we loved.) I have more to do than I can ever accomplish, and I consider that to be a great blessing. I am so grateful.
That old woman may be outside ringing the doorbell, but I just don’t have time to answer the door. 🙂
What’s the line from the Lion King and The Circle of Life, Kay? “There’s more to do than can ever be done.” A piece of advice – just disconnect the doorbell.
Thank you for this thought-provoking blog about aging. I’m 66 and living with Stage 4 ovarian cancer for eight years and a motor neuron disorder that took my mobility at age 58. In my head I’m still zip lining, hiking, and body surfing. It’s hard to maintain a “young” outlook when your body is in shambles. But I see so many actors, musicians, and writers producing incredible, creative works at 70, 75, and 80 years old, that I know “old” has nothing to do with a creative mind–if anything it gets better. I’m doing some of the best writing of my life right now. I see people much older than I am working, volunteering, traveling, and living their best lives. That’s my plan, to do everything I can for as long as I can–but especially writing stories. Toby Keith was one of my favorite singer/songwriters. Gone far too soon. He will be missed.
Great to hear from you this morning, Kelly. Keep up the good fight and keep creating. I’m hoping my friend Ed Hill will show up sometime today. He’s an amazing example of someone who gets more active with age.
Priceless, Garry! Toby Keith was an American treasure.
Clint Eastwood is near the top of my fave actor/director/producer list. Glad to hear he’s working on another masterpiece.
I will be 70 next month. I’ve been ruminating on that milestone . . . and I’ve decided to kick that rock down the road about 5 or 10 miles.
And, my MO for when the Old Lady knocks at my door? Greet her with my 12-gauge. (So to speak, of course.) 🙂
Have a great Thursday!
Hi Deb – I get the sense that most of us who hang around the Kill Zone are somewhat in the same age basket. I think we all have similar attitudes toward age, too. Enjoy your day!
Such an inspiring post, Garry. That’s my goal–to keep learning, growing, and creating. I just turned 63 last week and feel this is the best time of my life. I’m blessed with opportunities, a wonderful, wide circle of friends and family and their support for my writing. I’ll never run out of things to do or stories to tell.
Here’s to all of us returning to this topic in thirty years.
Life-long learning, Dale. I viewed Charlie Munger as a mentor -the man who was Warren Buffet’s mentor and partner. Of the many wisdom crumbs he dropped was the value of being a life-long learner. Mr. Munger recently passed on at the age of 99 and worked (and learned) right to the end. Impressive. Hope to see you for the next 30 or more years!
Good morning Garry, and to all your followers.
It’s a bit humbling and surprising to me to be considered a “mentor”. But, I take that role seriously in that one has no choice in that matter. Garry’s right though. I stubbornly fight back each day. I’m determined to die healthy. Each day, I do what I can do with what life and circumstance has given me. My wife and I support each other in this effort, and that’s a part of the secret. Support of partner and friends is so important.
I’ve been retired from a career of policing for over 22 years. I was a member of the RCMP for over 34 years. And in looking back, which old folks get to do with some clarity, I realize I was fortunate. And in that realization lies the secret.
The day after I retired, when I got up in the morning and looked in the mirror, I didn’t see an RCMP member. S/Sgt Hill was gone – forever. I saw “me”. I saw a healthy husband, father, friend. I saw a guy who paddles ocean-going canoes twice a week year-round on the Salish Sea. I saw a writer, an artist, a curler, a fly-fisher, a teacher, an auctioneer and a friend who helps and supports others. In short, I am truly far busier as “Mr. Hill” than I ever was as “S/Sgt. Hill”. It was that day, the first day of my retirement, that the pace of life sped up in such a good way. And as the old man knocks on the door every so often, I just look out the window to see who’s there. And, if it is the old man, I refuse to answer.
Thanks for the kind words Garry. If indeed I am some sort of mentor, it seems to me you’re improving on the model. Keep up the good work.
Great comment, Ed. You are definitely the most productive young man I know. And with the best attitude towards life. For Kill Zoners info, Ed and I go back to 1980 when he was my boss and I was a greenhorn. Speaking of green, I still owe Ed for a humiliating practical joke he once pulled on me.
