By Kathryn Lilley TKZ Founder
Yes, Ladies and Gentlemen, it’s that time of year again.
VALENTINE’S DAY
is on SUNDAY. (In case you forgot, there are probably still a few good cards left at your local Hallmark Store.)
But let’s forget for a moment the shallow realm of cute puppies with flowers, kissy-face couples, hearts drawn in the sand, soft-porn sexual innuendo cards, all that corny blah blah blah. Let’s get to the root of this over-commercialized holiday we call Valentine’s Day.
Valentine’s Day is about Love.
Romantic Love.
Real Love.
True Love.
True, Real, Romantic, Intense, Even-when-its Prospects are Gone or Gone Hopelessly Missing, L-O-V-E.
We have all (or, almost all) experienced that particular life-upending emotion called True Love, at some point in time. Even when it has somehow been lost or overwritten by life’s vicissitudes, True Love remains forever in one’s heart. You can never rid yourself of your One True Love. Even if He or She is no longer nestled in a loving embrace next to you at the Midnight Hour, your One True Love is still there. Well hidden, perhaps, but He/She is there, lurking. Ready to pounce on your emotional status quo.
Perhaps you’ve tried to dismiss your One True Love; you may even assume that you’ve forgotten all about that Love. It happened so long ago, after all. Something went wrong, and by now you’ve long since written off the whole experience as a regrettable “When Love Goes Wrong”-ish duet, one best left in the past.
But then, many years later, there pops up a reminder. You’ll be driving down a rainy highway late one night, semi-blinded by the zigzag streaks of oncoming headlights, and a particular song comes over the radio. And then something seizes your heart: a memory. That memory twists your innards, all over again. The pain of your loss returns, like it happened yesterday. Love, lost. You change channels to silence that pesky reminder. The source of that reminder? That source was your One True Love.
Or maybe you are one of the Lucky Ones. Maybe you are presently happily, intensely living in blissful harmony with your One True Love. If so, count your blessings. And if you are so blessed to be living in union with your One True Love, on Valentine’s Day this year (it’s on Sunday. Remember that) please do that person a favor. Send Him (or Her) a decent card this year, okay? No puppies, sexual jokes, or sand hearts allowed. A personal message, written by you, not by Hallmark, would be appropriate. True Love is an important thing. It’s not a cheapie card and a teddy bear accompanied by chocolates and/or hottie-babe pajamas, no matter what the TV hucksters tell you.
So here’s my question for You regarding the topic of “Valentine’s Day”:
If you were to ask your Heart the following question: “Which novel best describes the way I feel (or felt) about the One True Love of my life,” which title would your Heart suggest? Or, (if you’re feeling truly brave), which song title would your Heart recognize?
And…Happy Valentine’s Day, Y’all.
Tom Sawyer and Becky Thatcher, when he takes the teacher’s whipping for her.
I know from meeting your beautiful spouse that you are one of the Lucky Ones, Jim. And you are wise as a writer and editor to single out a specific scene as your descriptive choice, rather than simply mentioning the novel’s title. Happy Valentine’s Day wishes to you and your One True Love, a tad early.
A couple come to mind for me:
The Thorn Birds by Colleen McCollough. (sp?). Big juicy fat book of forbidden love and a sad ending of course.
Shogun by James Clavell. Technically, it’s probably more a historical saga than romance but the love affair between Blackthorne and Mariko is poignant. Tragedy ensues again!
Jane Eyre. What’s not to love about these two?
Oh, I’d forgotten Shogun. I loved that book so much. I’m going to go back and reread it.
For me, I think THE AGE OF INNOCENCE comes closest to expressing that deeply felt mutual yearning felt by two people falling in love. I hated the ending, where he doesn’t knock on her door. But, that ending was way more realistic and authentic than those Hollywood romance movies where the guy or gal always goes running back physically to reconnect, a la Pretty Woman. That ending was laugh-out-loud funny, but not meant to be, I think.
Didnt read Wharton’s book but LOVED the movie version, which I am told is pretty true to her form. Very un-Scorsese in its understatement. The ending is unbearably poignant.
Yup. It killed me, that ending. But that’s exactly what made that story–in both its book and film versions–so incredibly powerful.
Oh wait…forgot one really great one that I just read!
The End of the Affair by Graham Greene. What a book!
Ooh, that one sounds great. Adding that to my TBR pile!
Hmmm. I’m looking at shelves of murder mysteries — not the right mood for your blog. How about Nick and Nora Charles and “The Thin Man” — without the constant boozing?
I wrote today’s post after spending WAY too much time in our local Hallmark store, examining various ways people choose to express love. I always go for humor in expressing any kind of of emotion in my “real” writing. I’d never be able to write a romance novel, for example. Would never even try. A guy who read one of my books actually said to me, “Don’t ever write a sex scene again. Ever.” I think I broke the romantic mood at just the wrong moment for this reader by having the girl’s cat jump on top of the guy’s butt, or something stupid like that. So, the people who sometimes confuse me with the other author named Kathryn Lilley (who writes some romance or erotica? I think) are DEFINITELY reaching the wrong gal.From some comments I’ve gotten on her behalf, she must know how to write some pretty hot stuff. I think I’m going to have to learn to write way hotter if I’m ever going to have men read any future books.
My one true love is my child. It’s not a romantic kind of love, it’s realistic, so maybe it doesn’t apply here?
A mother’s love for her child is the truest form of love in the universe. And best thing, you’re not limited to just one! ?
I actually got back together with my first love over 30 years after we broke up. Back then, the song that was hard for me to listen to was the Eagles, “Best of my Love.” Then when we reunited, it didn’t last long. It wasn’t meant to be, so I would have to say the same song applies. I can never listen to it without thinking of him. We still communicate by email as friends, believe it or not. I’d never go back again though.
Funny how that works, isn’t it? It’s like a lyric segment of one of my favorite songs, BREATHE:
“‘There’s a light at each end of the tunnel,’ you shout, but you’re just as far in as you’ll ever be out, and these mistakes you’ve made, you’ll just make them again, if you only try turning around.”
Your story, Rebecca, is an example of the truth behind that lyric. If we simply turn around and run back into the arms of that Lost Love, that love will simply be lost, once again.
(Sigh).
Like Nancy Reagan used to say, to our Lost Loves, going forward we must “Just Say No.”
(Yes, I had to Google around a bit to find the exact wording of those lyrics–it’s not like I’m so OBSESSED by that song that I memorized its lyrics…?
Thank you so much for joining our discussion today, Rebecca!