Nice column addressing a topic we all face whether we like it or not. When I turned 50, I was clubbing (as in nightclubs) with an 88 year old. She was more fun and cooler than anyone I knew. We played nursing home gigs until she got sick of practicing – and later admitted she only did music for the camaraderie! Fair enough. I am hitting the big 7-0 in two days. I’m happy to be feet down, thrilled to have made it to this esteemed club of wrinklies, especially considering the short life spans of a lot of my clan, and I always have some project on the boil. I am pretty sure a lot of them will be left unfinished, including the mess in my study, but that’s why you have kids. Just kidding. A wise lady once told me, “You gotta have a project until you die. That’s life.”
It’s interesting you mention “projects”, Susan. I recently read “Getting Things Done” by David Allen. It completely changed my time management system. A core concept in GTD is to look at whatever task(s) you have on the go as projects, prioritize them, and work solely on what is most important. It’s been a game-changer. Here’s the link if anyone is interested: https://www.amazon.com/Getting-Things-Done-Stress-Free-Productivity-ebook/dp/B00KWG9M2E/ref=monarch_sidesheet
That book looks great. I do have a weakness for anything that moves you forward, whether it’s decluttering vlogs, fix-it books, or self-help as described in David Allen’s book. You know I’m going to drop a dime on this one too. Thanks for the suggestion and thought-provoking article. Those half-finished manuscripts, paintings, and music won’t know what hit ’em! LOL
Love this line:
Try to love on your wife
And stay close to your friends
Toast each sundown with wine
Don’t let the old man in.
We just lost a dear friend to brain cancer. Man, he fought hard and we did indeed toast him last night. I am grateful that my husband is very very good at staying in touch with the folks who are precious to us. Me, not so good at it but I am trying to do better.
So sorry to hear this, Kris. And, yes, that really is a great set of lyrics.
Country music has some lyrics that approach real poetry as well as damn good advice for living.
You’re certainly right, Mike. I’ve been a country fan since the 80s and watched the progress of some of the best musical talent who ever lived.
I was five days past 69 when my first book released. That was 17 books ago. And it was three days after my mom passed away at 94. I’m hoping to still be putting out books when I reach her age. Enjoyed the song and this post.
You deserve a medal and a pedestal to wear it from, Patricia! Well done!!
It is so encouraging to hear all these young at heart stories. I took a creative writing course when I retired from teaching. My husband and I moved provinces shortly afterwards. I joined a writing group, an amateur acting group and the nearest gym. When Covid hit, everything closed and I focused on my writing. I finished a trilogy of books then began the revision process – there was a lot to learn. I’m at the point of sending out query letters for the first book. Besides writing, I enjoy walking our dog in our rural area and traveling to visit my three sons and their offspring in three separate provinces. We just returned from a ski trip to British Columbia with my youngest grandson and will head out to our cottage for the summer months. My laptop goes with me so I can work on my dream of having my stories published.
Nice to hear from you, Kathleen. I’m curious as to what part of Canada you’re in. I live in Nanaimo on Vancouver Island. And best wishes for your publication!
We live in Ottawa, but I originate from Winnipeg. I have sons in Winnipeg, Regina and Middleton, Nova Scotia. My sister used to live in Langford and now resides in Hope. Vancouver Island is a beautiful area of Canada. Thank you for your best wishes for publication. It’s a lengthy process.
Kathleen, I grew up outside Winnipeg in a little village called Rennie. It’s in the Whiteshell Park near the Ontario border.
Clint gave excellent advice. Love it! Bob follows the same route as you, Garry. It’s why he returned to work and remains active at 67 years young. Helps that his wife is 11 years younger, too. 😉
Old Bob sounds like a bit of a cradle robber, Sue. Ever met the lady?
What old person? I don’t have time to be old. I traveled for 18 months after retiring, visiting all the places where I had my characters go. Then I found a place where I wanted to live.
At 67 I bought 101 acres and started rescuing mustangs. I now have 5 mustangs and 2 quarter horses–all rescues. Along with 2 rescued dogs.
Then I decided to go back to work full time while writing when I discovered there were no nurses in the area willing to work with medically fragile children with their home. I had 2 kids for awhile until I fell (my fault) and ended up with a major issue that took me 8 months to get over–while I continued to write–and am now back at work with my fulltime kid. My only concession to age is to work within my limits–for now. I’ll go back to pushing them when the weather turns nice and I can work with the horses. I have one I want to ride and it will take a bit of coaxing since she is very stubborn–just like her owner.
BTW–I’m 75 and have no intention of sitting in a rocker watching the grass grow.
Good for you, Barbara. This is the stuff I love to hear!!